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Isis Jokes

107 isis jokes and hilarious isis puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about isis that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Isis Short Jokes

Short isis jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The isis humour may include short execution jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between a Syrian kindergarten and an ISIS hospital? I wouldn't know, I'm just the drone operator.
  2. Our President Elect is a real tough guy... The candidate who was going to "defeat ISIS" is currently at war with Saturday Night Live and a broadway musical.
  3. Whats the difference between an ISIS training camp and a children's hospital? I dunno, I just fly the drone...
  4. What's the difference between a Syrian wedding and an ISIS training camp? I don't know man, I just fly the drone.
  5. What's the difference between a pakistani preschool and Isis headquarters? I don't know man I just fly the drones
  6. What`s the difference between a Doctors Without Borders hospital and ISIS? How would I know, I`m just a US air force Operator.
  7. So the US Military dropped a 22,000 lb bomb on ISIS today. That moves Amy Shumer's special to the second spot for largest bomb for the year.
  8. What's the difference between a group of Pakastani School Girls and a group of ISIS soldiers.. Don't ask me I just fly the drone.
  9. What's the difference between an Iraqi elementary school, and an Isis hideout? I don't know man, I just fly the drone.
  10. What's the difference between an Iraqi school and an Iraqi Army base? One poses a significant potential threat to ISIS and its continued existence.
    The other is an Iraqi Army base.

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Isis One Liners

Which isis one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with isis? I can suggest the ones about terrorism and recruit.

  1. I joined ISIS to help my self esteem issues. Everyone kept telling me You're the bomb.
  2. What do Little Miss Muffet and ISIS have in common? They both have Kurds in their way
  3. What would you call ISIS after they've been eliminated? WASWAS.
  4. What do you call a camera mounted on a ISIS-truck? a daeshcam
  5. What do you call it when ISIS soldiers run for cover? 100 meter Daesh
  6. Global warming can reduce terrorism because the isis melting.
  7. ISIS just frozen water
  8. Did you know global warming is reducing terrorism? The ISIS melting.
  9. Wanna know how I got away from ISIS? Iran
  10. If ISIS is destroyed... ... Will they be known as WASWAS?
  11. What does the CEO of Keurig have in common with ISIS? They both hate the French press
  12. What do you call the pack of boars who killed members of Isis? Squeal Team 6
  13. What Makes ISIS Spread Faster Than The Internet? An Airstrike.
  14. I'm going to open an ISIS themed cafe called Allahu Snackbar - our food is the bomb.
  15. If isis gets bombed They'll be called waswas
Isis joke, If isis gets bombed

Fun-Filled Isis Jokes to Boost Your Mood

What funny jokes about isis you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make isis pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What will the ISIS be called when we eventually destroy them?

WASWAS.

What is a character trait of ISIS?

a.) heading
b.) heading
c.) heading

Home safety

I took my name off the Neighborhood Watch List.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in my front garden, one at each corner and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, and multiple intelligence services are watching my house 24/7.
I've never felt safer in my entire Life!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

U.S. Navy Seals just freed thousands of ISIS s**... slaves ...

All the goats have been moved to an undisclosed location and are awaiting to be reunited with their respective farmers.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What do ISIS want for Christmas?

Turkey, apparently.

Why does ISIS only drink drip coffee?

Because they hate French Press!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I installed a new home alarm system I've never felt safer

I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I've never felt safer and I am saving $49.95 a month.

What do ISIS and anime fans have in common?

They both get hot and bothered over cartoons.

What's the difference between parents who don't vaccinate their children and ISIS?

One is a group made up of radicals with extremist views.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
And the other group is ISIS.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

How did Isis move from 5th wanted t**... group to the most wanted t**... group?

They cut a head

What is ISIS after an airstrike?

Waswas

How do you pass the Isis entrance exam?

I don't know about you, I bombed it.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Isis and the Christian man

An ISIS member stopped the car of a Christian couple.
ISIS member: Are you Muslim?
Christian man: Yes, I'm Muslim.
ISIS member: If you are a Muslim, then recite a verse of Quran.
Christian man recited a verse from the Bible.
ISIS member: Ok yallah go.
Later his wife tells him: "I cannot believe the risk you just took.
Why did u tell him that we are Muslims?
If he knew you were lying he would have killed both of us."
"Do not worry! If they knew the Quran they would not kill people" answered the Husband.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Why did the polar bear join the t**... group.

Because that is where the ISIS.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What's the best part of an ISIS joke?

The Execution.
Hehe...get it? No? Fine I'll be-heading off now.

Apparently the US government has to choose between supporting ISIS and the al-Assad regime...

I think that's called getting caught between Iraq and a hard place.

