jogger Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious jogger puns

A boy is sitting on a park bench eating candy bar after candy bar after candy bar...

And a jogger stops and says to the boy "Hey kid, you know it's bad for you to sit there eating candy bar after candy bar after candy bar right?" The kid replies "Hey Mister, my grandpa lived to be 97 years old!" The man says "Really? Did he sit there eating candy bar after candy bar after candy bar just like you?" The boy replies "No, but he minded his own fucking business! "


Let the Trucker Sleep

After driving for about six hours, a trucker decides to pull over and sleep for a little while. As soon as he falls asleep, he is awoken by some knocks on the door of the cab.

"Can you tell me the time, please?" asks a jogger.

"Yeah, it's 4:30," answers the trucker. He falls asleep again, but he is awoken again by another jogger who wants to know the time.

"It's 4:40!" yells the trucker. Deciding to really try to sleep a little, he writes on a piece of paper: I DON'T KNOW THE TIME. He sticks the paper in his windshield.

But he is awoken again. 'It's 5:25," says another jogger.


Jogger finds a tennis ball

So Joe is out jogging alongside a tennis court. Unspurprisingly, he spots a tennis ball which has gone over the net. It's getting late and nobody's left playing, he figures they just left the ball there.

So Joe picks up the ball and puts it in his shorts pocket, to play with his dog later. He runs off, and stops by his regular watering hole to rehydrate. One of his friends spots the bulge in his shorts and asks:

"What have you got there Joe?"

"That? That's a tennis ball."

"Dear lord, and I thought having a tennis elbow was bad!"


A man decided to rest after taking a drive...

And goes to sleep in his car. Minutes later a cyclist knocks on his window, waking him up and asks, "Excuse me, do you know what the time is?".The man replies, Sorry, I don't know the time." After going back to sleep, he is awoken again by a jogger, who asks, "Sorry, but do you know what the time is?". The man, quite annoyed, says " I don't know what the time is!" After the jogger leaves, them man makes a sign saying "I do not know what the time is!", leaves it in his window and goes back to sleep. Then, again there is a knock on the window and standing there is a Scout. "What is it you want?", asks the man. The boy replies, "The time's 5:43."


Seems like I keep hearing the same funny thing about a jogger over and over again.

It's kind of a running joke.


Colorado Springs police are looking for the 'Mad Pooper'.

The jogger is suspected in a shit-and-run incident. She's been declared public enemy number two. So far they've been unable to flush her out.


Nude jogger

One day as I came home early from work, I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early."


While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball...

and seeing no one around that it might belong to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts.

Later, on his way home, he stopped at the pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A blonde girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts. "What's that?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with lust.

"Tennis ball," came the breathless reply.

"Oh," said the blonde girl sympathetically, "that must be painful. I had tennis elbow once."


A classic...

A man is sitting on a park bench, enjoying the day. Next to him sits a dog.

A jogger comes by and asks, "Does your dog bite?"

"No," replies the man.

The jogger reaches over to pet the dog, who promptly bites him.

"I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!" exclaims the jogger, nursing his hand.

The man looks up at the jogger and says, "I lied."


Why does no one like joggers?

They're all racists


What did the jogger say when the truck hit him at 5 am?



A jogger walks into a bar

Now his head hurts


What kind of poops do jogger have?

the runs


Samuel Adams came out with a new lager called the Boston Jogger

But I heard it bombed


What are the most funny Jogger jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Jogger? Well, here are the best Jogger dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Jogger pick up lines to share with friends.


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