jordan Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious jordan puns

I want to adopt two kids...

... with cancer, both named Jordan.

I've always wanted a sick pair of Jordans.


The guy that played Killmonger in Black Panther is great

He's the Michael Jordan of acting.


There was a Gay guy named Billy

Billy was dating a bisexual guy named Jordan. Recently, however, Jordan has started going to parties on Friday nights without inviting Billy. Billy, thinking that Jordan was ashamed of dating a guy, asks to go with him one day.

When they arrive at the bar, he notices that Jordan is not holding his hands like he usually does. When they walk in, a short, drunk blonde girl who wraps her arms around his waist. Jordan introduces the girl as Jean, who tells Billy that she's heard a lot about him. Billy wonders if he told her about their relationship and starts to get jealous. He tells Jordan that he's going to go home early.

Jordan follows him to the door and asks why he is leaving. Billy just says that he is not having fun and tells him to have fun with his "friend". Jordan realizes what this was all about and tells him that the girl was just someone he used to date. She recently had a child and he wanted to know whether the child was his or not.

Billy doesn't believe Jordan's story. He rolls his eyes and starts walking away again. However, Jordan stops him and looks him right in the eye. Then, he says, "Billy, Jean is not my lover. She's just some girl who said that I am the one. But the kid is not my son."


My dad is like the Michael Jordan of dads.

He has a serious gambling problem.



1000 men entered Jordan last night

She said she will be fine after a bit of rest


Footballer Dwight Yorke just got denied entry to the US due to an Iranian stamp in his passport.

Makes a change at least, most of his troubles are from briefly entering Jordan.


Match the middle eastern country to its sworn enemy...

- Bahrain
- Lebanon
- Qatar
- United Arab Emirates
- Egypt
- Syria
- Jordan
- Iran
- Iraq
- Saudi Arabia
- Algeria
- Morocco
- Yemen
- Oman
- Kuwait

1. Israel


Why do women love Jordan Spieth?

Because he came second.


Studying for MCAT when I heard this Joke!

I was studying for the MCAT while listening to an audiobook for a chapter on the endocrine system. Anyways, at the end of the audiobook the guy signs of saying: "Hey John, how do you make a hormone anyway?"... "That's easy Jordan, you just don't pay her." Loled so hard!


In Israel, we just want peace.

A piece of Jordan, a piece of Egypt, a piece of Lebanon...


What does Michael Jordan like to put on his toast for breakfast?

Space Jam


Michael Jordan tried escaping his nickname in Germany...

but they still called him Herr Jordan.


Friend told me that I was already the Michael Jordan of my sport

I play baseball.


What do you call a German guy wearing basketball shoes?

Herr Jordan


When Montell Jordan introduces you to his friends, but your name sounds like a title to one of his songs...

"This is Howie Dewitt!"


What does Michael Jordan do in Krispy Kreme?

Dunkin Donut


Did you know that, in his prime, Michael Jordan could jump higher than an average house?

The average house cannot jump nor does it have legs.


Why did a grieving Michael Jordan apply for a KFC job in Tokyo?

Because he bereaves he can fry.


Which Jordans are the only ones acceptable in Alabama?

Air Jordan one inbred.


You know what the B in Michael B Jordan stands for?

Basketball. Crazy right...


What do Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan have in common?

They both play ball in the Minor League.


Guys, I know Michael Jordan very well...

.. He just doesn't know me.


Why did the Chicago Bulls keep Scotty Pippen on the team?

So Michael Jordan had something to put his cigars out on.


Why don't you ever see Michael Jordan at Wimbledon?

Only whites allowed


If somebody where's Jordan sneakers....

They're a J-Walker.


This Jordanian pilot story is sure a hot topic today.


What does Micheal Jordan put on his toast?

Space Jam!


I feel like Jordans International Airport missed a big oppurtunity to call their airport...

Air Jordan.


What did Jordan Peele say when he heard he won an Oscar

Thank you


What are the most funny Jordan jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Jordan? Well, here are the best Jordan dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Jordan pick up lines to share with friends.


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