Interview Jokes
133 interview jokes and hilarious interview puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about interview that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for a way to break the ice and make a great impression on your job interview? We provide some light-hearted interview jokes that are sure to brighten up an interviewers day while also showing that you are confident and at ease. Learn how to use these jokes in an appropriate manner to lighten the mood and create a positive working atmosphere with your interviewer.
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Funniest Interview Short Jokes
Short interview jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The interview humour may include short interrogation jokes also.
- Antiwork did an interview on fox News to try to create a good public image of their sub It didn't work.
- I was applying for australian citizenship and the interviewer asked, Do you have a criminal record? I said, No. Is that still required?
- Interviewer: "I heard you were extremely quick at math" Me: "yes, as a matter of fact I am"
Interviewer: "Whats 14x27"
Me: "49"
Interviewer: "that's not even close"
me: "yeah, but it was fast" - a guy got an Interview for a job with EA Boss: the second part of your resume is missing
Applicant: for the second part you have to pay 20$
Boss: welcome on board - Interviewer: Can you explain these 4 jobless years in your resume? Applicant: That's when I went to Yale. Interviewer: Impressive! You are hired!
Applicant: Thanks, I really need this yob. - Interviewer: How do you explain the five-year gap on your resume? Me: Oh, that was when I went to Yale.
Interviwer: Amazing! You're hired.
Me: Yay, I got a yob! - Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in the next five years? Me: I'd say my biggest weakness is listening.
- Interviewer: What's your greatest weakness? Me: Answering the semantics of a question but ignoring the pragmatics
Interviewer: Could you give me an example?
Me: Yes I could - During a job interview yestarday I poured some water into a cup and it overflowed slightly "Nervous?" asked the interviewer, I simply replied "No I always give 110%"
- My kid says he came up with this one: A guy goes to interview for IKEA... The manager says Welcome! Come in and make a seat.
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Interview One Liners
Which interview one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with interview? I can suggest the ones about audition and conversation.
- Interviewer - Okay, describe yourself in 3 words Lazy
- I recently submitted my resume to Sony But they canceled the interview
- Interviewer: So, tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not... I kinda want this job.
- The interviewer asked me, Describe yourself in three words. Lazy.
- *Interviewing for waiter position* I feel like I bring a lot to the table
- Job Interview: Why do you think you'd be a good waiter? I bring a lot to the table.
- I saw a robbery at an apple store today. They interviewed me because I was an iWitness.
- Interviewer: How would you describe yourself in five words? Me: Lazy
- Interviewer: Why should we hire you as a reverse psychologist? Me: You shouldn't.
- At a job interview."Can you perform under pressure?" No ,but I can try Bohemian Rhapsody!
- What do you call an interview with a slaughterhouse? Meat and greet
- Interviewer: What would you say is your greatest weakness? Achilles: *sweats nervously*
- Interviewer: your resume says you're very literal Me: my resume talks??
- Interviewer: Describe yourself in 3 words Not good at counting
- This guy went for an interview with Buzzfeed What happened next will shock you
Interview Job Jokes
Here is a list of funny interview job jokes and even better interview job puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Job interviewer: And where would you see yourself in five years' time Mr. Jeffries?" Me: "Personally I believe my biggest weakness is in listening."
- Interviewer: "We're looking for someone who is responsible." Me: "A lot of things went wrong at my last job and everyone said I was responsible. "
- Just got back from a job interview, where I was asked if can perform under pressure. I said I wasn't too sure about that but I do a wicked Bohemian Rhapsody.
- A man is in a job interview.. "So it says here that you consider your memory to be one of your greatest strengths?"
"Absolutely."
"Could you give me an example of that?"
"An example of what?" - I went on a job interview for a security guard. After spending 12 hours in the waiting room... ...they hired me.
- JOB OPPORTUNITY: Riot police officers needed. Interviews are being held tomorrow. Come early....
....beat the crowd.
- Kelvin and Celsius had a job interview but only one of them got the job. It was Celsius because he had a degree.
- I went for a job interview at EA Games today. The interviewer said to me, The second part of your resume is missing.
I said, For the second part, you have to pay $20. - The job interviewer asked... The job interviewer asked: "What's your biggest weakness?"
Me: "I don't know when to quit..."
Interviewer: "You're hired!"
Me: "I quit." - Yesterday at a job interview I filled my glass of water until it overflowed a little. "Nervous?" asked the interviewer
I replied, "No, I always give 110%"
Job Interview Jokes
Here is a list of funny job interview jokes and even better job interview puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Was once asked on a job interview if I could perform under pressure. Me: Well I don't know about that, but I'll give Bohemian Rhapsody a try.
- Interview Employer: This is an important job, we need someone who is responsible.
Applicant: I'm the one you want!
At my last job, every time there was a problem, they said I was responsible. - I went to a job interview at EA The interviewer, after reading my CV, said:
"I see that this CV was clearly printed on two pages, but I only have one. Where's the other one?"
"Page two is 19.99$" - Job interview Interviewer: How do you explain this 4 year gap in your resume?
Candidate: I was in Yale.
Interviewer: Congratulations! You are hired.
Candidate: Thank you. I really need this Yob. - During a job interview at the 99 Cents store, my son was asked, Where do you see yourself in five years? My son's reply: At the Dollar Store. He got the job.
- Job interview Job interviewer: How do you explain this 4 year gap on your resume?
Me: That's when i went to yale.
Interviewer: That's impressive. Your hired
Me: Thanks i really needed this yob. - Job Interview "It says in your CV that you are quick at mathematics. What is 17x19?"
"36"
"That's not even close!"
"But it was quick!" - The interviewer asked, "Where do you see yourself in five years?" The job candidate responded, " I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision."
Use it while you can, people! - At a recent job interview, the hiring manager asked me if I can perform under pressure.
I said no, but I can do Bohemian Rhapsody. - Job Interviewer: So where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I guess my biggest weakness is I am not always a good listener
Interview Questions Jokes
Here is a list of funny interview questions jokes and even better interview questions puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Me: "How is it we assume that dinosaurs just roared... They could have talked like us, right?" Interviewer: "I meant questions about the job..."
- An Interview with a Master Ninja When questioned on whether he thought his pupil could win his upcoming training match the Sensei had this to say:
"Shuriken". - I was interviewed by the police yesterday. I just said "No comment" to all their questions. They said they'd let me know but somehow I don't think I am going to get the job.
- Interviewer: What are your thoughts about nepotism in a workplace environment? Candidate: Well, that's a really good question, Dad.
- Being an engineer, I went for an interview. They just asked one question... Interviewer : What's the value of pi?
Me : 3
*Hired* - A man tries to get a job at Paradox Interactive. In the job interview, the interviewer asks:
"Are you going to answer this question?"
"No", the man replies.
He got accepted. - During a job interview, I got the typical question about my greatest weakness. "Kryptonite."
I start on Monday. - All of Donald Trump's wives are foreigners... Turns out there really are jobs American's won't do.
Source: Mitt Romney's response to an interviewer's question. - Interviewer:Do you have time for a question? A: Yes...but...do...you...have...time...for...my...answer?
- Faced an interview question I couldn't answer, so I went to hide in the bathroom and stood on the toilet You could say I'm stalling.
The Funniest Interview Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What funny jokes about interview you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean survey jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make interview pranks.
I was at a job interview today when the manager handed me his laptop and said
"I want you to try to sell this to me."
So I put it under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home.
Eventually he called me and said "Bring my laptop back here right now!"
I said "$200 and it's yours."
I was in a job interview today when the manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me."
So I put it under my arm, walked out of the building and went home.
Eventually, he called me on my phone and said, "Bring it back here right now!"
I replied, "£100 and it's yours."
A man goes into a job interview
A man goes into a job interview, and presents himself well.
The employer is shocked at how professional he is, "Wow, you have an incredible resume, and present yourself fantastically, but you seem to be missing 5 years on this part of your resume. What happened there?"
The man replied "Oh that's when I went to Yale."
The employer is even more impressed. "That's great, you're hired!"
The man is super happy and says "Yay I got a yob!"
I looked her square in the eyes and said, "s**... isn't real, right? It's just u**..., right?"
"I meant any questions about the job." the interviewer sighed.
At the interview for my new job I was asked
"What would your friends say are your weaknesses?"
"I don't have any!" Was my reply.
The interviewer seemed a little surprised and answered: "That can't be true. Everybody has some weak points."
Whereupon I said: "Oh no. You got that wrong. I meant I don't have any friends."
A poker player wins one million dollars first price in a tournament
Interviewer: Congratulations on your win! If you don't mind me asking, how will you spend you $1 million winnings?
Poker player: I owe some people some money so I will be paying my debt to these guys.
Interviewer: and what about the rest?
Poker player: Well... I guess they'll have to wait..
I went for a job interview today and the manager said,"We're looking for someone who is responsible"
..."Well Im your man" I replied,"In my last job, whenever anything went wrong they said I was responsible"
Interviewer: What's your biggest strength?
Me: I'm a fast learner.
Interviewer: What's 11 * 11?
Me: 65.
Interviewer: Not even close. It's 121.
Me: It's 121.
A guy was nailing his interview
A guy was nailing his interview when the employer said "well you look great but I see here there was a 7 year gap since your last job, what happened there?".
The guy says "oh I went to yale".
The employer: "oh great!! Well you're hired, you start monday"
Guy: "Yay! I got a yob!"
In an interview I was asked where I see myself in five years
I replied with "I'd have to say my greatest weakness is listening."
A man walks into a job interview...
He sits down on a chair, and the interviewer starts questioning him.
"So son, where did you receive your education?"
The man replied "Yale".
The interviewer, pleasantly surprised, says "Yale? Hard to believe you went to Yale to become a janitor. So what's your name?"
The man replied "Yack Yackson".
Job interviewer: So, how do you wish to explain this four year gap on your resume?
Interviewee: That is because I went to Yale
Job interviewer: Oh, that is impressive! You are hired!
Interviewee: Thanks! I really needed this Yob
Donald Trump said in an interview that he would consider killing himself if he ever had Alzheimer's Disease.
Sadly, the interviewer didn't have the presence of mind to say, "I know. You've said that already."
Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"
Me: "I'd say my biggest weakness is listening"
An officer pulls up at the scene of an accident
where a car has driven through a field, killed several livestock and crashed into a barn. He decides to interview Steve who is struggling to keep his balance and is being propped up by Karen.
"Been out for a few have we mate?" asks the officer.
"Shuure ave mate" grins Steve.
"I realise you are very drunk sir," states the officer, "but that is absolutely no excuse to let your wife drive you home!"
Sony has a site where you can watch The Interview for $5.99 and I can't think of a single reason not to trust them with my credit card info.
Boxers or Briefs, Mr. President?
In 1992 while being interviewed by MTV, Bill Clinton was asked if he wore boxers or briefs? Clinton replied, "Boxers"
In 2008 US magazine asked Obama, "Boxers or briefs"? Obama declined to answer the question.
Last week AARP asked Joe Biden, "Boxers or briefs"? Biden responded, "Depends".
Not too sure I got the job....
Interview I had for a job:
"What's your greatest weakness?"
"Interpreting semantics of a question,
but ignoring the pragmatics."
"Could you give an example?"
"Yes, I could."
Studying engineering in school is like World War 2.
The objective is clear, there's an obvious enemy, and everyone is fighting for the same cause.
Interviewing to get an engineering job is like Vietnam. Everybody tells you a different objective, you're not properly equipped for the environment, and the Asians are always one step ahead.
At the job interview
Interviewer: I see here that you had a five-year gap between jobs. Can you please explain it?
Me: Oh that's when I went to Yale.
Interviewer: That is very impressive. You can start tomorrow.
Me: Yay, I got a yob.
Me: s**... isn't real, right? It's just u**..., right?
Interviewer: I meant any questions about the job.
During my interview today…
I poured some water into a cup and it overflowed a little bit.
Nervous? asked the interviewer.
