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Integrity Jokes

34 integrity jokes and hilarious integrity puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about integrity that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Integrity Short Jokes

Short integrity jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The integrity humour may include short honesty jokes also.

  1. What do you get when you cross a cow and an octopus? A reprimand from the Scientific Ethics and Integrity Committee and an immediate withdrawal of your grant funding.
  2. A Muslim guy killed 50 people in a mass shooting… Who says they can't integrate into American culture?
  3. Why was e^x so lonely at the party? Because every time he tried to integrate, he ended up with himself.
  4. Why don't white supremacists take calculus in high school? They don't want to see integration in their schools
  5. Math jokes never work on me I have trouble differentiating them. They aren't an integral part of my life and most of the time they just don't add up.
  6. Why aren't there any Calculus teachers in Little Rock, Arkansas? Because everyone there hates integration.
  7. TIL several states in the South banned calculus from schools in the 1950's. Apparently they opposed integration.
  8. Did you know that calculus was never taught in southern schools before the 1960s? They didn't believe in integration.
  9. A gay woman, a working class white guy, an old Jewish lady, a disabled man and a young black lady all walk into a bar. What a wonderful example of a well-integrated community.
  10. Why can't Trump supporters ever get into higher levels of mathematics? Cause they can't grasp the concept of integration.
    (all credits to my friend if he reads it here but didn't post it himself!)

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Integrity One Liners

Which integrity one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with integrity? I can suggest the ones about loyalty and correctness.

  1. Why don't they teach Calculus in the Deep South? Because they don't like integration.
  2. Why is the south bad at calculus? They don't know how to integrate.
  3. Why is teaching calculus so difficult in the South? They hate integration
  4. Why doesn't Alabama have calculus teachers. They don't like integration.
  5. Hey gurl are you an integral? Because I'd gladly replace my x with u.
  6. Hey girl, are you an integral? Because I'd like to find the area under your curves
  7. Calculus jokes should be an integral part of this sub
  8. What's the integral of 1/(cabin)? A natural log cabin.
  9. What's the integral of 1/(cabin)? 1 natural log cabin.
    I'll show myself out.
  10. White folk hate math. Especially when they heard in Calculus they'd have to integrate.
  11. Never drink and derive You'll integrate something you don't need.
  12. How do you use calculus in real life? You integrate it
  13. why do white supremacists hate calculus? It really pushed their *limits* on *integration*
  14. How do you spot muslim immigrants in a math class? They are really bad at integrating.
  15. Why didn't 2x befriend x^2 ? He had trouble integrating

Integrity joke, Why didn't 2x befriend x^2 ?

Silly Integrity Jokes for a Good Time with Friends

What funny jokes about integrity you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ethics jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make integrity pranks.

From how high can you drop an egg onto a concrete floor without breaking it?

Higher than you would think, the structural integrity of a well laid concrete floor renders it virtually indestructible towards an incoming egg, even at terminal velocity.

All the mathematical functions went to a party...

There they saw the exponential function sitting by himself
They poked him, "c'mon man, join the party"
To which he replied, "it's not my fault, eveytime I try to integrate, I just end up with myself"

An engineer, a mathematician, and a physicist are asked to measure the volume of a pig.

The engineer answers: "we fill a pool to the brim with water, fully immerse the pig, collect the spilled water and measure its weight. The pig will have a volume of 1dm^3 per collected Kg."
The mathematician answers: "we freeze the pig, slice it and integrate the slices' areas to obtain a volume."
The physicist answers: "let P be a spherical, friction-less pig...

A farmer walks past a tombstone that says: Here lies a lawyer, an honest man, a man of integrity.

The peasant crosses himself and says scared: "Blessed v**..., three men buried in the same grave!"

e^x, x and x^2 went to a party.

x and x^2 noticed e^x has been standing in the same corner since they arrived.
x asked "Why don't you go mix in with the crowd?"
e^x replied "Well, no matter how much I integrate it's still the same!"

I found out my friend is addicted to math.

I should have known. All the sines were there. He had a hard time functioning, and he would go off on tangents all the time. Such a shame - he was in his prime, his life was on a great vector. He wanted to write the next 'Matrix'. But now, he can't differentiate between what is real and what is imaginary. It's so complex. I'm afraid his problems will start to multiply exponentially, and he just doesn't understand the root of it all. Pretty soon he won't be able to integrate at all. And just to add to the trouble, those he defines as 'friends' just want to divide his space between themselves. I'm afraid soon he'll go off into the Great Unknown...

Why did the k**... fail calculus?

Because they hated integration so much.

Integrity joke, Why did the k**... fail calculus?