John Wayne Jokes
22 john wayne jokes and hilarious john wayne puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about john wayne that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest John Wayne Short Jokes
Short john wayne jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The john wayne humour may include short john deer jokes also.
- What's the difference between Jack Daniels and John Wayne? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.
- I called up a hotel and the receptionist answered 'Hello, Best Western'... I replied 'True Grit, starring John Wayne.'
- ''It was all part of the act officer, did i fool you?'' - John Wayne Gacy's final words before being executed
- Why is school toilet paper referred to as John Wayne? Because it's rough, tough and won't take s**... off anyone
- If you say "I'm a big fan of John Wayne," it's normal... But add the word Gacy and suddenly you're a w**....
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John Wayne One Liners
Which john wayne one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with john wayne? I can suggest the ones about john lennon and bruce wayne.
- Who has killed more indians than John Wayne? Union Carbide Corporation
- John Wayne Gacy.... Not my idea of a clown!
- Whatdya get when you cross John Wayne with a whale? Moby Duke.
- What is John Wayne Bobbit's favorite book in the Bible? Second Peter.
- What kinda pet would John Wayne get?... He'd get a long little d**....
- Why did John Wayne get a w**... dog? He wanted to get a long little doggy.
Uproarious John Wayne Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about john wayne you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dwayne johnson jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make john wayne pranks.
Police were on the lookout for serial killer John Wayne Gacy
They stepped into a corner store for some coffee and saw a guy in back where the milk cartons are.
Cop 1: "Hey, that looks like our suspect!"
Cop 2: "What's he doing?"
Cop 1: "Talking to himself. Let's get closer."
So they go up right behind him and listen.
Gacy:"Need him. Got him. Got him. Got him. Need him. Got him...."
What's the difference between obsequious behaviour towards someone important in order to gain advantage and John Wayne Gacy wearing a top hat and monocle?
One is sycophancy and the other is a fancy sicko.
(As far as I'm aware this is an original joke that I created and am quite pleased with)
Old western stranger
An old man sitting at the edge of an old western town sees a silhouette approaching from the dusty horizon. Its not long before he realizes that it is a 3 legged dog limping toward him. The old man shouts a warning to the dog "we dont take kindly to strangers around here". The 3 legged dog limps like john wayne while slowly raising his gaze up to look straight into the old mans eyes with a piercing stare and says" Im lookin for the man who shot my paw"
I was with some friends and we started talking about movies.
One of my friends mentioned that the sets in old Westerns were often built slightly smaller than normal to make the leading man appear larger. I said that that would make sense because I heard that John Wayne, while filming a scene with his co-star, complained that the town wasn't big enough for the two of them.
At school one day, the teacher was trying to approach the topic of s**.
.. education and asked her students if they'd ever seen anything that was related to s**... education on TV.
Mary raised her hand and said she had seen a movie about women having babies.
"Great," said the teacher, "that's very important."
Then Judy raised her hand and told the teacher she had seen a TV show about people getting married.
"Well, that has to do with it too," said the teacher.
Then Johnny raised his hand and said he had seen a western where some Indians came riding over the hill and John Wayne shot them all.
The teacher said, "Well, Johnny, that really doesn't have anything to do with s**... education."
"Yes it does," said Johnny, " it taught those Indians not to f**k with John Wayne."