Ivanka Jokes
17 ivanka jokes and hilarious ivanka puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ivanka that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Ivanka Short Jokes
Short ivanka jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ivanka humour may include short president jokes also.
- The only thing that Trump and I can agree on... ...is that I would also date Ivanka if she wasn't his daughter.
- I don't see why people are outraged when Donald Trump says if Ivanka wasn't his daughter, he'd be dating her. After all, if Ivanka wasn't Trump's daughter, I'd date her too.
- I finally figured why Trump decided to wear a mask!! Some one told him it was made from Ivanka's underwear.
- Robert Mueller is looking at Don Jr. and Ivanka's involvement in Trump Tower Moscow This is a family separation I can get behind!
- As liberal as I am, Donald Trump and I do have one thing in common. If Ivanka weren't his daughter, perhaps I'd be dating her.
- Donald, Melania, and Ivanka are at the game They show up on the kiss cam, so Donald and Ivanka kiss
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Ivanka One Liners
Which ivanka one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ivanka? I can suggest the ones about presidential and pardon.
- Ivanka recently got a nose job. When she asked her fathers opinion he said Fake Nose!
- At least Rosie and Donald can agree on this They'd both do Ivanka.
- Ivanka Am i on a list now?
- Ivanka is pregnant again, her new baby boy is due in October. She should call him Wally.
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What funny jokes about ivanka you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean treason jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ivanka pranks.
The trump family is flying from New York to DC
Donald looks down on the cities below and says "I think I'll throw a 1000$ bill out of the window and make some american happy. Melanie says "Oh honey why not throw 10 100$ bills and make 10 americans happy?"
So then Ivanka says "Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out of the window and make 100 americans happy?" To that the pilot says " Why dont you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Donald Trump gets executed
and is hanged by the neck until dead.
At Trump Tower, his family watches CNN, which is covering his death live, all of them mournful and teary before Donald himself walks in triumphantly.
"But Donald, CNN says you were killed!" Ivanka cried.
"Nope!" Donnie beamed, holding up the rope that was used to hang him, "fake noose."
Ivanka Trump is walking a dog outside the White House...
A Secret Service agent sees her and says "Good Morning, Ma'am."
"Good morning." She replies.
"That's a very cute dog, ma'am." the agent says trying to make polite small talk.
"Oh, thank you. I got it for the President." She replies with a smile.
"Excellent trade, Ma'am."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If Biden unfucks any more of Trump's mistakes any faster...
There'll be no Ivanka and Jr. by Sunday.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Trump Family is flying from New York to DC
Donald-"I think I'll throw a $1000 bill out the window and make some American happy"
Melania- "Why don't you throw ten $100 bills and make ten Americans happy?
Ivanka- "It will be even better if you throw one hundred $10 dollar bills and make one hundred people happy?
The pilot hears the conversation and exclaims "Why don't y'all jump out the window and make the entire country happy?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I bet Ivanka Trump actually turned down a position in President Trump's cabinet
I mean how many women would feel comfortable working for a man who said they would screw their daughter.
Two Soviet commandos were crawling through a minefield.
Ivanka was leading Vladimir through a belly-crawl in a minefield.
Vladimir spoke, "Ivanka, your mother must have been a ballerina."
"Why?"
"Because of your beautiful legs."
Ivanka replied, "And your father must have been a farmer."
"Why?"
"Because of the deep furrow you're leaving."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did Donald Trump want to appoint Ivanka the Secretary of State?
Because in his line of work, you always get to bang the secretary.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Supreme Court
Year 2022; Republicans Vote Child-r**... into SCOTUS 51-49
Year 2027; Republicans Vote m**... into SCOTUS 50-50 + Veep
Year 2035; Republicans Vote Ivanka Trump into SCOTUS 62-38
