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Involves Jokes

62 involves jokes and hilarious involves puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about involves that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Involves Short Jokes

Short involves jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The involves humour may include short involving jokes also.

  1. Breaking News: Local Kindergarten reports major Peek-a-Boo accident. All involved were rushed to the ICU
  2. I wanted to change my name to Frieza but had no idea how much paperwork would be involved. This isn't even my final form.
  3. When German children play a game involving touching each other with bread... it's called gluten tag.
    I'll show myself out.
  4. I started carrying a gun after being involved in an attempted robbery a few months ago. Ever since, my robberies have been going a whole lot better.
  5. There are four stages of life and they all involve Santa 1. You believe in Santa.
    2. You don't believe in Santa.
    3. You are Santa.
    4. You look like Santa.
  6. I'm still a bit shaken up. I was involved in a violent mugging this morning. On the plus side I did make $43 and I think the watch looks really good on me.
  7. [Bad joke] The other day my sister asked me what the difference between cellular division and a sock is To which I replied 'Nothing, they both involve mitosis'
  8. My younger brother is an example of what can happen to people who get involved in drugs. ......an audi Q7 & his own house by the age of 20.
  9. If Satan was a teacher, which subject would he teach? Trigonometry. There's a lot of sin involved.
  10. What does a gangster rapper Juice Wrld do when they are involved in a shipwreck? Swim fo sho

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Involves One Liners

Which involves one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with involves? I can suggest the ones about takes place and included.

  1. I hope elon musk never gets involved in a scandal Elongate would be really drawn out.
  2. Why are Italians so good at football? Because it involves changing sides halfway through.
  3. I wasn't sure about getting involved in human trafficking at first... But now i'm sold.
  4. What Olympic event that involves throwing should be eliminated? Discuss
  5. Thought of starting an origami business but too lazy to do all the paperwork involved.
  6. What involves a man and two women, and doesn't even last a minute? A Ronda Rousey fight.
  7. Why are vegetarians never involved in Any drama? They can't stand beef
  8. What if Stephen Colbert got involved in a scandal? It would be called Colgate.
  9. I wasn't sure about getting involved in human trafficking. But now I'm sold.
  10. Why didn't 4 get involved in the 789 incident? He was 2²
  11. A Sapiosexual couple's foreplay Involves blowing each other's minds
  12. The steps involved in constipation: 1) Sit on the toilet.
    There is no number two.
  13. There was an accident involving 2 cars in mexico 17 people were injured.
  14. Why do churches hate geometry? There's too many sins involved.
  15. Marriage involves three rings. The engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffering.

Involves joke, Marriage involves three rings.

Ridiculous Involves Jokes to Spark Fun and Laughter

What funny jokes about involves you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean engaged jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make involves pranks.

Can you write a whole paragraph without the letter A?

I wouldn't recommend it.
Honestly, your sentences willl just sound wrong.
Everyone will notice you're doing something
different. Your writing won't flow smoothly. You'll
use weird words.
It's not worth the effort involved in spending
time online looking up tons of synonyms which
don't feel right, just to produce weird, stilted
prose.
You'd be better off giving up, to be honest.

A young couple dies on their way to their wedding....

On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple were involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven.
While waiting they began to wonder; Could they possibly get married in Heaven?
When St. Peter arrived they asked him if they could get married in Heaven.
St. Peter said, 'I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out,' and he left.
The couple sat and waited for an answer.... for a couple of months.
While they waited, they discussed the pros and cons. If they were allowed to get married in Heaven, should they get married, what with the eternal aspect of it all?
What if it doesn't work? Are we stuck in Heaven together forever?'
Another month passed. St. Peter finally returned, looking somewhat bedraggled.
Yes,' he informed the couple, 'You can get married in Heaven.'
'Great!' said the couple. 'But we were just wondering; what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?'
St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard on the ground.
'What's wrong?' asked the frightened couple.
'OH, COME ON!!!' St. Peter shouted. 'It took me 3 months to find a priest up here! Do you have ANY idea how long it'll take to find a lawyer?