I simply replied No, I just always give 110%
A reporter is interviewing Stevie Wonder
They talk about all the amazing music he has created over the years and the incredible things he has done with his life and as a last question the reporter asks:
"But don't you wish you hadn't been born blind?"
and Stevie replies "Hey, it could've been much worse - I could have been born black"
Interviewer: Is the glass half empty or half full?
Applicant: It's completely full.
Interviewer: We'd be glad to hire you. Welcome to the Lays factory.
A 100 year old Japanese man is being interviewed for a newspaper piece about extreme old age
and the reporter asks "do you think there's any merit to the stereotype that people from this village live a lot longer than others?"
The old man thinks for a second and says "you know, I'm not sure. Let me go ask my dad". And the reporter, stunned, stammers "y-your dad? Where is he right now??" and the old man says "I think he's out fishing with my grandpa".
Another interview joke
During a job interview, the interviewer asks, I noticed a 6 year gap in your resume. How do you account for this period of time?
The applicant responds, I went to Yale.
Excited, the interviewer says, Yale?!? You're hired!
The applicant replies, Yay! I got a yob!
A lawyer was interviewing a doctor about the death of a patient
"When you examined the patient, did you check his pulse?" asked the lawyer.
"I didn't" said the doctor.
"And did you listen for a heartbeat?" said the lawyer.
"No, I did not" the doctor said.
"So in other words" the lawyer said "When you signed the death certificate you had NOT taken adequate steps to confirm he was dead."
"Well, let me put it this way," said the doctor- "At that point, the man's brain was in a jar on my desk. But for all I know I guess he could've been out practicing law somewhere!"
Interviewer: "How do you explain the three year gap on your resume?"
Dave : "Oh! That was when I went to Yale!"
Interviewer: "Amazing! You're hired!"
Dave: "Hurray! I got a yob!"
During interviews he seems like such a nice guy, but the actor who plays Wolverine is a real phoney
It's a huge act, man..
During my job interview I was asked: After a long week how do you normally recharge your batteries
Apparently through high voltage n**... c**... wasn't the answer they were expecting.
I had a job interview...
...the interviewer slid his laptop across the table and said "sell this to me."
I closed the screen, unplugged it, and left.
I ignored his calls for about three hours. When I did answer, he said "Where is my laptop?!"
"You wanna buy it?"
I went for an interview for a job today and the manager said, We're looking for someone who's responsible.
Well, I'm your man!! I replied, In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.
James Bond is laid off
James Bond is laid off and at the job center, there are only two jobs available, one in a call center and the other in a fabric coloring plant
"Huh, " said Bond, "you expect me to talk?"
"No Mr Bond, " replied the interviewer, "I expect you to dye. "
Interviewer : "Just imagine you're in the 20th floor of a building and it's on fire. How will you escape?"
"It's simple.. I will just stop my imagination."
A reporter was interviewing a 102-year-old woman
"What's the secret to your longevity?", he asked.
"Simple. The biggest cause of aging is stress, and the biggest cause of stress is arguing with people. So I never argue with anyone."
The reporter laughed. "That's ridiculous. That can't be the real reason."
The old lady smiled and nodded. "You're probably right."
Interviewer: It says here you're skilled at saying unexpected things?
Me: Yes, I am.
Interviewer: Hmm, I thought you were going to say something unexpec-- oh, you're good.
Interviewer: Your resume says you take things too literally.
Me: When the h**... did my resume learn to talk?
A guy was nailing his interview and the employer said "well application looks great but there's a 7 year gap since your last job, what happened?"
The guy says "oh I went to yale",
The employer: Oh great your hired you start Monday.
Guy: "Yay I got a yob!"
A lumberjack applies for a job...
...the interviewer asks, "so, where have you worked previously?"
The lumberjack replies, "I did a few years in the Sahara Forest."
The interviewer, taken aback, inquires, "the Sahara 'Forest?' Don't you mean the Sahara Desert?"
Lumberjack says, "yeah, that's what they call it now."
I was at a job interview today...
When the manager handed me a laptop and said,
I want you to sell this to me.
