The Best 90 Jam Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Jam jokes. There are some jam marmite jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these jam jammy puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Jam Jokes and Puns

What do you call it when two giraffes run into each other?

A giraffic jam

A man is stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington DC.

The traffic is stopped for miles ahead.
Another man walks up next to him and says, "Sir, terrorists have kidnapped every member of congress. If they don't get $100,000,000 in ransom, they will to cover them in gasoline and burn them. I'm here to collect donations."
The man asks, "how much do most people donate?"
"About a gallon."


Mama mole, papa mole, and baby mole all lived in a hole. One day, mama mole stuck her head out and sniffed the air.

"That's weird, I smell grape jelly."

Papa mole squeezes up beside her, sniffs around, and says, "That's funny, because i smell strawberry jam."

Baby mole wanted to sniff the air too, but was stuck behind mama and papa mole, so he said "That's strange, all I smell is molasses!"

What do you call a traffic jam in Compton?

A blood clot

A man stucks in a traffic jam in US

He sees a foreign man is coming towards him. Foreign man comes and says:

– Terrorists captured Trump, we are collecting donations. If $10.000.000 hasn't given in 1 hour, they will burn him with gasoline.

– How much people donate usually?

– Around 5 gallons.

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the road

Suddenly, a man knocks on the window.
The driver rolls down the window and asks,"What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped all the politicians , and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom.
Otherwise, they're going to douse them all in petrol and set them on fire. We're going from car to car, collecting donations".

"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks...

The man replies, "Roughly 2 litres."

Why did the man smear peanut butter on the road?

To go with the traffic jam.

ISIS takes Congress hostage

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC.

Nothing was moving.

Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's going on?"

"Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire."

"We are going from car to car, collecting donations."

"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks.

The man replies, "Roughly a gallon."

What do cars eat on their toast?

Traffic Jam.

Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Her mom was in a jam

I love the sound of traffic.

It's my jam

You can explore jam raspberries reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean jam strawberries dad jokes. There are also jam puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why did the ants wait until the bear's favourite song came on before stealing his jelly?

Because nobody would understand what was going on when he yelled "YO! THAT'S MY JAM!"

What does one strawberry say to the other?

"Well, if you hadn't been so fresh last night, we wouldn't have ended up in this jam!"

A bus carrying a jazz band has broke down on the highway

Witnesses are reporting a massive jam

What do you call a group of cars playing instruments?

A Traffic Jam

Why was the strawberry sad?

His mom was in a jam!

What did the therapist counsel the jar of jam to do?

"if you'd only open up, people would realize how sweet you were."

Based on Lebron's acting skills, I suspect Space Jam 2...

Will be a flop.

When pearl jam comes on and you're like...

It doesn't get Eddie Vedder than this

I recently learned how to store jam properly.

I must say, it was a rather jarring event.

Why were the ants dancing on top of the jar of jam?

It said "twist to open"

I really like cooking fruit with sugar.

I know many people disagree with me. But that's my jam!

What did the one strawberry say to the other?

If you weren't so fresh, we wouldn't be in this jam!

Truck full of fruit crashes on highway...

Creates jam.

Lebron James is going to be in Space Jam 2

It's going to be really weird when Lebron quits the Tune Squad and joins up with the Monstars midway through the movie

To the person who found a pot of marmalade at a Foo Fighters concert last year

That's my jam

I don't like peanut butter...

it just isn't my jam.

Have you heard of the peanut butter song?

It's my jam.

A joke my 4 year old nephew made up. (It makes no sense, but still made me laugh.)

If the three legged turtle crosses the road what color is the rabbit?
Green! Because Space Jam was a good movie.

A guitarist met a bassist and they had a jam...

After a while, the bassist stopped and said:

"That is very good and all, but why won't you play A?"

The guitarist replied "because 440 Hz"

What did the strawberry say to the other strawberry?

It's your fault we're in this jam

Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Because their mum and dad was in a jam.

Why did the printer start playing music?

There was a paper jam

Why did the strawberry cross the road?

Because his buddy was in a jam.

Spreading stuff on toast?

That's my jam.

What did the jam say to the bread after the failure of their relationship?

"Your deserve butter."

You're hungry. In the fridge there is a bag of bread, jar of jam, a can of tuna, and some milk. To answer the riddle, what do you open first?

This thread!

Did you hear about the truck full of blueberries that crashed on the highway?

It caused a traffic jam.

What Do You Call it When Printers Have a Party?

A paper jam

Why was the young strawberry crying?

His parents were in a jam.

Why doesn't Bob Marley eat PB&J sandwiches?

