Inter Jokes
124 inter jokes and hilarious inter puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about inter that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Inter Short Jokes
Short inter jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The inter humour may include short intent jokes also.
- I liked it better when Donald Trump used to say "you're fired" to people instead of to inter-continental ballistic missiles.
- I started a new diet this week. I now abstain from eating any food while I put my mittens on in the winter. I call it inter-mitten fasting.
- Russian Cosmonauts have been banned from telling jokes on the Interational Space Station... ... because they always involve Mir puns.
- I asked my friend what is the internet He said,"internet is a network of networks which consists of inter connected networks. "
Now that's a lot of networks. - I knew I needed to seek out help when my friends staged the public condemnation of two overlapping circles. It was an inter-venn-shun.
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Inter One Liners
Which inter one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with inter? I can suggest the ones about utter and tern.
- What do Russians call it when there is no internet? Inter-nyet
- How does Bernie Sanders stay so slim? Inter-mitten fasting.
- What do you call taking naps between naps? Inter-resting!
- What do you call on-again off-again snow in Michigan? Inter-mitten.
- What do Russians use to censor websites? The Inter-nyet.
- When a dung beetle dies... is it interred?
- What do they say when there are no internet in Russia? Inter-njet
- What is a pirate's favorite statistic? The Inter-Quartile Range (a.k.a. the IQRrrrrgh!)
- What happens to a tapeworm after it dies? It will be interred.
- I went to the movies... ...and had an Un inter corrupted view.
- Apparently the running team had a huge o**... Inter-racial relationships.
Witty Inter Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about inter you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean intro jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make inter pranks.
I've been interrogating the dog for two solid hours.
He still won't tell me who's a good boy.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Interviewing Arab for US visa
Interviewing an arab for a visa
Consul : What is your name?
Arab: Abdul Aziz
Consul: s**...?
Arab : Six to ten times a week
Consul: I mean, male or female?
Arab : Both male and female and sometimes even camels.
Consul: Holy cow!
Arab : Yes, cows and dogs too!!!!
Consul: Man,........isn't it hostile?
Arab : Horse style, d**..., any style
Consul: Oh..........dear!
Arab : Deer? No deer, they run too fast
An International School Teacher
...starts a lesson with her 4 students, who are an American kid, an African kid, a European kid and a Chinese kid. She asks "what's your opinion on food scarcity in other countries?"
first, the African kid asks "what's food?"
the European kid asks "what's scarcity?"
the American kid asks "what's other countries?"
and finally the Chinese kid asks "what's my own opinion?"
Interview
Employer: This is an important job, we need someone who is responsible.
Applicant: I'm the one you want!
At my last job, every time there was a problem, they said I was responsible.
My interviewer kept getting annoyed at me...
...when I kept responding to each question with the same question - only in a really sarcastic way.
Apparently, I don't know what a "mock interview" means.
The internet is an amazing thing.
One minute I'm at work looking up
random pages, passing the time, the
next minute I'm at home looking for a new job.
My internet addiction is so bad...
Its alt of ctrl.
What's the internal temperature of a Ton-ton?
Lukewarm
What does the most interesting man in the world eat for breakfast?
Dos Eggies
What do internet pirates have on their legs?
j.peg
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Interruption of the speech of Comrade Stalin
Stalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes.
"Who sneezed?" (Silence.)
"First row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Applause.)
"Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Long, loud applause.)
"Who sneezed?" (Silence.) ...
A dejected voice in the back: "It was me" (Sobs.)
Stalin leans forward: "Bless you, comrade!"
Thanks to allrussias for glorious joke!
My internet is so slow...
Loading...
An Interview with a Master Ninja
When questioned on whether he thought his pupil could win his upcoming training match the Sensei had this to say:
"Shuriken".
There was an International Job opening.
Two men applied, a Canadian man, and an American. After the test and the interview, they company decided to go with the Canadian man. The American with distraught asked why they decided to hire the Canadian and how he did in the interview and test. They said it was a very difficult decision because they both did equally well on the test and in the interview. The American was outraged. "THEN WHY DID YOU HIRE THE CANADIAN?!?." The manager then responded, "Well, you both did equally well in the interview, but the real problem was the test. You both got 9/10 on the test, but for question 10, the Canadian man put 'I don't know' and you put 'me neither.'"
Shout out to my Math Teacher for telling me this one.
Interviewer: It says here you're skilled at saying unexpected things?
Me: Yes, I am.
Interviewer: Hmm, I thought you were going to say something unexpec-- oh, you're good.
Interesting accents!
3 hefty women walk into a restaurant, and sit down at a table. The server comes to take their drink orders. When they're done ordering he says, "What an interesting accent! Are you broads from Scotland?"