Why is everyone criticising EA?

I've only ever known EA as an excellent video game company and pioneer of the early home computer games industry. EA has always had my enjoyment as their primary concern and their community involvement is phenomenal.
($50 has been deposited into your Paypal account, remember to delete this part of the message before posting it).

Gimme your best Mickey Mouse/Disney character joke!

Going on a Disney Cruise and need your funniest, raunchiest or most n**... joke involving a Disney character.

I witnessed a huge accident on the highway today involving a semi truck packed full of toupees that overturned.

police are still there combing the scene.

So a college teacher is talking to his male students...

"Access to the women's dorms is strictly prohibited. If someone is caught there for the first time, they will suffer a fine of 100 dollars. The second offence will involve a 300 dollar fine. Getting caught there for the third time will cost you a hefty fine of 500 dollars."
Suddenly, a student in the back raises his hand and asks:
"How much for a semester pass?"

How much of s**... is work?

A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its brewing, the colonel decided to pose a question to all assembled.
He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep. He posed the question of just how much of s**... was "work" and how much of it was "pleasure?" A Major chimed in with 25-75% in favor of work . A Captain said it was 50-50%. A lieutenant responded with 25-75% in favor of pleasure , depending on how drunk he was at the time.
There being no consensus, the colonel turned to the Private who was in charge of making the coffee. What was your opinion?
Without any hesitation, the young PFC responded, "Sir, it has to be 100% pleasure."
The colonel was surprised and, as you might guess, asked why.
"Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."

A city bus driver is doing his route.

After picking up some passengers, an argument about race broke out. Most of the passengers on the bus are getting involved and after twenty minutes of bickering the driver, tired of the argument, slams on the brakes and stops in the middle of the street. Everyone shuts up. He stands up and shouts at them, "I'm TIRED of this. I'm an old man and I can't bear to listen to this arguing anymore. From now on, there's no black, there's no white, got it? We're all the same color. We're all green. Now everyone sit down, dark green in back, light green in front."

A man orders a coffee

A man enters a bar and the bartender comes over and asks "Can I help you sir?".
The man answers "What does a cup of coffee cost in this place?".
The bartender says "That would be $2.60".
"Alright, I'll have one." says the client and he takes 26 dimes out of his wallet and he throws them on the ground.
The bartender doesn't want to get involved in a fight so he just picks up the money and he brings the man his coffee.
A week later, the same man enters the bar. He orders a coffee again but this time he pays with a five dollar bill.
The bartender smelled an opportunity for revenge and when he brings the coffee, he throws 48 nickels on the ground as change. The client throws 2 extra dimes on the floor and orders a second coffee.

I tried to do an intense workout that involved 500 sit ups per day

But my body couldn't take the ab use

What letter do pirate's hate the most?

Dear Charter Internet Customer:

Charter Communications ("Charter") has been notified by a copyright owner, or its authorized agent, that your Internet account may have been involved in the exchange of unauthorized copies of copyrighted material (e.g., music, movies, or software). We are attaching a copy of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) notice that Charter received from the copyright holder which includes the specific allegation.

I love February because it contains two of my favorite annual events

Groundhog Day, and the State of the Union Address.
One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a notoriously unreliable mammal for prognostication with no basis in reality. The other involves a groundhog.

A man called the hotel manager...

He said "Come up quickly, I fought with my wife and now she wants to throw herself out the window!". The manager replied "Sir this is a personal matter and we can't get involved. I can call sec..." The man interrupted "No! This is a maintenance issue. The window won't open!".

Is R Kelly a rapper or a r**...?

It depends how much pee is involved.

A t**... involves three people. A twosome involves two.

I guess that's why everybody keeps calling me handsome.

