Jam Jokes
168 jam jokes and hilarious jam puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about jam that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh until you jam with this hilarious collection of jokes about traffic jams, space jams, Pearl Jams, jelly and jams, toe jams, strawberry jams, and Monster Jams! Don't forget the jokes about donuts, cram, and raspberries as well!
Quick Jump To
Funniest Jam Short Jokes
Short jam jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The jam humour may include short donuts jokes also.
- Pearl Jam tried to warn us about Ticketmaster in the Nineties. We didn't listen. Probably because we couldn't understand what Eddie Vedder was saying.
- What's the difference between jelly and jam? Santa doesn't jelly himself down the chimney on Christmas Eve.
- I had to check my printer because I thought I heard music coming from it. It was the paper jamming.
- Why did the ants wait until the bear's favourite song came on before stealing his jelly? Because nobody would understand what was going on when he yelled "YO! THAT'S MY JAM!"
- What does one strawberry say to the other? "Well, if you hadn't been so fresh last night, we wouldn't have ended up in this jam!"
- A bus carrying a jazz band has broke down on the highway Witnesses are reporting a massive jam
- What did the accordion player say when he got to heaven? “I hope there’s an eternal jam session up here!”
- What did the therapist counsel the jar of jam to do? "if you'd only open up, people would realize how sweet you were."
- I really like cooking fruit with sugar. I know many people disagree with me. But that's my jam!
- Lebron James is going to be in Space Jam 2 It's going to be really weird when Lebron quits the Tune Squad and joins up with the Monstars midway through the movie
Share These Jam Jokes With Friends
Jam One Liners
Which jam one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with jam? I can suggest the ones about traffic jam and pearl jam.
- What do you call it when two giraffes run into each other? A giraffic jam
- What do you call a traffic jam in Compton? A blood clot
- Why did the man smear peanut butter on the road? To go with the traffic jam.
- Why are old printers so musical? Because they are prone to jamming.
- What do cars eat on their toast? Traffic Jam.
- I always keep my guitar in my car It's good for traffic jams
- Why was the baby strawberry crying? Her mom was in a jam
- I love the sound of traffic. It's my jam
- What's a husband's favorite Karwa Chauth song? "Hunger Strike" by Pearl Jam!
- What do you call a group of cars playing instruments? A Traffic Jam
- What do aliens spread on their toast? Space jam.
- When pearl jam comes on and you're like... It doesn't get Eddie Vedder than this
- Based on Lebron's acting skills, I suspect Space Jam 2... Will be a flop.
- Why were the ants dancing on top of the jar of jam? It said "twist to open"
- I recently learned how to store jam properly. I must say, it was a rather jarring event.
Traffic Jam Jokes
Here is a list of funny traffic jam jokes and even better traffic jam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you hear about the truck full of blueberries that crashed on the highway? It caused a traffic jam.
- Why are cars called Sweet Rides? Traffic Jams
- Whats the worst kind of jam for breakfast? Traffic jam
- What's on a toast that got run over by a car? Traffic Jam
- An 18-wheeler spilled a load of strawberry preserves on the interstate today It was a real traffic jam
- What do you call a straight pride parade? A traffic jam.
- Why do they call it a traffic jam? Because no one's jelly
- How do you get musical traffic? You put a jam in it!
- Did you hear? Smuckers and Ford are getting together?They're gonna make traffic jam
- What do they call a traffic jam in the Lincoln Tunnel? A Linkin Park.
Strawberry Jam Jokes
Here is a list of funny strawberry jam jokes and even better strawberry jam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What did the strawberry say to the other strawberry? It's your fault we're in this jam
- Why did the strawberry cross the road? Because his buddy was in a jam.
- Why couldn't the strawberry shoot it's gun? Because it was jammed
- A lorry carrying 300kg of strawberries crashed into a lorry carrying 50kg of sugar. Instead of helping clear up the accident cars drove through the mess and the jam was getting thicker!
- Why was Mr. Strawberry sad? He was in a Jam.
- I left my house and noticed the door wouldn't close because it kept hitting a container of strawberry jam Guess you could say the door was held ajar
- How do you call a bunch of strawberries playing the guitar? A jam session.
- I was being chased by a criminal but thankfully I had some strawberry spread I was able to jam the door shut
- Why were the little strawberries upset? Because their parents where stuck in a jam!
- Did you hear about the strawberry jam and grape jelly hooking up? They got marmalaid.
