Jogging Jokes
44 jogging jokes and hilarious jogging puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about jogging that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Jogging Short Jokes
Short jogging jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The jogging humour may include short hiking jokes also.
- Every morning at breakfast for the past 6 months, I announce loudly to my family that I'm going for a jog, and then I don't. It's my longest running joke of the year.
- In 2017, i didn't jog. In 2018 i didn't jog. In 2019 i didn't jog. In 2020 i didn't jog. This is a running joke
- Ever since the pandemic started, every morning I proudly announce to my family that I'm going for a jog and then I don't... It's my longest running joke of the year so far...
- The year is 2018 and I don't jog. The year is 2019 and I don't jog. The year is 2020 and I still don't jog. This is a running joke.
- Jogging 2014 Didn't jog
2015 Didn't jog
2016 Didn't jog
2017 Didn't jog
2018 Didn't jog
2019 Didn't jog
2020 Still not jogging
This is a running joke. - 2013: Didn't jog - 2014: Didn't jog - 2015: Didn't jog - 2016: Didn't jog - 2017: Didn't jog - 2018: Didn't jog - 2019: Didn't jog - 2020: Still haven't jogged This is a running joke.
- Prank Caller- Hello! is your refrigerator running?? Me- No, but the dishwasher is..
Prank Caller- Huh???
Me- Yeah my wife's out on a jog... - This morning I choked on water while jogging for the third time this week... Worst running gag ever.
- I went to the gym this morning and hopped on the treadmill People started giving me funny looks, though, so I decided I'd better jog instead.
- My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. He was so right..... I feel 10 years older and I only jogged for 15 minutes
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Jogging One Liners
Which jogging one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with jogging? I can suggest the ones about biking and swimming.
- I got tired jogging in front of the car So I ran behind it, but soon became exhausted.
- Every morning when I jog I reflect on my life and I want to throw up. It's a running gag.
- Every morning I tell my wife I'm going jogging It's a running joke
- I started jogging today Just kidding. I exercised restraint instead.
- I'm so out of shape I can't even jog my memory!
- How come you never see stoners jog? It's hard on their joints.
- Every time I go for a Jog I get hit by the same bike It's a vicious cycle
- I like going for a jog at night The fear of getting murdered really helps my stamina.
- My friend started jogging so he'd live longer. He got hit by a bus and died the next day.
- What's the definition of macho? Jogging home from your vasectomy.
- If you can't remember something Go for a run, and it'll jog your memory
- I've finally come up with a name for my classic rock-themed jogging club. Runs 'n Goeses.
- Sprint should rename their company To slow jog
- What do you call it when a misogynist is your jogging coach? A tool-assisted speedrun
- Want to get noticed? Go jogging without moving your arms.
Cheerful Jogging Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about jogging you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean juggling jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make jogging pranks.
Day 284 without s**......
Went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound
A rabbi and a priest are out for a walk through the park.
It's a hot summer day and as they pass by a pond, the rabbi suggest taking a bath to cool down a little.
The priest is hesitant at first, but since they're at a remote spot with noone around, he agrees.
Just as they have finished taking off their robes a group of ladies is jogging by. The priest hastily covers his c**..., while the rabbi hides his face behind his hands.
When the ladies have passed, the priest asks:
"Why didn't you cover your private parts?"
To which the rabbi replies:
"Well, MY congregation recognizes me by my face. "
I went to college in Hawaii and
While I was jogging on the beach one day, I saw a man in the distance drowning !
He was waving his arms screaming:
Helllppppp.... *Shark* ... please... hellllpppppp
And then I started laughing, haha, cause I knew that that shark wasn't going to help him
A man is jogging along the road when he find an absolutely pristine tennis ball on the ground.
It doesn't seem to belong to anyone. So he picks it up and puts it in his pocket.
While waiting at a cross walk another man notices the bulge and asks "What is that?"
"A tennis ball" he replies.
"Oh, that must hurt a lot! I once had a Tennis Elbow"
I was at the gym today and decided to jump on the treadmill....
People started to give me really funny looks, so I started jogging instead.
What will happen if an 110lb kid is jogging at 4mph, and a 3000lb car hits him at a constant speed of 55mph?
He gets hit by the truck, and is severely injured.
So anyways I lost my license today
The other night I saw a guy jogging n**... in front of my house
I asked him why he was jogging n**... and he said, Cos you came home early.
At the gym,
I decided to hop on the treadmill.
People gave me weird looks so I started jogging instead..
My friend suggested I should go jogging at 7am instead of 7pm and...
I got to admit, it's a night and day difference.
I come home from work early one day, and I saw a guy jogging down the street in his underwear. I askedhim, "Why are you jogging in your underwear?"
He said, "you came home early".
What's the difference between a group of crafty midgets and a jogging club comprised exclusively of women?
The former is a band of cunning runts...
n**... jogger
One day as I came home early from work, I saw a guy jogging n**.... I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early."
Jogging
Guy 1: The doctor told me I had to jog 5 mile per day to save my marriage.
Guy 2: Did it work?
Guy 1: No, one day I only jogged 3 miles, came home and caught the doctor with my wife.
Bill Clinton is out on his morning jog...
and he sees a h**.... As he passes her he says, "Twenty bucks?"
"No way," she answers.
The following morning Bill is jogging with Hillary. They pass the same h**... on the street and she says, "See what you get for twenty bucks?"
Two black holes are jogging in space.
One says "You should slim down to get more attractive."
"Are you dense?" replies the other.
I gave up jogging for health reasons
"I gave up jogging for health reasons. My thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire."
The problem with jogging
Is that by the time you realize jogging isn't working for you, it's already too far to turn back.
A boy asked a girl, what about,
You and me,
Tomorrow night,
Side by side,
Hot and sweaty,
Breathing heavy.
So, whadya say, wanna go jogging or not?
My personal trainer said she wanted me to do a push workout.
I've since been arrested for trying to pull her jogging bottoms down.