Because he's more of a jam man.

Why was the strawberry sad?

Because her mother was in a jam.

Why was the young strawberry upset?

Cause his mom was in a jam. :(

Why was the guitar late for work?

He got caught in a jam.

A lorry carrying 300kg of strawberries crashed into a lorry carrying 50kg of sugar.

Instead of helping clear up the accident cars drove through the mess and the jam was getting thicker!

My printer just told me it was joining a band

Which makes sense.

It loves to jam.

What do you call it when two dinosaurs run into each other?

A Jurassic jam.

Printer jam

Why couldn't the incontinent person print?

They couldn't Ctrl-P

What do you call a retarded jelly?

A slow jam.

On my first day working for TSA we searched a neat, sandwich shaped suitcase.

It was jam packed.

Why was the little strawberry crying?

Because his mom was in a jam.

How does Bob Marley like his biscuits?

Wit jam in?

Pearl Jam just came out with a product that regulates women's periods

They're calling it Even Flow

What's the worst jelly to put on your sandwich?

Traffic Jam

**My daughter read me this from her Gogurt wrapper. My answer was Toe Jam.

I don't like jam

but my marmite

Note : Girlfriend was determined this was a good joke, I thought it was trash. You decide.

What's the difference between squash and zucchini?

You can't zucchini bugs!

A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.

I was visiting a jam factory the other day,

They asked me if I had heard of any of the new techniques being used to grow berries. I told them that I wasn't up to date on my currant events.

What do astrounauts put in their toasts?

Space jam.

Why did the strawberry cross the road?

There was a traffic jam.

Why was the little strawberry sad?

Her mommy was in a jam.

[NSFW] What's the difference between jam and jelly?

Jam has less sugar and contains both the juice and flesh of the fruit, whereas Jelly contains only the juice and a gelatain agent for firming.

Why couldn't the grape help his friend move on Saturday?

because he was in a jam

A Response To The Stupid "What's The Difference Between Jam And Jelly Joke" Reposted Every Second Day

Your mama must have fed you jelly, 'cause jam don't shake like that.

Never ask an undertaker for something to get you out of a jam in a hurry.

They always give you the last thing you need.

Breaking News - Devon and Cornwall Music Festival

The Devon and Cornwall Music Festival due to take place this weekend has had to be cancelled. They couldn't decide who to put on first, The Jam or Cream

The counties of Devon and Cornwall organised a huge music festival with the reunions of both The Jam and Cream.

The festival was called off due to the two counties not being able to agree which should go on first.

"I'd like to have a toast" said the father-in-law at his daughters wedding

"Add some jam on it," he continued

I like my enemies like I like my jam.

On the end of a knife.

Peanut butter was driving his toast when suddenly...

..there was a jam

What's an oyster's favorite band?

Pearl Jam.

Ants Dancing

Q: Why did the ants dance on the jam jar?

A: The lid said, "Twist to open."

Why was Mr. Strawberry sad?

He was in a Jam.

Did anyone know what happened to that passion fruit truck crash yesterday?

It caused traffic jam.

I was her bread, she was my jam

One day she left me saying "you deserve butter".

Give a man some jam and he can enjoy a nice piece of toast

Teach a man to jam and his Phish cover band will ruin your wedding

What's the difference between Jam and Jelly?

Jam is made from crushed, pureed fruit and Jelly is made from fruit juice that gels when cooked.

What'd you think I was gonna say? Get your head out of the gutter.

What kind of donuts did Bob Marley prefer?

The ones with Jam in

Your Mother and I are like peanut butter and jelly

She spreads and I jam

What does the band Pearl Jam say when they're discouraged?

Ugh, we're not getting Eddy Vetter!

I think I might be gender fluid because today I felt like a woman.

I couldn't get the lid off a jar of jam.

How do you call a bunch of strawberries playing the guitar?

A jam session.

I made a jam bands playlist on Spotify

It's 16 hours long and only has 5 songs on it

What's on a toast that got run over by a car?

Traffic Jam

Did you guys hear the newest song from the band Stewed Fruit?

It's my jam.

What does Michael Jordan like to put on his toast for breakfast?

Space Jam

What does a astronaut put in a sandwich?

Space Jam

My grandma has ingrained this silly joke since I was young: What did one strawberry say to the other strawberry?

If you weren't so fresh last night, we wouldn't be in this jam!

One day jam broke up with bread and what did she say

She said u deserve "butter"

What would have been Beethoven's record label?

Deaf Jam.

I was the bread she was my jam but....

She said that I deserve butter.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the jam mccartney jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working jam jelly piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes