JokoJokes

Janitor Jokes

111 janitor jokes and hilarious janitor puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about janitor that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Get ready to laugh at these funny janitor jokes from Jimmy the Janitor. From good hearted janitorial tips, to maid jokes, to Yale's housekeeper, you're sure to have a good time. Enjoy!

Quick Jump To

Funniest Janitor Short Jokes

Short janitor jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The janitor humour may include short housekeeper jokes also.

  1. What Did the Janitor Say When He Jumped Out of the Closet? "Supplies!"
    I'll see myself out
  2. I went to the pet store to buy a Dalmatian, but they didn't have any. Their janitor keeps the store spotless.
  3. The janitor couldn't remember where he put the floor polisher As a programmer, this isn't the first time I encountered a 'buffer allocation failure due to memory error'
  4. The janitor had trouble with his broom After days of frustration he went to his boss and demanded sweeping reforms
  5. My father who is a janitor said his position at work was raised He will be cleaning the 40th floor instead of the 39th.
  6. Did you hear about the janitor who suffocated in a row of turds? He died in the line of doody.
  7. A Hollywood janitor decided to try his hand at directing He's billing himself as "the director who swept the Oscars"
  8. A janitor gets accepted into Nascar His car goes "Broom, Broom"
  9. What do you call a janitor in space? A vacuum cleaner
  10. One of the janitor ladies at my work wanted to smoke a joint after work I politely declined, I can't handle high maintenance women

Share These Janitor Jokes With Friends




Janitor One Liners

Which janitor one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with janitor? I can suggest the ones about cleaner and repairman.

  1. How warm is a janitor's closet? Broom Temperature.
  2. A janitor, a waitress, and a bartender walk into a bar. Then they open for the day.
  3. What did the janitor say when he came out of the closet? Supplies!
  4. Why was the janitor late? He overswept
  5. What do you call the janitors of the CIA? Sweeper Agents
  6. I saw two janitors making out And I said hey, get a broom!
  7. A movie about janitors impressed critics. Later that year the movie swept the Oscars.
  8. Why did the janitor get fired from the bank? Because he cleaned out the vault.
  9. I just watched my friend sweep a woman off her feet. He's a really aggressive janitor.
  10. Where do janitors go at night? They go to sweep.
  11. I just swept a girl off her feet. I'm quite an aggressive janitor.
  12. have you heard about the janitor that died? yeah, he kicked the bucket
  13. What does a janitor yell when he jumps out of the closet? Supplies!
  14. Harvard University accepted my application! I'm going to be their best janitor!
  15. How does the ghost of a janitor communicate with the living world? Squeegee board

Good Janitor Jokes

Here is a list of funny good janitor jokes and even better good janitor puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • They say a good woman will cook and clean for you. That's why i married a part time Chef and a full-time janitor
  • Hey is Johannes Kepler such a good janitor? Because he sweeps out the same area every night.
    Credit to my Physics teacher.
  • Why did the Warriors become Janitors? They're good at sweeping
  • Why would Rip Van Winkle make a good janitor? Because he swept for 20 years.
  • How is the Janitor daughter called? Janifer. She smells so good.
Janitor joke, How is the Janitor daughter called?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about janitor can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of janitor puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Cheeky Janitor Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle

What funny jokes about janitor you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean maintenance man jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make janitor prank.

The female janitor at my building asked if I would chill and smoke some w**... with her

I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women

A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy.

The fairy says "I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else's job for a day."
The professor says "I'll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read?" so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the kids' screaming gets to his nerves, so he throws all his supplies and gives up.
The C.E.O says "I'll be a waiter. All you do is carry food back and forth. This'll be a breeze" so he is teleported to a restaurant. After about an hour, all the annoying customers drive him insane, so he smashes his plates on the ground and gives up.
The janitor says "I'll be an artist" so he is transported to an art facility. He glues all the classroom supplies and shattered plates to a canvas, then sells it for a billion dollars. The fairy asks the janitor how he was so clever.
The janitor says "I got a masters degree in art."

What did the janitor get for his birthday?

A u**... cake.

A men calls the hotel reception

He tells the manager, "I need help, my ex-wife is trying to jump out of the window", the manager replies "Do you want me to send a psychologist?", the men says "No, send the janitor, the window is stuck!"

What did h**... call his janitor?

Mein Sweeper

Why did the janitor flush the toilet?

Because it was his duty.

A man asks a janitor in his office...

"Hey, don't you get tired being just a janitor?"
The janitor is taken aback. "Excuse me, let me tell you that even if I'm just a janitor, I have a kid each in Harvard, MIT, and Princeton."
"Wow," the man is surprised, "what courses are they taking?"
"Nah, they're janitors too."

How Did the Janitor Get Rich?

Sweepstakes.

Who was the first black person accepted into Harvard University?

The Janitor

A man walks into a job interview...

He sits down on a chair, and the interviewer starts questioning him.
"So son, where did you receive your education?"
The man replied "Yale".
The interviewer, pleasantly surprised, says "Yale? Hard to believe you went to Yale to become a janitor. So what's your name?"
The man replied "Yack Yackson".

A janitor, a security guard, and a CEO are sitting at table with a dozen Twinkies.

The CEO grabs 11 Twinkies for himself, turns to the security guard and says: "Watch out for the janitor, he wants part of your t**...."

I called up my janitor the other day...

to see what he could do about my dingy linoleum floor. He said he would have been happy to loan me a polisher, but that he hadn't the slightest idea what he had done with it.
I told him not to worry about it - that as a programmer it wasn't the first time I had experienced a buffer allocation failure due to a memory error.

If I work as a janitor at an office, does that mean that every time I change a lightbulb I climb the corporate ladder?

Why did the janitor file for a divorce?

He found his wife sweeping with someone else.

