Judgemental Jokes
21 judgemental jokes and hilarious judgemental puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about judgemental that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Judgemental Short Jokes
Short judgemental jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The judgemental humour may include short emotional jokes also.
- My girlfriend just admitted she used to be a Christian, so I broke up with her. It might seem judgemental, but I have only known her since she was Christine.
- A Jehovah's Witness knocked at my door this morning. Could you spare a few moments to talk about the Judgement Day? he asked.
Well, I replied, I'm not a big fan of the Terminator series. I Said - I recently became a therapist and had a new girl come in today I could tell she thought I was judgemental the minute I looked at her
- Against my better judgement, I decided to attend the local Cannibal Convention The decision has been nawing at me for some time now, but I'm trying to have fun and not let it consume me.
- I'll never join one of those online dating services because I prefer to meet someone the good old-fashioned way... Through alcohol and poor judgement...
- Whenever I speak to religious people about my beliefs, I receive a lot of judgement. It seems that Jesus is the only one who truly accepts me for who I am!
- GUILTY! What do you call a judge who decides the verdict before the case is even heard?
Judgemental
Share These Judgemental Jokes With Friends
Judgemental One Liners
Which judgemental one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with judgemental? I can suggest the ones about judge ordered and verdict.
- So many people these days are too judgemental I can tell just by looking at them
- What do you call a crazy judge? Judgemental
- I don't know why i was thrown in jail by the judge I only called him judgemental
- What did the indecisive nimbus say? "Something is clouding my judgement"
- What is the most judgemental hot tub? A j'cuzzie
- What's the most judgemental fruit? A Jury-an
- There's so many court officials around today it really has been an era of judgement.
- Why does everyone agree when you judge someone's voice? Because you make sound judgement.
- What is colder than the dwarf planet Pluto? Legal judgements against fathers
Delightful Fun Judgemental Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about judgemental you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean judge ruled jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make judgemental pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Judgement day
Peter is on trial. He's on trial because he shot his wife when he caught her in bed with another guy.
The judge wants to know; "why did you shoot your wife?".
"Well, " Peter replies, "it seemed easier to shoot her once, than to shoot a different guy every week".
A woman and her husband were arguing over the current precipitation...
The woman insisted it was drizzling outside while her husband said that really, it was just misting.
They decided that the argument would be settled by asking their elderly former soviet neighbor Rudolf.
Rudolf grimaced at the sky for a moment and held up a hand to catch some of the falling moisture. "It is drizzle," he declared.
The husband, a little put out by losing the argument, complained. "And why are we accepting our neighbors judgement?"
"Because," the wife replied, "Rudolf the red knows rain, dear."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three things I cannot stand:
* s**... people
* judgemental people
* double standards
* people who can't count
* lists
* irony
Animals getting frisky
A father and son are standing on a hill looking out over a plain. Seeing a pair of animals getting intimate, the son turns to his father and says "Dad, why is that buffalo getting on top of another boy buffalo? Is it gay?"
The father turns to the son to admonish him.
"You shouldn't be judgemental of another person or animal for the sexuality!"
While he says this, the same buffalo mounts a female.
"Anyway, it's bison."
So I'm reading a book about a movie star that was born a woman but then comes out as identifying as male, but no one gets upset or judgemental about it, they just accept it and get on with their lives. It's a good book...
It's a real page turner
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An alcoholic sees a blonde nurse
An alcoholic walks into a nurses office. The blonde nurse asks "What seems to be the problem?". So the alcoholic says "I've been having a rough, scratchy feeling in my t**... lately". She asks "Well that do you mostly eat and drink?". He replies "Mostly scotch". The alcoholic sees the nurses' eyes widen in shock and judgement, and in a reflex of dismissal he adds "On the rocks though". Her mood quickly shifts from shock to anger and says "WELL THERES' YOUR PROBLEM! STOP DRINKING ROCKS, s**...!".
