Juan Jokes
140 juan jokes and hilarious juan puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about juan that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for a good laugh? Check out Juan Jokes – a hilarious collection of jokes about the funniest guy around!
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Funniest Juan Short Jokes
Short juan jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The juan humour may include short don juan jokes also.
- Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet. Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
- My girlfriend told me she was pregnant, so I started looking for some names... ...in the end I chose Juan Carlos and took the first flight to Spain.
- Did you hear about the Mexican that got stabbed on a golf course? I guess someone made a hole in Juan.
- I'm so poor…. That when people see me walking down the street with only one flip-flop on they say to me yo Juan you lost a flip flop and I say no I didn't, I found one!
- How many Mexicans does it take to replace a serviceable part of a complex machine? Just Juan and Emmanuel.
- Why didn't the Mexican ever walk into a glass door again? Because Juan does not simply walk into more doors.
- What do you call a guy thats half Mexican and half Chinese that wears only one sneaker? Juan Chu
- When the Mexican guy forgot his ticket to the water park, the employee let him in anyway Typically I'm a stickler about this sort of thing, he remarked But I'm gonna let this Juan slide.
- My Mexican friend had twin boys and couldn't come up with names.. I suggested Juan and Two
- What's the difference between a really good golfer and a police officer on paid administrative leave? One shot a hole in one, the other shot a hole in Juan.
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Juan One Liners
Which juan one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with juan? I can suggest the ones about mexican juan and .
- I hate tacos! Said no Juan ever.
- I don't like tacos Said no Juan ever.
- What do you call a Mexican Jedi? Obi-Juan
- What do you call the top wealthiest people in Mexico? The Juan percent.
- What do Mexicans play at their funerals? Another Juan Bites The Dust
- "I'm Jose!" Said no Juan ever.
- What do you call a Mexican man who escapes the cops? The Juan that got away.
- How do Mexicans play basketball? Juan on Juan.
- why didn't Maria go to prom? she had no Juan to go with
- I would like to get deported Said no Juan ever.
- I'm a regular Don Juan The ladies Don Juan anything to do with me
- How do you get a Mexican across the border using only math? Carry the Juan
- What do you call the Mexican airforce? Twenty Juan Pilots
- I witnessed a Mexican Standoff the other day. It was Juan v Juan.
- How does a Mexican build a house? Juan nail at a time.
Don Juan Jokes
Here is a list of funny don juan jokes and even better don juan puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do u call a Mexican who survives a shootout and lives to tell the tale? The Juan who lived.
- When Juan told me he was scratching himself during a questionnaire, I was surprised. After all, nobody expects the Spanish in-quiz itching.
- What do you call a Mexican golfer with a gunshot wound? Hole in Juan.
- I see two Mexicans fighting Call that a Juan on Juan
- There was a major car pileup in Mexico Luckily, no Juan was hurt.
- I keep hearing about this great new MCU show featuring what I can only assume are Hispanic superheroes... but I can't seem to find this *Juan Division* on any streaming service.
- My friend told me he can think of over 300 Spanish names... but I can only think of Juan.
- This new guy Juan has been hanging out with me and friends lately and honestly, I'm not a fan. He very controlling and manipulative. And no Juan is going to tell me what to do.
- Two Hispanic guys are having a private conversation A little Juan on Juan.
- What do you call a Mexican who steals spaceships? Rogue Juan
Mexican Juan Jokes
Here is a list of funny mexican juan jokes and even better mexican juan puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Seven days without Mexican food.... Makes Juan weak.
- What did the Mexican sing to his cheating girlfriend? ♪ I know I'm not the only Juan ♪
- How do you know if a Mexican party is a success? When every Juan is dancing
- What do you call two Mexicans fighting each other? JUAN ON JUAN
- What do you call a Mexican who loves Uno? Juan.
- What you call a house with a Mexican and American ghost? A Juan-Ted house
- What does a Mexican bachelor make for dinner? Dinner for Juan.
- Hey, did you hear about the Mexican-Indian twins that just moved in next door? They're identical too! Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
- what's a Mexicans favourite type of joke? Juan liners
- I can't stand it when my Mexican friend is late I wait for no Juan.
San Juan Jokes
Here is a list of funny san juan jokes and even better san juan puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- In New Orleans, an apple pie is $5.94, while in San Juan, it's $3.99. These are the pie-rates of the Caribbean
- The San Diego Padres visited an orphanage in Mexico... "It's really sad to see their faces with no hope" said Juan, age 9.
- Hey, are we boarding the ARA San Juan
Comical & Quirky Juan Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about juan you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make juan pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call rich Mexicans?
The Juan percent.
What would be a great name for a Mexican Boy Band?
Juan Direction.
Three Mexicans walk in to a bar...
You'd think Juan would've seen it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Mexicans does it take to mow the lawn?
Only Juan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
You know, Mexican and b**... jokes are really starting to bore me.
Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal.
Mary and Sue are discussing good-looking boys in their high school.
Mary asks "Have you seen that new Mexican kid Amal Garcia?"
"Garcia?" Sue responds. "No, but I think I've seen his brother Juan"
Mary replies "They're identical twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
New band.
