Jeff Jokes
106 jeff jokes and hilarious jeff puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about jeff that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article's title of "Jeff Jokes" will bring you the best of the best jokes from some of the biggest names in the comedy world. Jeff Dunham, Foxworthy, Ross, and more will have you in stitches with their unique takes on current events and outrageous one-liners. Laugh along with Jeff Dunham's hysterical rant on his Prius, Jeff Foxworthy's entertaining stories of life in Minnesota, or enjoy a roast from Jeff Ross. Plus, get to know Jenni, Evan, and Eric - the newest additions to the Jeff Dunham family. Don't miss out on these hilarious Jeff jokes!
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Funniest Jeff Short Jokes
Short jeff jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The jeff humour may include short homeowner jokes also.
- God making Adam Angel: What do you call it?
God: A human.
Angel: What does it do?
God: It doesn't annoy me, Jeff. That's what it does. - My son came to me & said: 'Can I have a book mark?' 14 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Jeff
- Bedtime with Bezos What does Jeff Bezos do before he gets into bed???
He puts his PyjAMAZON!!
SORRY - Why did Bill Gates' and Jeff Bezos' marriages both end in divorce? Because they realized they were in a union.
- If you're ever feeling down... Just remember, you're closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is!
- A man enters a party and says "Is anybody here named Jeff?" Jeff raised his hand and said "Yes."
Geoff raised his hand and said "Yeos." - How does Jeff Bezos tell his doctor that his Covid symptoms are horrible? Doc, I feel like a million bucks.
- Doctor: Don't be nervous Jeff, it's gonna be a quick surgery. Patient: But my name isn't Jeff..
Doctor: I know, it's mine. - Sometimes when I'm feeling down I like to remind myself, At least I'm closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is!
- If I had one dollar for every time someone complained about how rich Jeff Bezos is I still wouldn't be as rich as Jeff Bezos.
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Jeff One Liners
Which jeff one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with jeff? I can suggest the ones about bob and hank.
- Did you hear Jeff Bezos is buying Crunchyroll? He is renaming it to amazon Weeb Services.
- Jeff Bezos only got divorced because he realized his marriage was a union.
- "Anybody here named Jeff?" Jeff: "Yes"
Geoff: "Yeos" - What does Jeff Bezos do right before bed time? He puts his pjamazon.
- I now know why Jeff Bezos divorced with his wife... He needed space.
- Jeff, a semicolon, and an Oxford Comma walk into a bar. They both had a great time.
- Jeff Bezos stepped down as CEO of Amazon. Quit when he was in his Prime.
- Why did Jeff Bezos get divorced? He realized his marriage was a union.
- Jeff Bezos got a divorce... because he found out it was a union.
- Jeff Bezos may be richer than all of us But he still puts his pyjamazon one leg at a time
- Jeff Bezos has never been the President of Amazon. Just the Prime Minister.
- I wonder what Jeff Bezos does before he goes go to bed Probably puts his pajamazon
- Why did Jeff Bezos get divorced? He's anti-union.
- Did you hear Jeff Bezos is stepping down from Amazon? Odd, since he was in his Prime.
- is jeff here? Jeff: yes!
Geoff: Yeos!
Jeff Dunham Jokes
Here is a list of funny jeff dunham jokes and even better jeff dunham puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Two cannibals are eating Jeff Dunham. One turns to the other and says "does this taste funny?"
The other cannibal says "No". - A friend told me that laughter is the best medicine Now I understand why Jeff Dunham is so sick all the time
- I think Jeff Dunham hates ham... I mean it's in his last name. He's done with ham.
- Comedian Jeff Dunham has been accused of s**... assault One of his alegged victims says "I feel like I've been played like a puppet."
- Jeff Dunham, Achmed the dead t**...
- Five more entertainment assistants scream s**... harassment after beiing fingered by their boss... ....Jeff Dunham
Jeff Foxworthy Jokes
Here is a list of funny jeff foxworthy jokes and even better jeff foxworthy puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Women don't want to hear a man's opinion... ...They just want to hear their own in a deeper voice.
(Credit to Jeff Foxworthy) - Is Jeff really worthy of Fox? I mean really, is Jeff Foxworthy?
