The Best 42 Java Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Java jokes. There are some java software jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these java java programming puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Java Jokes and Puns

Why do java developers always wear eyeglasses?

Because they dont C#

Why do java coders wear glasses?

Because they don't C#

To follow up on the Java/C# joke...

Q: Why did the Java Developer quit his job?

A: Because he didn't get arrays.

Java joke, To follow up on the Java/C# joke...

The IT department hates me

I finish my delicious cup of morning coffee and kindly let them know "I successfully downloaded java again!"

I felt so good when I woke up today

that I even let Java install its update.

Coffee maker in the IT department doesn't work

Try reinstalling Java.

Why do Java developers have bad eyesight?

Because they can't C#

Java joke, Why do Java developers have bad eyesight?

Air Asia Accident - java reference

So some remains of the Air Asia Airline were found in the Java sea.
Guess the pilot didnt C#.

Opera Mini 8 for Java and BlackBerry phones

After I drink coffee I show my empty mug

to the IT guy and tell him I've successfully installed Java.

He hates me.

Why can't Java programmers see well?

Because of the eclipse

You can explore java python reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean java int dad jokes. There are also java puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

After I drink coffee I like to show the empty mug to my friends...

We work in IT and I tell them that I have successfully installed JAVA. They kind-of hate me.

I'm trying to teach my cat Java programming...

But he keeps complaining about a NullLaserPointerException.

Why are Communists bad Java programmers?

They don't like classes.

What's the difference between Java and JavaScript?

Java and JavaScript are similar in the same way car and carpet are.

Why do Java programmers need glasses?

Because they can't C#.

Java joke, Why do Java programmers need glasses?

What does it sound like when Java laughs?

Java -jar jar.jar

My university just announced a Computer Science exchange program with an Indonesian university

I'm really excited for the courses in Java

A computer programmer was asked if he used Java or something else.

After a short pause, he replied "Yes."

I'm old fashioned when it comes to coffee. If someone offers me a hot cup of java, I say no thanks.

I'd much prefer a cup of C++.

I made a java program to tell me my purpose.

It keeps saying "Null point exception", so it works great.

How do you describe a thick girl who codes Java and Ruby?

"baby got back-end"

Why is my computer so slow in the morning?

It hasn't had its cup of Java yet.

What's the difference between a normal intern and a tech intern?

One gets people coffee, and the other sends Java programs

Why do blind programmers use Java?

Because they can't C.

(I'm so sorry.)

What does C++ say to the Java?

You had me at "Hello World"

A zombie walks into a brain store

On the shelves, a pound of C++ programmers' brain sells for $500, of Java programmers, $1000, and of PHP programmers, $1,000,000. The zombie gets confused and asks the store owner why PHP programmers' brain is so much more expensive. The owner says "do you know how many PHP programmers I kill to get one pound of brain?"

Why do JavaScripters wear glasses?

Because they don't C#

Why did the javascript programmer need glasses?

Because he couldn't C#

What do programmers say when surprised?

By Java!


I thought it was coffee break...

... when I saw "Java Script" on schedule.

Then I realize it was Speech n Drama.

There was this guy who asked me, "how do I open this jar?!"

"Install the latest version of the Java Runtime Environment", I said. Silly guy, now he's all confused. People these days... SMH.

Why does 2 ^ 3 = 1?

Because JavaScript was designed by heretics.

Why do programmers make terrible dates?

They take you out for Java and try to get you to bed.
To make matters worse, their skills in the bedroom is pretty BASIC so they only ever get a C++ rating.

My son finally landed a position as a software engineer. He proudly told me that his new job title will be Java Developer.

I didn't have the heart to tell him that means he'll be making the coffee.

JavaScript is a lot like English;

No one knows how to use semicolons properly.

I heard wired connections are faster...

So I poured some coffee on my router and now it's even slower...Do I need a another java update?

If i create a Java class public Class Woman{}

Am I objectifying women?

Why does Java programmers always wear glasses?

Because they don't C#

Hey girl, are you a Java compiler?

Because when I proposed a Date, you said I wasn't your type.

Java is the most misogynistic programming language in existence

It thinks women are objects

What do you drink when you program?

A cup of java.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the java bracket jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working java errors piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes