The Best 33 Joked Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Joked jokes. There are some joked jokester jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these joked mused puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Joked Jokes and Puns

Do you know any jokes?

**Her:** "Do you know any jokes?"

**Me:** "No."

**Her:** "I'll teach you one."

"Knock! Knock!"

**Me:** "Who's there?"

**Her:** "Ash."

"Now ask, Ash: who?"

**Me:** "Ash: who?"

**Her:** "Please cover your mouth when you sneeze."

**Me: rekt**

On January 1st I joked to my girlfriend we haven't had sex all year.

It's getting less funnier each day I tell her.

My girlfriend "Dad joked" me on a hike.

I asked my girlfriend what she thought trees would sound like if they talked while on a hike.
She said "I bet we couldn't understand them"
I said "why do you think that?"
She said "because they probably only bark"
She then laughed the next half mile down the trail barking occasionally and saying "shh, shh, do you hear that? Thats a tree talking in the distance"

I happily dad joked my fiancΓ©

While on her way to work, she texted me saying she only put deodorant on one side.

To which I replied, "At least you won't smell half bad!"

George Carlin once famously joked, "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."

Thanks to all those people wearing masks but leaving their noses fully exposed, the stupider half is now a lot easier to spot.

My 10-year old daughter just Dad joked me.

She said she was leaving to get cigarettes and never came home.

I joked about how bad our apartment building's foundation was

Even the walls started cracking up

Joked joke, I joked about how bad our apartment building's foundation was

I was having dinner at my girlfriend's house for the first time.

"Excuse me, I just need the toilet," I said, excusing myself from the table.

"Don't forget to spray the air freshener!" joked the dad.

I said, "No need. Cocaine doesn't smell."

What is a better name for cows?

Lawn mooers!

My 12 year old sister made this up... She out dad joked me..and I'm a dad!

I was with my mom today when some guy backed into our car.

I joked with my mom "That guy's pull out game is weak." My mom replied "Not as weak as your dad's."

True story: When I shaved my Movember stache on Dec 1st...

I thought I looked really young, so I joked with my wife: "how does it feel to be married to a 12-year-old boy?"

She replied: "Better than a 12-year-old boy molester."


You can explore joked quips reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean joked avicii dad jokes. There are also joked puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

How i out dad joked my dad...

So the preview for some time traveling movie comes on tv and my dad goes "if you ever find a time machine remember not to use it," somehow thinking it's funny.

I'm ashamed to say the first thing out of my mouth was "seems like a great way to pass the time."

My girlfriend told me, I get really self conscious when I'm out in public.

I joked, Come on, you aren't that ugly.

She said, No, but you are.

Sexual harassment should not be joked about

It's a very touchy subject to some people

I was telling my friend in the pub about how I was having sex with this woman and she farted.

"I imagine that doesn't happen very often," he replied.

"No," I joked, "I didn't even know women did it."

He said, "I wasn't referring to that part."

Dad joked my 5 year old to annoyance

I: Did Mom tie your hair up like that to show you how your hair would be if cut short?

She: No, Mom just put my hair in a bun.

I: Is it a burger bun?

She: You know it's not!

I: It's a knot?

She: Aaargh. Stop joking!

Joked joke, Dad joked my 5 year old to annoyance

"Pity about your boys coming in fourth in the world Cup!" joked Trump to Theresa May.

"Yeah..." she replied. "Pity about your boys coming second in Vietnam. Oh, you weren't there, were you?"

On January 1st I joked to my wife we haven't had sex all year.

Just like last year.

I walked into the shop, glimpsing my beard covered in snow as I entered

"You're a few weeks late aren't you Santa?" the girl behind the counter joked, smiling.

"Ho, ho, ho!" I fired back at her, in an uncharacteristic misogynistic outburst.

The Pilot

The pilot gave his normal address to the passengers, this is your captain speaking, we will be ascending to 30000 feet and the flight time is two hours. Unfortunately he forgot to turn off his microphone and he joked to his co pilot that what he would really enjoy was a cup of coffee and a blow job. A hostess rushed to the cockpit to alert the captain about the microphone. A nearby passenger quipped, he also wants a coffee.

A man was water skiing when he fell into the river.

As the boat 
circled to pick him up, he noticed a hunter sitting in a duck boat in the reeds. The man put his hands in the air and joked, Don't shoot!

The hunter responded, Don't quack.

Can we ban Yo Mamma jokes on this sub....

she is my girlfriend and I don't like to see her being joked about

Tim Cook joked about Trump getting his name wrong. Trump claimed it was fake news. Shows a lot about their character...

But that's comparing apples and oranges

Trump joked today that Pence wanted to hang all gay people.

I think Trump misheard him though and Pence actually said he only likes gay men when they are hung.

At a recent meeting at the Vatican the pope joked "I've never seen so many priests in one room"

I guess he's never been to a kids party then

An elderly lady at the doctor's office

grumbled about why she was so sore all the time. The doctor joked, "It must have been due to a dissipated youth." She replied, "I wish I could remember him."

Joked joke, An elderly lady at the doctor's office

I have never joked about gay people who hanged themselves.

That's low hanging fruit.

Dad joked a co-worker today.

Him: Hey Bails6923. How you making out?
Me: With my lips, you?

Ever heard of the comedian who died gasping for air after his routine?

He joked to death.

My Life is Like Music

by Nickelback. Incoherent, disappointing, and all around joked about.

Also, this joke is overplayed. Like Nickelback in the early 2000s.

Johhny Depp once joked about assassinating the president; but what do you call a dead actor?

A corpse

My doctor advised me to avoid my usual calorific Christmas dinner; he even joked that I should get rid of my oven.

So Im going cold turkey.

My friend with cerebral palsy joked that if he took enough quaaludes - he would discover a whole new phase of intoxication: The Stephen Hawking Phase

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the joked heard puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working joked laugh piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes