The Best 61 Juan Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Juan jokes. There are some juan ese jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these juan jose puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Juan Jokes and Puns

What do you call rich Mexicans?

The Juan percent.

I hate tacos!

Said no Juan ever.

How many Mexicans does it take to mow the lawn?

Only Juan.

Juan joke, How many Mexicans does it take to mow the lawn?

You know, Mexican and Blacks jokes are really starting to bore me.

Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal.

Mary and Sue are discussing good-looking boys in their high school.

Mary asks "Have you seen that new Mexican kid Amal Garcia?"

"Garcia?" Sue responds. "No, but I think I've seen his brother Juan"

Mary replies "They're identical twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!"


How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just Juan.

My girlfriend told me she was pregnant, so I started looking for some names...

...in the end I chose Juan Carlos and took the first flight to Spain.

Juan joke, My girlfriend told me she was pregnant, so I started looking for some names...

why didn't Maria go to prom?

she had no Juan to go with

I don't like tacos

Said no Juan ever.

How many Mexicans do you need working in the kitchen?

Just Juan.

a golfer stabbed a Mexican the other day....

it was a hole in Juan

You can explore juan amal reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean juan miguel dad jokes. There are also juan puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


"Oh man, Juan Valdez died this morning."

Ok, so it's not a 'joke' joke, but that's what you say. Maybe at work, at the bar with friends. Say it in a lull in the conversation. If you're really good, say it while scanning the paper or a news site.

Some people go, "oh!" And some people say, "wait, the Colombian coffee merchant?" and some people say, "oh my god, he *did?*" People always say something.

And then *you* say, "he did, he was assassinated. Someone from a drug cartel shot him with a golf gun. Bizarre story."

And you leave it there.

And if someone presses further, perhaps mention how terrible it must be to get shot by a golf gun.

And you'll eventually be asked, "what's a golf gun?"

To which you say, "don't know, but it sure made a hole in Juan!"

A woman has twins...

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal." '

So Juan, Pablo, and Jose are all attempting to cross the border legally...

A border guard stops when he sees only one of them has the correct papers, and says
'Whoa whoa whoa there can be only Juan!'

I'll see myself out

I got in to a gun fight with a mexican at a golf club.

I shot a hole in Juan.

How does a Mexican build a house?

Juan nail at a time.

Juan joke, How does a Mexican build a house?

How do Mexicans play basketball?

Juan on Juan.

"I'm Jose!"

Said no Juan ever.

How many Mexicans does it take to replace a serviceable part of a complex machine?

Just Juan and Emmanuel.


Jesus take the wheel

Carlos take the stereo, Manuel get the seats and I'll be the Juan on watch.

How do you get a Mexican across the border using only math?

Carry the Juan

An Irish Mexican teenager starts a job as a builder..

Only one hour into his first job he tries to hammer a nail with a screwdriver. The boss spots this and walks over to let him know he's doing it wrong. "You've got a lot to learn young Paddy Juan".

How will Donald Trump build such a huge wall ​without congressional approval​​?

By forcing every Juan to work on it.

I hate Cinco De Mayo!

-Said no Juan ever

What do you get when you shoot a Mexican golfer?

A hole in Juan

What do Mexicans play at their funerals?

Another Juan Bites The Dust

Two twins were separated at birth

One of them lived in Cuba, and was named Juan. The other lived in Egypt, and was named Jamal.
10 years after their birth, their birth mother was sent a picture of one of the twins. "I wish I could see the other one," she said. The adoption mother then said,
" If you've seen juan, you've seen jamal."

What do u call a Mexican who survives a shootout and lives to tell the tale?

The Juan who lived.

What do you call the top wealthiest people in Mexico?

The Juan percent.

Hispanic and black jokes are really all the same...

Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

Black jokes and Mexican jokes are all the same...

Once you've seen Juan you've seen Jamal.

What do you call a guy thats half Mexican and half Chinese that wears only one sneaker?

Juan Chu

What do you call a Mexican man who escapes the cops?

The Juan that got away.

I like my women like I like my coffee.

Wrapped in a burlap sack and hauled across the border on a donkey by Juan Valdez.

What do you call it when a Mexican man shoots himself?

a hole in Juan

Why are there so many Mexican jokes but no black jokes?

Once you know Juan, you know Jamal

What did the cannibal say to 2 Mexicans?

I thought I'd eat both of you but I only have room for Juan

I witnessed a Mexican Standoff the other day.

It was Juan v Juan.

What's the difference between a really good golfer and a police officer on paid administrative leave?

One shot a hole in one, the other shot a hole in Juan.

I would like to get deported

Said no Juan ever.

What do you call two Mexicans having gay sex?

Juan on Juan

What do you call the Mexican airforce?

Twenty Juan Pilots

Did you hear about the Mexican that got stabbed on a golf course?

I guess someone made a hole in Juan.

What do you call a Mexican golfer with a gunshot wound?

Hole in Juan.

Why didn't the Mexican ever walk into a glass door again?

Because Juan does not simply walk into more doors.

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.

How was he killed asked one detective. With a golf gun. Replied the second detective.

A golf gun? What's a golf gun?

I don't know, but it sure made a hole in Juan

When Juan told me he was scratching himself during a questionnaire, I was surprised.

After all, nobody expects the Spanish in-quiz itching.

How many Mexicans do you need to change a lightbulb?

Juan

I'm a regular Don Juan

The ladies Don Juan anything to do with me

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption

One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Amal. The other goes to a family in Spain. They name him Juan.Β 
Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Amal.
He responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal

Mexican and African jokes are all pretty much the same....

Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal...

Twins

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.

How many jokes does it take to make a Mexican smile?

Juan.

Did you know Juan the horse has a brother named jamal?

Nothing really special, they're identical twins.

If you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal

I see two Mexicans fighting

Call that a Juan on Juan

Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.

Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.

What plane does the Mexican President fly in?

AirForce Juan

I keep hearing about this great new MCU show featuring what I can only assume are Hispanic superheroes...

but I can't seem to find this *Juan Division* on any streaming service.

Juan and Amal are twins, but their mother only carries around a picture of Juan.

When asked why she replies, Once you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.

What the difference between a black joke and a Mexican joke?

Meh, if you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

I can't stand it when my Mexican friend is late

I wait for no Juan.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the juan cinqo jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working juan manuel piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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