A man calls the hotel front desk

"Hello how I may I be of assistance sir?"
"I NEED YOU TO SEND SOMEONE TO MY ROOM RIGHT AWAY."
"Calm down Sir, what seems to be the problem?"
"My wife is trying to jump out of the window..."
"Oh that sounds like a personal matter, I'm afraid we cannot involve ourselves."
"Listen here you smartass, the window isn't opening up and that's a maintenance matter!"

My wife crashed our car this morning.

When the police came she said the guy involved was on his mobile and eating a pie at the time.
The police advised her the guy was entitled to do what he wanted in his own living room.

There isn't much training involved in being a garbage man

You just pick it up as you go along

How many Republican does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Twelve to investigate Obama's involvement in the failure of the old bulb, 23 to deregulate the lightbulb industry and 51 to pass a tax credit for lightbulb changes.

The difference between being Involved vs. Committed

Take a Bacon, Egg, and Cheese sandwich. The chicken and the cow are involved, but the pig is committed.

Two Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.

A woman is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says Two Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.

The woman starts crying to her husband, sobbing That's horrible!!! So many men dying that way!
Confused, he says, Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved.

After a few minutes, the woman, still sobbing, asks, How many is a Brazilian?

A man stood outside of his house after a bitter divorce and he noticed a crate of beer bottles.

He took out an empty bottle and smashed it onto the wall swearing, "you are the reason I don't have a wife.
He smashed the second bottle, "you are the reason I don't have children".
He smashed the third bottle, "you are the reason I don't have a job".
When he took the fourth bottle, he realized that the bottle was still sealed and full of beer and he said to the bottle, "you stand aside, I know you were not involved".

I was involved in a car c**... last night.

As I regained consciousness from last nights car c**....
The Doctors were trying to convince me that I'm actually a Swedish guy who has forgotten his identity...
But I am having none of it. I wasn't Bjorn yesterday!

Why did the tomato turn red?

Well, you see, the tomato belongs to a family of plants called Solanaceae, which contains a pigment called lycopene. When the tomato begins to ripen, the chlorophyll in the fruit starts to break down, allowing the lycopene to become more visible. As a result, the tomato appears to turn from a greenish color to a bright red hue, indicating that it is now fully ripe and ready to be eaten. So, to answer your question, the tomato turned red due to a complex biological process involving the breakdown of chlorophyll and the activation of lycopene, which is a natural pigment found in the fruit.

What do you get when the government gets involved in digestive issues.

An e**... of the state.

Okay, we need a title for our fantasy novel involving dragons. Any ideas?

…Dragon?
It can't just be Dragon.
Umm… Cragon?
No, that's awful. Come on, think harder.
Umm…. Eragon?
….Bingo.

What is the Roman Empire?

In the heart of the bustling Roman Empire, there was a philosopher known for his wisdom, humor, and the ability to make light of the most complex issues. One day, a curious citizen confronted him, asking "What exactly is the Roman Empire?"
The philosopher paused for a moment before saying, "Imagine a man trying to wrestle a lion. The man is strong and well-prepared, but he is, after all, merely a man. The lion is wild, ferocious, and barely within his control. Yet, the man does not back down; he dives headfirst into the tangle, figuring out how to tackle it as he goes along. That, my friend, is the Roman Empire."
The citizen blinked and asked, "So, we're the man in this scenario, right? Struggling against the fierce lion that is the vast world?"
"No, not exactly," chuckled the philosopher. "You see, the man is the Roman Empire, always seeking to overcome, control, and rule, even when the odds seem overwhelming. The lion, rather, represents the infinite sea of cultures, lands, and people that the Empire constantly tangles with."
"But what if the lion eventually wins?" queried the citizen, now intrigued.
"Well," the philosopher answered with a mischievous glint in his eye, "Then the joke's on us, isn't it?"
The gathered crowd erupted into laughter, appreciating the wit and wisdom tied into the punchline. After all, understanding the Roman Empire didn't just involve historical facts and figures; sometimes, it was just about appreciating the irony!

How is Karwa Chauth like a cricket game? Both involve fasting... until the moon comes out!

Involves joke

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