ISIS vs North Korea. Who would win?

everyone

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

So, Anonymous has declared war on ISIS

... ironic that 72 virgins are now attacking the terrorists

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

There's an ISIS comedy night coming up...

I would go but i'm fairly certain they're all going to bomb.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Took down my rebel flag and peeled off my NRA sticker off the front door.

We have disconnected our home alarm system and quit the candy-a**... neighborhood watch. We bought two Pakistani flags on eBay and raised them in the front yard, one at each corner, plus a black flag of ISIS in the center. Now, the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I have never felt safer and we're saving $49.99 a month!

Why do ISIS fighters avoid Montreal restaurants?

because they serve Poutine.

"You da bomb" was one of the best things to hear someone tell me when I was younger.

But the possibility of hearing it now has me scared to death here in ISIS.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I wanted to make sure my kids were safe when they are playing outside....

So I put an ISIS flag in my window.
Now my neighbors watch them 24/7.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Why does ISIS call camels "Ships of the Desert"?

Because they are full of ISIS s**....

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Did you know ISIS has its own s**... toy factory?

There specialise in blow up dolls

How does ISIS cool down in the summer time?

In a blow up pool

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Why wont ISIS bomb my local Walmart?

...because its not a Target.

What do the Russians use to film their war with Isis?

Daeshcams

Why did the surfer join ISIS?

Because he was totally radical!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

ISIS takes Congress hostage

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC.
Nothing was moving.
Suddenly, a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's going on?"
"Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire."
"We are going from car to car, collecting donations."
"How much is everyone giving, on an average?" the driver asks.
The man replies, "Roughly a gallon."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Congratulations West Ham

The only club named after two things that ISIS hate.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

How do you tell the difference between a Pakistani wedding and an ISIS training camp?

I don't know, I just fly the drone

Q: What is the difference between an ISIS boot camp and a local school?

A: How should I know? I just fly the drones.
A lot of you probably heard this before. I heard it for the first time and felt like sharing

What is The ISIS Cafeteria called?

Allahu Snakbar.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What do you call an ISIS member with Tourette's?

A ticking time bomb.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Did you hear anonymous declared war on ISIS?

A: Kind of ironic that they're now being attacked by 72 virgins

Why are ISIS inflatable mattresses the best?

They blow themselves up.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

At an ISIS recruitment centre...

Interviewer: Name?
Recruit: Saaed Bin Hasrat.
Interviewer: s**...?
Recruit: Often twice a day.
Interviewer: No, no. Male or female?
Recruit: Male, female, sometimes camel, mostly sheep.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

My mom told me to go join ISIS...

She says I could learn how to claim responsibility for once

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

How did the ISIS soldier cross the road?

In pieces.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What does an ISIS member use for s**...?

A blow-up doll.

ISIS has reportedly starting putting bombs in cans of alphabet soup

If any go off, it could spell disaster

Hey when ISIS is gone do we call them.....

WASWAS then?

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

As the k**... are so full of hate, bigotry and want to rid America of others...

Should we call them Vanilla Isis ?

What do you call a concession stand operated by Isis?

Allahu Snackbar

ISIS lost a capital today

ISIs

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What's the difference between a Middle Eastern preschool and an ISIS training camp?

I have no idea, I just fly the drone

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

How do ISIS members practice safe s**...?

they mark the camels that kick

Trump, Merkel and Kim Jong-un are in the Middle East being chased by ISIS:

Trump turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll pay you a million dollars!" The terrorists continued.
Then Merkel turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll give you German citizenship!" The terrorists still kept chasing.
Then Kim Jong-un turns and shouts: "You are about to cross the border into the People's Democratic Republic of Korea. Welcome!"
The terrorists screamed and turned to run away.

Due to recent developments, ISIS changed its name to......

WASWAS

What's the difference between a Kindergarten and an ISIS stronghold?

I don't know, I just fly the drones

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Isis sent me a s**... doll today

It's great! It blows it self up.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Meanwhile at an ISIS training camp

A bunch of prospective terrorists gathered for their final training lesson before going into the field.
Their instructor said, Now, watch closely, children. I can only show you how to do this once.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What makes an ISIS joke funny?

The execution.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A bunch of soldiers were suddenly under fire by ISIS troops

Officer: Men! FIRE AT WILL!
Will: What did I do?

What did the Redditor that joined ISIS say?

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

You've got to hand it to Trump, he defeated ISIS...

...they gave up operations after Trump shows he can kill more Americans than they ever could.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Snow isn't a problem in Muslim countries but...

...ISIS

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Snow isnt aproblem in arab countries

But isis

Isis joke, Snow isnt aproblem in arab countries

jokes about isis