One woman looks at him with surprise and disgust and says, "WALES!"
The bartender says, "Okay, fine. Are you whales from Scotland?"
The interviewer asked, "Where do you see yourself in five years?"
The job candidate responded, " I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision."
Use it while you can, people!
What's the internal temperature of a tauntaun?
Luke Warm.
May the 4th Be With You!
Internet went down last night
My neighbour added a password
I'm using Internet Explorer to post this, so it might be a bit delayed...
But there's a plane heading towards the twin towers right now.
Why is everyone in an Internet café hungry?
Server Not Found.
Interviewer asked me why I'd make a good waiter?
Me: You could say I...bring a lot to the table.
When I was interviewed for a job in the chemistry department, they asked me if I had lab experience.
I said I was more of a cat person.
I went for my interview to be a bus driver
I told them 'Sorry I'm late'
They said 'you're hired'
Hello everyone. I'm using Internet explorer so I hope this gets out in time.
Happy New Year 2006
How many internet users does it take to change a light-bulb?
I dunno. Let's just sign a petition so that hopefully somebody will do it.
Interviewer: What's your greatest weakness?
Me: Answering the semantics of a question but ignoring the pragmatics
Interviewer: Could you give me an example?
Me: Yes I could
Interviewer: You said you are quick in mathematics, could you tell me what is a two hundred and fifty times eighty whole divided by sixty nine?
Man: Six thousand eight hundred and fourty five.
Interviewer: Hm... that's not the right answer...
Man: But i'm quick.
Interviewer: Name one of your accomplishments
Applicant:Well I discovered aliens, outside my house and managed to learn their language.
Interviewer:That seems rather complicated...
Applicant:Well Spanish isn't hard to learn sir.
Interviewer: Where were you born?
Me: Missouri.
I: What state are you in now?
M: Apathy.
I: That's not what I meant.
M: I don't care.
Interviewer: What would you say is your greatest weakness?
Achilles: *sweats nervously*
What did Montenegro's internet domain name say when it broke up with Yugoslavia?
It's not yu it's me.
In my interview for the binman job, I asked if you needed any special training...
The interviewer said "nah you just sort of pick it up as you go along".
Interviewer: What's your strength?
Candidate: I fall in love easily.
Interviewer: What's your weakness?
Candidate: Those blue eyes of yours.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I've never been interrupted while m**...
I've always had the pleasure of never being interrupted while m**.... I don't know if it's because I play it safe or the people next to me just don't want to be rude.
Interviewer: "I heard you were extremely quick at math"
Me: "yes, as a matter of fact I am"
Interviewer: "Whats 14x27"
Me: "49"
Interviewer: "that's not even close"
me: "yeah, but it was fast"
Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give?
Farmer: Which one? The Black one or the brown one?
Interviewer: Brown one.
Farmer: A couple of litres per day.
Interviewer: And the black one?
Farmer: A couple of litres per day.
Interviewer(naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to eat?
Farmer: Which one? Black or brown?
Interviewer: Black.
Farmer: It eats grass.
Interviewer: And the other one?
Farmer: Grass.
Interviewer(now annoyed) : Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same?!
Farmer: Because the black one's mine.
Interviewer: Oh, and the brown one?
Farmer: It's also mine.
My daughter's got an interview for a job working in the adult entertainment industry today…
I hope she blows it…
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Interview with a stage magician
* So, what do you do?
* I saw women in half.
* Do you have any family?
* Four half sisters.
An international conference was being held..
In which USA, North Korea, Europe and Africa were taking part.
The judge said,"I would like to hear your opinions about shortage of food in the rest of the world, if you have any questions, please feel free to ask us".
African president asked, "What is food?".
Europe asked, "What is Short?".
USA asked, "What is the rest of the world?".
North Korea asked, "What is Opinion?".
What was the internet technicians dying words?
Tell my WiFi love her
The interviewer asked me, "What's your biggest strength?"
I took a piece of paper out of my pocket and read from it, "My biggest strength is that I'm always prepared."
The interwiewer asked. What's your biggest flaw?
I interfere in others conversations.
I was talking to him.
Sorry
Interviewer: What's your biggest strength?
Me: I'm a fast learner.
Interviewer: What's 11 * 11?
Me: 65.
Interviewer: Not even close. It's 121.
Me: It's 121.
Interviewer : "Just imagine you're in the 20th floor of a building and it's on fire. How will you escape?"
"It's simple.. I will just stop my imagination."
The internet is so full of people making up fake stories for fake internet points that no one is giving any credit to the real heroes anymore...
Like me, who just yesterday beat up a volcano
Interviewer: Why should we hire you as a reverse psychologist?