I'm starting a new band with 5 homosexual Mexicans.
Juan Direction.
What do the Mexican highlander say when he won a duel?
THERE CAN BE ONLY JUAN!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
a golfer stabbed a Mexican the other day....
it was a hole in Juan
"Oh man, Juan Valdez died this morning."
Ok, so it's not a 'joke' joke, but that's what you say. Maybe at work, at the bar with friends. Say it in a lull in the conversation. If you're really good, say it while scanning the paper or a news site.
Some people go, "oh!" And some people say, "wait, the Colombian coffee merchant?" and some people say, "oh my god, he *did?*" People always say something.
And then *you* say, "he did, he was assassinated. Someone from a drug cartel shot him with a golf gun. Bizarre story."
And you leave it there.
And if someone presses further, perhaps mention how terrible it must be to get shot by a golf gun.
And you'll eventually be asked, "what's a golf gun?"
To which you say, "don't know, but it sure made a hole in Juan!"
So Juan, Pablo, and Jose are all attempting to cross the border legally...
A border guard stops when he sees only one of them has the correct papers, and says
'Whoa whoa whoa there can be only Juan!'
I'll see myself out
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I got in to a gun fight with a mexican at a golf club.
I shot a hole in Juan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about the Mexican hit-man who was a chronic masturbator?
He got excited when he was ordered to rub Juan out.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know the world's first s**... was Mexican? He even inspired the s**... motto.
Juan shot, Juan kill.
How many workers does it take to run a burrito factory?
Just Juan
Unexpected car wash...
So a guy in a pick up truck goes to a car wash, after a few minutes he gets waved in and starts to drive away. He looks back and sees a Spanish guy drying his rear window in the bed of his truck. He freaks out, swerves and a cop who sees all of this pulls him over. While the cop is walking up to the cab of the truck, the truck driver says "no one is going to believe this!" The Spanish guy looks up and says "NO! Juan will believe this!!!"
Who's the loneliest Mexican
Juan
My friend opened a mexican-thai fusion bar.
Named Thai Juan On.
What do Mexican and Black people have in common?
Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
What do you call it when the bull impales the bullfighter?
A hole in Juan!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Irish Mexican teenager starts a job as a builder..
Only one hour into his first job he tries to hammer a nail with a screwdriver. The boss spots this and walks over to let him know he's doing it wrong. "You've got a lot to learn young p**... Juan".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How will Donald Trump build such a huge wall without congressional approval?
By forcing every Juan to work on it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I hate Cinco De Mayo!
-Said no Juan ever
Two twins were separated at birth
One of them lived in Cuba, and was named Juan. The other lived in Egypt, and was named Jamal.
10 years after their birth, their birth mother was sent a picture of one of the twins. "I wish I could see the other one," she said. The adoption mother then said,
" If you've seen juan, you've seen jamal."
"Me llamo Pedro,"
said no Juan ever.
Filipino Word of the Day: Chicken Nut Bread
Juan: My girlpren hab asthma so sometimes chicken nut bread..
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Black jokes and Mexican jokes are all the same...
Once you've seen Juan you've seen Jamal.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a Mexican that's in the rebellion?
A Rogue Juan
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a pessimistic Mexican doing math?
Negative Juan.
How many mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?
Juan.
*SPOILER* - For those who dont get it, if u say "juan" in spanish, it sounds like "one" in english.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I like my women like I like my coffee.
Wrapped in a burlap sack and hauled across the border on a donkey by Juan Valdez.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call it when a Mexican man shoots himself?
a hole in Juan
What did the ICE agents say after they finished eating at a diner?
"I think we'll take Juan for the road too."
What do you call a Spanish king in Africa?
Juan man to rule Jamal.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy says, "Obstetricians named Juan can't seem to learn the whole alphabet."
His friend replies, "Why??"
"I dunno. For some reason they always get stuck at B."
"That's ridiculous. O.B. Juan can know 'B'"
I'll show my self out.
I just found out that George Clooney's wife has a twin brother named Juan who looks exactly like her
Some people say that once you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal
My neighbors all refer to me as The Lawnmower Whisperer.
Talking with lawnmowers is quite simple, actually. All you have to do is say, ¿Hola, cómo estás, Juan?
Two mexican children are learning how to count in english
The first one asks: "What was it that comes after twenty?
The second one absentmindedly replies: "What?"
To which the first one angrily responds: "Twenty, Juan!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a s**... change on a Mexican golf course?
A hole in Juan
When it comes to the ladies, I'm a regular Don Juan ...
... the ladies Don Juan anything to do with me.
Two mexicans walk into a haunted forest...
...Only Juan comes out.
I once knew a mexican carpenter who specialised in bedroom furniture, and he always bragged about never sleeping with the same girl twice.
Juan Nightstand
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Mexican and African jokes are all pretty much the same....
Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I used to be a p**... at a Mexican golf resort.
They called me hole in Juan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many jokes does it take to make a Mexican smile?
Juan.
Have you ever seen a Spanish Muslim?
Once you see juan, you see jamal.
Did you know Juan the horse has a brother named jamal?
Nothing really special, they're identical twins.
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal
