The Best 12 Jewel Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Jewel jokes. There are some jewel pews jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these jewel philately puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Jewel Jokes and Puns

A jewel thief entered a house mid-afternoon. He tied up the woman and at knife-point asked the man to hand over the jewelry and money. The man started sobbing and said, You can take anything you want. You can even pistol whip me, but please untie the rope and free her.

Thief: You must really love your wife!

Man: No, but she will be home shortly .

A teacher asks Little Johnny what he wants to be when he grows up.

"I want to be a detective and follow in my father's footsteps," says Johnny.

"That's very admirable of you," says the teacher. "I didn't even know your father was a detective."

"He's not," says Johnny. "He's a jewel thief."

A wife tells her husband her underwear cost $300...

The husband screams "Three hundred dollars!? That's outrageous!" The wife says "Well you don't wrap a beautiful jewel in newspaper".

The husband replies "Yeah, but you don't gift wrap a dead beaver, either".

Jewel joke, A wife tells her husband her underwear cost $300...

A jeweler and blacksmith gets married. What do they name their kid?

Jaden Smith

What is the difference between a failed jewel thief and a man who performed a sex change on himself?

One of them managed to pull it off.


Why didn't the jewellery store owner feel like eating?

Because they'd lost there apitite

Two jewelers saw a man get shot to death.

The first jeweler looks at the second and says, "I'm absolutely opalled!

The second just looks down and says, "I dunno man, I'm just too jaded to care."

Jewel joke, Two jewelers saw a man get shot to death.

Son, some children, before they are born, are the jewel of their mother's eye.

You, however, were the crust in the corner.

The three jewels of buddhism...

Karma, dharma and a good parmigiana

The jeweler received a new stamp kit as a birthday present

He thought it was pretty impressive.

Why did the jeweler buy weed?

Because he was a stoner

You can explore jewel scheme reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean jewel priceless dad jokes. There are also jewel puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Did you hear about the Irish jewel scam?

They got caught selling sham rocks

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the jewel earring jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working jewel emerald piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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