Jitsu Jokes
34 jitsu jokes and hilarious jitsu puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about jitsu that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you have a sensei who loves to make jokes? Whether it's inside the dojo or outside, this article has some of the funniest jiu jitsu jokes to tell your friends and family. Read on for some of the best jiu jitsu-related jokes that are sure to make you laugh.
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Funniest Jitsu Short Jokes
Short jitsu jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The jitsu humour may include short competitors jokes also.
- My son walked in on me and my wife "wrestling" on the bed. We call it "wrestling" because he can't pronounce jiu-jitsu.
- Guys can we please begin calling Krav maga "Jew Jitsu?" I'm pretty serious about this but I don't know where to post it.
- Apparently the Israeli armed forces are trained in Krav Maga for CQC I always assumed they were taught Jew Jitsu
- Thought this up at work, prolly not funny, whatcha call it when a jew with Jiu-Jitsu skills fights you? Jewhitsyou.
- A Jewish guy starts to fight with his nose... He warns his opponent, "Careful, I nose jew-jitsu!"
- Don't mess with my Jew friend He knows jew jitsu
- What did the Jiu-Jitsu master say to the Aikido master? 'I got your back.'
- What's Anne Frank's martial art style? Jew jitsu
- What is the famous martial art of Israel? Jiu-Jitsu
- What type of Martial Arts does Jesus know? Jiu Jitsu.
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Jitsu One Liners
Which jitsu one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with jitsu? I can suggest the ones about punch and jiu jitsu.
- Which is the most kosher martial art? Jew jitsu
- What is Israel's most popular sport ? Jew-jitsu
- What do you call a rabbi who knows karate? Jiu Jitsu
- What do you call a documentary on religious ninjas? Jew Jitsu
- On the night of his betrayal, how did Jesus defend himself? Jew-Jitsu
- What kind of combat training do the recruits in the Israeli army receive? Jew-Jitsu.
- I might be the greatest jiu jitsu practitioner who ever lived ... ... in my condo unit.
- What self-defense class would Jesus take? Jew-Jitsu
- What do you call a Judaic dojo that is into black magic? A Jew Juju jiu jitsu parlor
- What is hitlers favorite sport? JEW-Jitsu
- I don't think I'm good at jiu jitsu Even my waiver got submitted
- My synagogue has started giving self defense classes. They're teaching jew jitsu.
- How do Jewish citizens defend themselves? Jew Jitsu
- How do you know the hipster knows ju jitsu? He knew that move before you did.
- My crush recently got a black belt in Jiu-Jitsu He doesn't notice me anymore...
Silly & Ridiculous Jitsu Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter
What funny jokes about jitsu you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean break jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make jitsu pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The reason the n**... never conquered Brazil
Because they all knew jew jitsu
I hear that if you draw a really good portrait of Jason Segel you will instantly be proficient in Karate, Taekwondo, and Jiu Jitsu
I think it has something to do with becoming a master Marshall artist
An old cowboy is sitting at a bar next to a young Japanese man
An old cowboy is sitting at a bar next to a young Japanese man.
The cowboy turns to the Japanese man, scowling and grunts "Hey kid, do you know King Fu or Jiu Jitsu or somewhat?
Severely offended the Japanese man says, "Just because I'm 'Oriental' doesn't mean I know Martial Arts."
The cowboy stands up and says, "No it's 'cause you're drink'in my beer."
-Credit goes to my grandpa
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What kind of karate do Rabbis know?
Jew Jitsu.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did h**... never learn to fight?
Cuz jew jitsu is inferior
There is a jiu jitsu competition to see who can break the largest board with their fist. The judge asks all competitors to stand behind the first contestant, but no one listens.
There is no punch line.
A Brazilian Jiu Jitsu teacher and black belt told his Purple belt employee,
"We're going to have a match. If you can avoid being submitted for 10 minutes, I'll award you a black belt and I'll give you a raise. If I can get you in a chokehold and you can't escape, I'm going to fire you."
The employee agreed, and they started the match. Five minutes in, the teacher locked in a chokehold, and was waiting to see if his employee could get out. The employee struggled and struggled and eventually started to turn blue.
The teacher said, finally, "I'm going to have to let you go."