Jelly And Jam Jokes
Here is a list of funny jelly and jam jokes and even better jelly and jam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's the difference between jam and jelly? There's no such thing as a jamfish.
- I made a suitcase out of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It's jam packed.
- Your Mother and I are like peanut butter and jelly She spreads and I jam
- What's the difference between squash and zucchini? You can't zucchini bugs!
A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke. - What is a printer's favorite type of jelly? Jelly's fine, but paper jam is the best!
- Dont butter the WronG LoAF! Why cant Mom toast have be with Son Toast?
....
Then they will be InBread
And would be in quite the jam
The father would get jelly
So just loaf your siblings out of it. - I used to love honey so much I would substitute it for the jelly in my PP&J. That stuff was my jam.
- How to get out of ANY jam. Switch to jelly.
- I stole a jar of jelly from a friend... While I was blasting some Daft Punk. He chases me down yelling "That's my jam!"
- What do you call jelly flavored Go-Gurt that you eat in your car during rush hour? Traffic Jam.
Jam And Jelly Jokes
Here is a list of funny jam and jelly jokes and even better jam and jelly puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's the difference between jam and jelly? I don't get jelly when your mom talks to other dudes
Space Jam Jokes
Here is a list of funny space jam jokes and even better space jam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A joke my 4 year old nephew made up. (It makes no sense, but still made me laugh.) If the three legged turtle crosses the road what color is the rabbit?
Green! Because Space Jam was a good movie. - What does Michael Jordan like to put on his toast for breakfast? Space Jam
- What do you call an astronaut who is crushed in space? Space Jam
- What does a Astronaut that likes to play Basketball eat for Breakfast Space Jam
I hope this hasn't been posted yet - Why didn't Chris Hadfield play guitar with the hobo? Cause he didn't have space to jam in.
- You know what would make Space Jam a good movie? Lebron James
- 23 and Me An alternate title for Space Jam
- So a fashionable rainbow drinker took up a career in basketball... she was the Sylph Of Space Jam
Jam Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about jam you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jelly and jam jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make jam pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The traffic jam in Russia.
There is a massive traffic jam somewhere in Russia. A driver sits idling in his car.
Suddenly a man approaches and knocks on his window.
The driver rolls down the window and asks "What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped Putin and are asking for a 20 million rubel ransom!
Otherwise, they are going to douse him in gasoline and set him on fire!"
The man continues "We are going from car to car taking up a collection."
The driver asks "Okay, how much is everyone else giving?"
The man replies "Oh, about a gallon or so."
Oh No! Not ELON!
Man is driving along the freeway when he is stopped by a huge traffic jam.
After sitting there for quite a long time, he sees another man walking from car-to-car.
The second man finally gets up to his car. He rolls down the window....
"Hey man, what's going on up ahead?"
"It's awful! Terrorists have stopped Elon Musk's limo! They are saying if they don't get $10 million dollars, they are going to burn him alive! So, I'm out here collecting donations."
"That's terrible! How much have you collected so far?"
"Ten gallons. But everyone else is still siphoning...."
A man is stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington DC.
The traffic is stopped for miles ahead.
Another man walks up next to him and says, "Sir, terrorists have kidnapped every member of congress. If they don't get $100,000,000 in ransom, they will to cover them in gasoline and burn them. I'm here to collect donations."
The man asks, "how much do most people donate?"
"About a gallon."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man stucks in a traffic jam in US
He sees a foreign man is coming towards him. Foreign man comes and says:
– Terrorists captured Trump, we are collecting donations. If $10.000.000 hasn't given in 1 hour, they will burn him with gasoline.
– How much people donate usually?
– Around 5 gallons.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the road
Suddenly, a man knocks on the window.
The driver rolls down the window and asks,"What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped all the politicians , and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom.
Otherwise, they're going to douse them all in petrol and set them on fire. We're going from car to car, collecting donations".
"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks...
The man replies, "Roughly 2 litres."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
ISIS takes Congress hostage
A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC.
Nothing was moving.
Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire."
"We are going from car to car, collecting donations."
"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks.
The man replies, "Roughly a gallon."
Three old farts talking
Three very elderly men are discussing their medical woes.
The 70-year-old says,
\- I have an awful time with my bladder. I have to go all the time, and sometimes it comes on pretty suddenly."
The 80-year-old says,
\- It's my bowels. Hardly any control at all. Always having to jam this walker to full speed."