Me: You shouldn't.
How did the interrogators get the black man to talk?
They took him to the movies.
When interviewing the police officers involved in Tiger Woods' arrest, they told how they came to suspect he was under the influence.
"Simple" The officer responded. "It was the straightest drive he's had in years. We knew right away something was up."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The internet is like a choose your own adventure game
Where every adventure ultimately ends with me m**...
My internet stopped working for some time so I went out of my room to see my family
They were nice people
What international disaster occurred after someone dropped the Christmas dinner?
The downfall of Turkey, the overthrow of Greece and the destruction of China.
Another interview joke
During a job interview, the interviewer asks, I noticed a 6 year gap in your resume. How do you account for this period of time?
The applicant responds, I went to Yale.
Excited, the interviewer says, Yale?!? You're hired!
The applicant replies, Yay! I got a yob!
Interviewer: So, tell me about yourself.
Me: I'd rather not... I kinda want this job.
I like my internet like my water.
Neutral
How to go through intersection in a tank
1) Approach intersection
2) Check if there is another tank coming
3) Proceed
The internet pre 2008
where the women were men,
the men were boys,
and the children were FBI
Interviewer: So Japan, I hear that you're the least obese country in the world. How did you achieve this?
Japan: Ah. So did I ever tell you what happened the last time we had a Fat Man in Japan?
If anyone is interested, I'll be signing books today at Barnes & Noble from 6 pm...
until I'm removed by security.
interviewer: it says here you went to Harvard University.
Me: yeah, I was visiting my sister.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When interviewer asks you what you make at your current job
Apparently they don't expect you to say s**... mistakes and inappropriate comments.
When interacting with police follow their instructions carefully
Me: [hears knock on door] "Who is it?"
Trooper: "State Police identify yourself."
Me: "Police identify yourself"
Trooper: "State Police"
Me: "Police"
The interviewer asked me to show him an example of leadership skills.
"OK," I replied. "I'm hired."
It's interesting how different a US president looks at the end of their presidency. Obama had gray hair. Bush had a bunch of wrinkles..
At the end of JFKs presidency, half of his head was missing.
Interviewer: What is your greatest strength?
Me: I'm very determined.
Interviewer: OK, we'll call you when we make our decision.
Me: Great! I'll just wait here then.
Interviewer - Okay, describe yourself in 3 words
Lazy
It's interesting how different parts of the country have different ways of saying the same thing.
For instance, in most parts of the country, having an income of $100k or more is called "making six figures".
However, here in San Francisco, we call that same thing "living above the poverty line".
I got an internship job at a nudist camp
I'm doing it for the exposure
Interviewer to Pelè: Do you think Barzil's 1970 team can beat today's argentina?
Pelè: Yes.
Interviewer: By how much?
Pelè: 1:0
Interviewer: That's it?
Pelè: Well, most of us are over 75 now...
I went for an interview for a labouring job
The boss said starting pay is £60 a day, and after six months it goes up to £80. When do you want to start?
I said in 6 months
At the interview for my new job I was asked
"What would your friends say are your weaknesses?"
"I don't have any!" Was my reply.
The interviewer seemed a little surprised and answered: "That can't be true. Everybody has some weak points."
Whereupon I said: "Oh no. You got that wrong. I meant I don't have any friends."
I used to be interested in dinosaurs as a kid, but I'm more into birds now.
I guess you could say my interests have really evolved.
I went for an interview at IKEA.
The manager greeted me by saying, "Come in, make a seat."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Interviewer asked me to name my most positive quality
Turns out h**... won't get you a job
Interesting fact: the sun makes up 99.86% of the solar system's mass!
The rest is your mama
Why do interns make the best Dungeons and Dragons players?
They do it for the Experience.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
On this international women's day I would like to say to all women everywhere
Thank you for your c**...
Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
Asking for a friend.
So I had an interview last year
The interviewer: You answers should be quick
Me: Ok
Interviewer: what is 1490/52?
Me:quick
An interviewer goes to the house of a millionaire..
Interviewer:- Who made you into a millionaire?
Millionaire:- My wife..
Interviewer:- Nice. What were you before being a millionaire?
Millionaire:- A Billionaire....
Interviewer: Do you have any question about the job that you are applying for?
Applicant: How much is the salary?
Interviewer: Initially $40,000. Later it could go up to $80,000
Applicant: I will start later then.
Interviewer : What's your biggest strength?
Me : I'm good at Machine Learning
Interviewer : Okay, what's 21+17
Me : It's 5
Interviewer : Not even close. It's 38
Me : It's 20
Interviewer : I said it's 38
Me : It's 35
Interviewer : It's still 38....
Me : It's 38
Interviewer : Hired!