- In the mold of a Jeff Foxworthy joke You know you are a r**... when you think a reboot has something to do with new footwear.
Uproarious Jeff Jokes to Share with Friends
What funny jokes about jeff you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ted jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make jeff pranks.
Comedian Jeff Dunham has been accused of s**... assault
After allegations from his coworkers saying that he's been f**... them for decades.
Just look up his Youtube channel if you want to see evidence of this a**.... Millions have just sat by and watched while these poor souls suffered through tremendous pain right in-front of them.
Jeff Bezos: "Alexa, send n**... to my secret admirer."
Alexa: "Got it. Sending n**... to the National Enquirer."
What did Jeffrey d**... sing as he went to the refrigerator?
My bologna had a first name.
Why was Jeffrey d**... so healthy?
Because he ate five fruits a day!
Jeffrey d**... and his mom are having dinner.
Jeffey's mom looks over at him and says "Jeff I don't like your friends". Jeffery then replies "You can eat the potatoes".
A Chinese guy walks into a bar...
A Chinese guy walks into a bar, and sits next to Jeff, and starts drinking his beer. Jeff asks him :
• My friend, do you know any martial arts, kung fu, karate or other stuff?
• Why do you ask, is it because i'm Chinese?
• No, it's because you are drinking my beer.
Angel.
Jeff is talking to Ben :
• My wife is an angel.
Ben tells him :
• Lucky you, mine is still alive...
How did Jeffrey d**... make alphabet soup?
With 26 characters he met at a party.
How do you know if Jeffrey d**... smoked?
They found butts behind his couch.
Jeff d**... was a pretty normal guy
He was having a friend for dinner when he was arrested.
Jeffrey d**... didn't like Tic Tacs or gum.
He preferred men toes.
How come Jeff Bezos spending 13 billion makes the news?
I spent 13 billion dollars last week at Whole Foods as well and all I got was some vegan avocado toast.
What's the difference between Jeff Sessions and a book about Jeff Sessions?
The book has a spine.
Did you know Jeffrey d**... was a closet s**...?
He kept the butts behind the couch.
Did any news come out of Attorney General Jeff Sessions testimony?
I don't recall.
Why didn't Jeff Goldblum go all Liam Neeson when his wife was taken?
Because his wife cannot be contained, wife breaks free, wife
..... finds a way
Did you know Jeffrey d**... was a time traveler?
He was eating Five Guys before it was a thing.
Jeffrey d**... once sent me a dinner invitation
But the offer was a me steak.
Why did Jeff Bezos divorce his wife?
Because he found out marriages are classified as "recognized unions."
What does Jeffrey d**... eat for breakfast?
Boys and Berries
Mr Jeffries in interview
Job interviewer: And where would you see yourself in five years' time Mr. Jeffries?" - Mr. Jeffries: "Personally I believe my biggest weakness is in listening."
A man named Jeff was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him.
The officer looked in the back of Jeff's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?
Jeff replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw Jeff driving down the road once again. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, Jeff replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach."
Jeffrey d**... was eating five guys
Before it was a restaurant.
Jeff Bozos was cleaning his bedside lamp when a genie popped out.
Genie: One wish only, my good sir.
Bezos: Name it.
What is Jeff Bezos's favourite comedy show?
"Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?"
Ted Bundy and Jeffery d**... have dinner together
Ted: hey Jeff you got any ice cream in the freezer?
Jeffrey: nah, only Ben and j**...
Jeff Bezos can't sleep
until he puts his pajamazon
Do you think Jeff Bezos sleep n**...?
...or with pajamazon?
What do Jeffrey Epstein and Halloween decorations having common?
They don't hang themselves.
Happy Early Halloween!
Why did Jeffrey d**... keep a blender on his front porch?
So he could greet visitors with a handshake.
What do Jeffrey Epstein and Christmas lights have in common?
You can pay someone to hang 'em
Why did Jeff Bezos get divorced?
He found out a marriage was a union
Back when I was in elementary school one of my teachers would have a letter of the day and then pick one of the students to say something about the letter of the day.
One day I got picked and the letter of that day was N so I got asked, "Jeff, why don't you use the letter of the day, N, and tell us something that you're not very good at that starts with the letter N." I stood up next to my desk and said... Spelling
Jeff just had a pillow fight with death...