What do you get when you give a janitor a joint?

A high maintenance building.

What does the aquarium janitor use to clean?

She uses all-porpoise cleaner!

Disturbing Pattern of Suicides

When some scientists plotted the number of suicides per year, they discovered a curious pattern. Every four years, there would be a spike in the number.
This baffled them, until the old janitor said: "Perhaps it was not a good idea to call them leap years."

Monkey Business

A zookeeper notices the lonely female gorilla is feeling depressed and needs to cheer her up again. He asks the r**... janitor of the zoo if he'll have s**... with the gorilla for $500.
The r**... says that he'll do it under 2 conditions.
Ok, says the zookeeper, what are they?
I don't want anyone to ever find out.
Ok, done! What's your second condition?
The r**... says; "I'll need an extra week to come up with the five hundred dollars."

My school janitor is a part-time pianist.

He has 88 keys.

What did the skeleton say to the janitor?

Suh dude

I would like to work as a janitor in Microsoft.

I could see myself excel in that job.

What's the difference between a pig and a dwarf janitor?

One is messy, and the other is a little cleaner.

A woman walks in on the janitor using the women's washroom...

"What are you doing in here?"
"The men's room is filthy"

A Janitor starts up his car.

"Broom broom"

SpaceX announced today that they are removing the astronaut janitor position from their first manned flight to Mars

There just isn't enough room in the ship for a vacuum cleaner.

The School Janitor

Janitor: I know im just a school janitor, but my eldest son is in M.I.T., his younger brother in Princeton, and my youngest in Harvard.
Student: (amazed) Wow, what are they studying?
Janitor: Oh no, they are janitors as well.

Just because I'm below grade average and my family is poor, doesn't mean I won't be applying to colleges

There's bound to be one college with an opening position as a janitor.

What did the German janitor say when asked if his 11 AM appointment was outdoors?

Nein! Eleven was an inside job.

The janitor at the bank managed to rob 21 million dollars.

He made a clean getaway!

When a girl sleeps with girls in college, she's "experimenting"

When I do it, I'm "fired" and "a terrible dorm janitor"

What do you call a janitor who smokes w**...?

High maintenance.

Why did the janitor with a speech impediment miss his shift?

He overswept

What do you call a gangster janitor?

A mopster

What's another name for a space janitor?

A vacuum cleaner.

Why was the janitor late?

He over swept

The gym teacher gets a handgun, the janitor gets a shot gun, and the principal gets an u**.... What do they arm the lunch lady with?

A salt rifle

Never get in a fight with a Janitor...

Unless you want your clock cleaned.

A caveman walks into an auditorium

He sits down in the front row and a janitor walks by. The janitor turns to the caveman and says, "Hey, the anthropology lecture doesn't start for another hour. You're early, man."

"Art is the elimination of the unnecessary" -Pablo picasso

"Sure thing Pablo, but must people just call me the janitor" - Art

What did the Chinese janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

SUPPRISE!

I have a friend who's half Portuguese and half Jewish

He's a janitor, but the building is his.

The janitor lady in our apartment building wanted me to hang out with her and smoke p**.... I said no.

I tend to avoid high maintenance women.

The janitor at my work asked if I wanted to take a five minute break to go smoke w**... with her.

I told her, 'No, I'm sorry, but I don't have time for a high maintainance woman."

What did the janitor yell when he jumped out of the cupboard?

SUPPLIES!

People always ask me how I got into Harvard at the age of 16, after skipping two grades.

Honestly I think the janitor just left the door open or something.

Why did the janitor die?

He kicked the bucket

Right after I got my PhD in theoretical physics, I was able to land a job at Stanford!

My first shift starts tomorrow, after the senior janitor gives me a quick rundown.

I once broke a toilet in front of a janitor.

He was very angry, replying, "Ur in for it now!"

Why should you vote a janitor into public office?

If you want them to make sweeping changes.

What does a Janitor have in common with Santa Claus?

Leave out some cookies for them and you'll receive better treatment.

Being a janitor doesn't leave you smelling great

It adds a whole new meaning to eau de toilette

It's not right to assume that a janitor can clean your chimney.

You shouldn't make sweeping generalizations.

What do you call a live in janitor?

A broomate.

Young man fresh out of college gets a job at a factory

When he arrives he surprised that he is assigned as junior janitor. Shocked he asks for the manager who hired him. Didn't you read I have a double major in Social Science and Anthropology
Oh says the man, I must have missed that. OK let me explain. Lift the mop up and put in the bucket, then wipe the dirty floor with it.

My dad works at Microsoft!

He's a Janitor

The janitor of my apartment building asked if I wanted to smoke some w**... with her

I told her no. I can't stand high maintenance women.

Harvard University

I guess my dream is finally coming true. Among many people who applied for Harvard University,they chose me to be the janitor.

The female janitor in my building asked if I would smoke some w**... with her.

I said no; I can't deal with high maintenance women.

A guy's wife was spending a lot of time with the janitor, turns out his suspicions were correct.

He was sweeping with his wife.

The Janitor jumped out of the closet and yelled...

... Supplies!

A janitor at my work offered me to come over and smoke w**... with her..

I said no, sorry I can't stand high maintenance women.

Two monks werewere discussing humility.

"I have been praying and fasting, meditating and studying religion for 20 years. I have finally reached the level of humility. I am truly a nothing." said one monk.
The other monk nodded gravely. "I too have spent my life devoted to serving God. I am also a nothing."
At that moment a janitor passed, holding his mop. Overhearing the conversation, and feeling quite spiritual, he interrupted. "You know what, i am also a nothing."
The monks looked away in disgust. "Who the h**... does he think he is to be a nothing???"

Janitor joke, Two monks werewere discussing humility.

jokes about janitor

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these janitor jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.