jed Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious jed puns

Three old cowboys...

Frank, Raph, and Jed had just finished their supper by the camp fire and broke out the jug of whiskey. Passing around the jug, they started bragging about their dangerous escapades throughout their lives. Frank says, "I remember one time I was crossing a stream and a 12 foot grizzly bear that was fishing for trout attacked me. I wrestled with that bear for three hours before I finally was able to draw my knife and kill it." "Aw, that's nuthin'" says Raph, "once when I was ridin' across the prairie, my horse stumbled in a gopher hole and I fell off into a draw plumb full of diamondback rattlesnakes. I started shootin' em in the head, fast as I could till I ran outta bullets. Then when they'd strike, I'd grab em and bite their heads off." Jed just stood there stokin' the fire with his penis.


Redneck son Jedidiah returns from college for the summer

He hops on a plane and arrives at the airport where his dad is waiting on him.

Daddy: Hey, Jed! Good to have ya back in town.

Jedidiah: Glad to be back, daddy.

Daddy: So tell me. What did ya learn there at college?

Jed racks his brain and decides on his memory.

Jedidiah: Pi r^2

Daddy: What are they teaching you in college? Pie are round!


Steve, Bruce and Jed are working on a telephone tower, when Steve falls off and is killed instantly.

As the ambulance takes the body away, Bruce says, "Someone should go and tell his wife."

Jed says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."

Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of beer.

Bruce says, "Where did you get that, Jed?"

"Steve's wife gave it to me," Jed replies.

"That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?"

Well, not exactly", Jed says. "When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Steve's widow'."

She said, "No, I'm not a widow!"

And I said, "I'll bet you a case of beer you are.


The Story of Jed

There was once a man named Jed, who had grown tired of the may-may culture. But he was at work in the engineering yard, and couldn't just turn off his computer or hide it. This was not the first time he had grown angry with it, and the last time he had destroyed his computer in a rage, so it was now replaced with a reinforced chassis for when he got angry. So he just drank a Mountain Dew for energy, took off his belt and began whipping his reinforced computer. His boss heard the noise and came to stop him. His boss told him "Even Jed fueled can't belt steel memes."


So two farmers were talking . . .

and Jed says to Zeb, "So, what are yeh going to do fer yer vacation this year?"

"Wall," says Zeb, "I figger I'll try somethin' different this year."

"What d'yeh mean different?"

"Wall, remember three years ago when I went to Disneyworld? My wife Earline got pregnant."

"Yep, I remember," says Jed.

"And then the next year I went to Vegas. And Earline got pregnant again."


"And then last year I went to New Orleans. And dang if Earline didn't get pregnant again!"

"Yep," says Jed. "So what're y'all gonna do different this year?"

Zeb says, "This year I'm takin' Earline with me!"


What are the most funny Jed jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Jed? Well, here are the best Jed dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Jed pick up lines to share with friends.


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