He faced the reaper-cushions
If you can say nothing else about Jeff Goldblum, you can say this.....
He's pretty fly for a white guy.
Jeffrey d**... and Armie Hammer are eating Ronald McDonald
Armie asks, "does this taste funny to you?" Jeffrey responds, "I think it's ginger."
Why did Jeff bozos get divorced?
He realized that a wedding was a union
George and Jeff watches TV
George: "Oh no, that's terrible!"
Jeff: "What happened?"
George: "An earthquake! They found 13 dead, and counting!"
Jeff: "That *is* terrible."
Jeff: "I hate counting too."
Why Amazon bought Whole Foods
Jeff Bezos: Alexa buy olives from Whole Foods
Alexa: Buying all of Whole Foods
Jeff: No Olives... Meh I can afford it go ahead.
Jeff Bezos is no longer the President of Amazon.
But he's still the Prime Minister.
A regular family dinner
Son: Mama, I saw Papa in the maids bedroom today
Pa: H-Hey now you just be quiet and eat your dinner son
Ma: Go on son...
Son: Papa took off his clothes and the maid did the same!!!
Pa: Now listen here you lying little sh--
Ma: Finish the story Son!
Son: Then Papa got on top of the maid, and wrestled each other the same way you and Uncle Jeff did!!!
Ma: Now listen here you lying little sh--
Jeffery d**... is in his kitchen, using his blender...
... when his phone goes off in his pocket. It was a notification from the CDC:
"The public is still advised to avoid direct contact from others through cordial gestures during this pandemic, such as hugs or ***handshakes.*** "
"Awwwwww..." Jeffery mopes, as he turns off his blender.
What happens when Jeff Bezo's Rocket and Richard Branson's Rocket collide?
Branson's rocket is no longer a v**......
Jeff Bezos' Advice
An Amazon employee greets Bezos shortly after his successful spaceflight and gives him a hearty congratulations. Jeff responds, "Well, if you work hard, set yourself goals and work with determination, I should be able to squeeze in 2 more flights before Christmas."
Jeff Bezos is informed about the passing away of a warehouse worker on a Sunday after working continuously for 12 hours leaving behind a wife and 2 young kids
Let's make sure his hard work and sacrifice are not wasted....
Jeff Bezos orders his subordinates
Find someone who can finish the remaining 2 hours of his shift
A short joke to cheer you up
Jeff told his friend: "I was named after my father."
His friend said: "But his name is John."
"Yes", Jeff said. "He was named that years before I was even born".
What do Jeffrey d**... and Travis Scott have in common?
Ate dead people.
Jeff Bezoz on a plane with Donald Trump
Jeff Bezoz and Donald Trump Are on a plane. Jeff says "I could drop a dollar bill to the ground and make one person happy. Donald Tump says "I could drop 100 dollar bills to the ground and make 100 people happy." . Pilot walks out of the cockpit and says "I could drop this plane to the ground and make 7 billion people happy!"
Oh, you´re surprised Jeff Epstein committed s**...?
Imagine how surprised Jeff must have been.
Apparently being so wealthy has made Jeff Bezos ill.
He's caught affluenza.
Who runs mexican Amazon?
Jeff Pesos
It's a silly joke but I thought of it on my own today! I found a 200 peso bill on the ground today and I was saying pesos in different accents out loud with a coworker when the joke popped into my head. I don't think I've heard it anywhere before. After I got home and searched it here I realised it hasn't been told this way on this subreddit yet either. So I'm claiming it as an original joke.
Jeffrey d**...'s mother was over for a visit having dinner.
She says you know Jeffrey, I really don't like your friends.
He just shrugs & says well just eat the vegetables then.
BREAKING: Jeff d**...'s former landlord arrested.
He used to charge an arm and a leg for rent.
Jeff Bezos is just a bad Santa.
He has drones, our addresses and our wishlist, yet he refuses to do his duty.
why did Jeffrey d**... never eat liver and onions?
He didn't like onions.
Jeffrey Epstein, Prince Andrew, and the Dalai Lama walk into a bar....
Bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve underage here."