So I put it under my arm, left the building and went home.
Eventually he called me and said, Bring my laptop back now.
I said, £200 and it's yours.
I went for an interview at IKEA.
The manager greeted me by saying, "Come in, make a seat."
Me: Do you remember t**...?
Interviewer: I meant do you have any questions about the job...
I had a job interview today.
I was offered the job and told the salary was £7.50 an hour for the first three months and would then go up to £15 an hour.
The guy asked me when I could start.
I replied "In three months."
The police chief asked, "Do you have any leads or suspects for the m**... case?" The officer responded, "I'd like to interview the bartender wearing high heels and a leopard print dress." The chief frowned and said...
"Please, just wear your police uniform."
At a job interview: "What's your greatest weakness?"
Interviewer: What's your greatest weakness?
Me: Answering the semantics of a question but ignoring the pragmatics.
Interviewer: Could you give me an example?
Me: Yes, yes I could.
A guy applies for a job with the Chicago Police Department
He has an impressive resume, gives the best answers to the interview questions, and is very enthusiastic about the job.
"Your qualifications are impressive" says the police chief. "Here's the final test. Take this gun, go out, and shoot ten black guys and a clown?"
The man asks, "why the clown?"
The police chief replies, "Fantastic attitude, you're hired!"
The interviewer asked me to show him an example of leadership skills.
"OK," I replied. "I'm hired."
So I had an interview last year
The interviewer: You answers should be quick
Me: Ok
Interviewer: what is 1490/52?
Me:quick
A reporter is interviewing a 110-year-old man
... And asks him his secret to longevity. "It's simple," the man replies, "I never argue with anyone, so I have no stress in my life."
The reporter laughs it off: "That's ridiculous. That can't possibly be the reason."
The man shrugs and says, "Yeah, you're probably right."
"What is your biggest weakness?" asked the interviewer.
I said, "Spiders."
He said, "Professional ones?"
I said, "I don't know, I've never seen one in a suit before."
A Swedish man shows up to a job interview
The interviewer says, "Mr. Gustafson, could you explain the 4 year gap in your resume?"
"I went to Yale", he replied.
"Outstanding! What did you go to Yale for?"
"Yacking off in the library"
I was at an important job interview today, when they asked me if I was on Facebook…
"Sorry, no. I'm not." I replied.
"Twitter?"
"Nope."
"Instagram?"
"Nah."
"Look, just put your phone away, will you!?"
Bird Impression
A traveling sideshow puts up a help wanted ad. A guy gets all excited and applies.
The sideshow owner brings him in for an interview and asks, "Ok, what's your talent? What can you do for me?"
The guy says "I do a really great bird impression!"
The owner responds, "Pff, no thanks. Plenty of people can do that."
So the guy says "Oh..ok...well thanks anyway,' and flies away.
Interviewer: Please explain this 4 year gap in your resume
Me: That was the time I was in Yale
Interviewer: Very impressive, we'd like to offer you the position
Me: Thanks, I really need this yob!
A young accountant, straight out of uni, applies for a job...
...advertised in the Manchester Evening News. He is interviewed by the owner of a small business who has built it up from scratch. "I need someone with an accounting degree," says the man, "but mainly I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for me."
"How do you mean?" says the accountant. "I have lots of things to worry about, but I want someone else to worry about money matters."
"OK," says the accountant. "How much are you offering?"
"You can start on seventy-five thousand," says the owner.
"Seventy-five thousand pounds. How can a business like this afford to pay so much?"
"That," says the man, "is your first worry."
James Bond hits upon hard times and finds himself facing a job seeker interview...
James Bond hits upon hard times and finds himself facing a job seeker interview,
"Well Mr Bond we have two positions we can offer you, one is giving lectures to children on the benefits of a career in military intelligence, and the other is in the fabric staining department of a yarn mill. "
"Do you expect me to talk? "
"No, Mr Bond, I expect you to dye. "
A reporter interviewed a 103-year-old woman.
"And what is the best thing about being 103?" the reporter asked.
She simply replied, "No peer pressure."