Judgmental Jokes
9 judgmental jokes and hilarious judgmental puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about judgmental that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Rib-Tickling Judgmental Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What is a good judgmental joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
I'm 25 years old and finally decided to tell my parents and the rest of my family that I don't want kids
The look on my mom and dad's face was pretty judgmental, but my wife and two children took it really, really hard.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A barbarian s**... in Rome somehow won the attention of Caesar's daughter
They became lovers. To avoid pregnancy, they agreed to o**... s**... only. After just a few encounters, they were caught in the act. At first the barbarian, imprisoned and sentenced to fight to entertain the crowd, regretted his poor judgment.
Eventually, though, he was gladiator.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Afterlife for IRS Cheaters
Tony and his friend John die in a car accident and go to judgment. God tells Tony that because he cheated on his income taxes, the only way he can enter Heaven is to sleep with a s**..., ugly woman for the next five years.
A few days later, as Tony's walking in the park with his s**..., hideous new girlfriend, he spots his friend John with an absolutely drop dead gorgeous woman. "John, what happened?" Tony asks.
"I have no idea," John replies. "I was told I have five years of amazing s**... to look forward to. The only thing I don't understand is why she always yells 'Damn income taxes!' whenever we have s**...."
A Trucker Hates Lawyers so Much That When he Sees Them he Always Runs Them Over
One day he sees a priest hitchhiking and decides to give a ride to the holy man. As they go along the road, the trucker spots a lawyer by the side of the road and steers to run him over. At the last minute he remembers the priest in the truck and swerves away hoping to avoid judgment of his sins.
He says "I'm sorry father, I don't know what came over me!"
The priest replies, "Don't worry, I got him with the door!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A religious monk is approached by a demoness.
She tells him he must choose between three evils:
1. Kill a goat.
2. Drink alcohol.
3. Have s**... with her.
Knowing they are all against his good judgment, he decides to do whichever causes the least harm, so he drinks the alcohol.
He then proceeds to kill the goat and have s**... with the demoness.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a gathering of judgmental Catholics?
Critical Mass.
Some people are so judgmental.
You can tell just by looking at them.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Folks in my hometown are so judgmental!
I(40) tried to take my wife(19) out for a nice dinner and everyone kept staring and calling me a p**...! It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a ironic judgmental hippopotamus?
Hippo-critic.
(Lol this s**... but I just thought of it)
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