The 90-year-old retorts,
\- I've got it all over you guys. Bladder works find, 7 AM like clockwork. Bowels at eight. Everything works like it order. Long pause;
\- I only wish I could wake up before noon.
Truck full of fruit crashes on highway...
Creates jam.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
To the person who found a p**... of marmalade at a Foo Fighters concert last year
That's my jam
I don't like peanut butter...
it just isn't my jam.
Have you heard of the peanut butter song?
It's my jam.
A guitarist met a bassist and they had a jam...
After a while, the bassist stopped and said:
"That is very good and all, but why won't you play A?"
The guitarist replied "because 440 Hz"
Spreading stuff on toast?
That's my jam.
What did the jam say to the bread after the failure of their relationship?
"Your deserve butter."
You're hungry. In the fridge there is a bag of bread, jar of jam, a can of tuna, and some milk. To answer the riddle, what do you open first?
This thread!
What Do You Call it When Printers Have a Party?
A paper jam
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a r**... jelly?
A slow jam.
Why doesn't bob marley eat PB&J sandwiches?
Because he's more of a jam man.
Why was the guitar late for work?
He got caught in a jam.
Why couldn't the grape help his friend move on Saturday?
because he was in a jam
What is Beethoven's favorite record label?
Def Jam Records
My printer just told me it was joining a band
Which makes sense.
It loves to jam.
What do you call it when two dinosaurs run into each other?
A Jurassic jam.
Printer jam
Why couldn't the incontinent person print?
They couldn't Ctrl-P
Pearl Jam just came out with a product that regulates women's periods
They're calling it Even Flow
On my first day working for TSA we searched a neat, sandwich shaped suitcase.
It was jam packed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the worst jelly to put on your sandwich?
Traffic Jam
**My daughter read me this from her Gogurt wrapper. My answer was Toe Jam.
Why was the window dancing?
...because of the door jam!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Pearl Jam have had to cancel some gigs in Europe after Eddie Vedder experienced some issues with his t**....
The band tried to source a temporary replacement vocalist, but they can't find a better man.
I don't like jam
but my marmite
Note : Girlfriend was determined this was a good joke, I thought it was trash. You decide.
I really love fruit spread...
That's my jam!
You know when people muddle berries and preserve them with sugar?
That's my jam.
Breaking News - Devon and Cornwall Music Festival
The Devon and Cornwall Music Festival due to take place this weekend has had to be cancelled. They couldn't decide who to put on first, The Jam or Cream
I was visiting a jam factory the other day,
They asked me if I had heard of any of the new techniques being used to grow berries. I told them that I wasn't up to date on my currant events.
Peanut butter was driving his toast when suddenly...
..there was a jam
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Response To The s**... "What's The Difference Between Jam And Jelly Joke" Reposted Every Second Day
Your mama must have fed you jelly, 'cause jam don't shake like that.
What did the peons at the jam factory say when asked if they needed to use the loo?
"No time for loos, sir,
'Cause we are the jam peons!"
Never ask an undertaker for something to get you out of a jam in a hurry.
They always give you the last thing you need.
"I'd like to have a toast" said the father-in-law at his daughters wedding
"Add some jam on it," he continued
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I like my enemies like I like my jam.
On the end of a knife.
I was her bread, she was my jam
One day she left me saying "you deserve butter".
What's an oyster's favorite band?
Pearl Jam.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a Swedish jam band and slam dunking a baby?
One's a Swedish Phish and the other's a fetus swish
Managed to drop one of the classics today.
Wife and Daughter are sat watching something while I'm doing the Tesco shop on my phone. - Strawberry jam is on the list, I seize my moment
Y'know what i say
- now I think about it…. I like strawberry jam… and I like blackberry jam … but I don't like lemon preserve
That just a curd to me
Priceless!!!
There was a seventies and scones music festival being hosted in South West England but organisers had a problem.
They couldn't decide whether to put The Jam or Cream on first.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did anyone know what happened to that passion fruit truck c**... yesterday?
It caused traffic jam.
Give a man some jam and he can enjoy a nice piece of toast
Teach a man to jam and his Phish cover band will ruin your wedding
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between Jam and Jelly?
Jam is made from crushed, pureed fruit and Jelly is made from fruit juice that gels when cooked.
What'd you think I was gonna say? Get your head out of the gutter.
What does the band Pearl Jam say when they're discouraged?
Ugh, we're not getting Eddy Vetter!
