They're the Tolkien white guys.
That's it. That's the entire fucking joke.
A Jew gets to heaven after passing and meets god. The Jew tells god a Holocaust joke, but god doesn't laugh. The Jew shrugs and says, "I guess you had to be there to understand".
Take your foot off his head.
**
A chicken.
To cover its butt quack.
A Jew gets to heaven after passing and meets god. The Jew tells god a Holocaust joke, but god doesn't laugh. The Jew shrugs and says, "I guess you had to be there to understand".
He neverlands
You really should upvote this joke because it never gets old
Well, a dad joke meets yo momma joke and then they knock knock.
(I made this up myself, I'm really proud of it)
Apparently you're not allowed to nudge the nearest co-worker and say, "get a load of this guy" every time someone walks in.
maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for me.
It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
It sounds like an Italian guy begging you not to kill someone named Gus.
I'm sorry. I'm high as shit and just ate some asparagus. My first original joke.
Her: the baby sure is taking his time getting his meal in
Me: yeah he is really milking it
12 years old and mixed up with coke.
Disclaimer: This is just a joke, i do not condone the practice of mixing whiskey with coke.
None. They're afraid of change- even if it makes the world a brighter place.
(
It's my longest running joke of the year.
...I had tons of private messages from Muslims on this site. As an apology to them I would like to say this:
"Islam is a religion based on peace, love and respect, and this is the central message of the Qur'an. As such I offer a full apology for making the claim that it encourages suicide bombing and violence."
OK, there - I said it. Now can you please stop sending me death threats?
they're white, they're cold, and if you put enough of em together they'll shut down public schools
EDIT* Thanks for the gold! You popped my gold cherry!
its a joke folks. just a joke.
Only two, but they'll wait 6 or 7 seasons before screwing it up.
Kinda like yo momma.
Bear with me...
Rooks can only move in straight lines, whereas bishops have sex with kids.
An old Jew is on his deathbed. With weak voice he asks to call for a partorg because before his death he wants to join the Communist Party. A happy partorg rushes to him with filled out membership form to sign and a ready Party membership card. As the Jew signs the form he carefully takes the membership card and presses it against his heart.
In a peaceful and happy voice he whispers: "Today one more communist will die"
A Fort.
B Fort.
C Fort.
D Fort.
E Fort.
G Fort.
H Fort.
I Fort.
J Fort.
K Fort.
L Fort.
M Fort.
N Fort.
O Fort.
P Fort.
Q Fort.
R Fort.
S Fort.
T Fort.
U Fort.
V Fort.
W Fort.
X Fort.
Y Fort.
Z Fort.
I didn't put any F Fort into this joke.
This joke would be funny if it had a punchline
Wooden tit
Friend :"ok, shoot."
Me: " what has a tiny penis, and hangs down?"
Friend: " I dunno, what?"
Me: " A bat... now, what has an enormous penis and hangs up?"
Friend" I dunno what?"
*click*
sabe inglés?"
"si"
"como se dice 'un zapato' en inglés?"
"a shoe"
"salud"
"gracias
White people looking both ways before they start
A nice Indian woman gets up mid-flight to the US and shouts "Is there a doctor here?"
A nice, serious guy approaches her quickly and tells her: "I am. What is the problem?"
She replies: "Do you want to meet my daughter?"
Irene.
There's no joke here, I just hate that bitch.
$0, it's on the house.
**people keep saying dad joke, funny thing is my mom actually told me this 😂**
.... Just like yo mama.
Because its illegal.
This actually just happened.
Wife and Son are playing an intense game of battle ship.
Son: I-8
Me: I haven't ate... I'm hungry
Wife: (not finding the humor)... miss... E-10
Me: Grammar Nazi.
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