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Insurance Agent Jokes

18 insurance agent jokes and hilarious insurance agent puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about insurance agent that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Insurance Agent Short Jokes

Short insurance agent jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The insurance agent humour may include short insurance company jokes also.

  1. My insurance agent asked if I had ever hit a deer. I told him that I had but in my defense he swung first.
  2. Insurance shopping Insurance agent: how many accidents have you had sir?
    Dad: 1
    Insurance agent: when was that?
    ...puts phone on hold...
    Dad: Son, what is you birthdate again?
  3. A clown tries to get insurance for his company, but the agent says Agent: Sorry, we don't do any funny business here.
  4. What's the difference between a insurance agent and a s**... bomber? A s**... bomber only bothers you once

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Insurance Agent One Liners

Which insurance agent one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with insurance agent? I can suggest the ones about estate agent and insurance policy.

  1. What did the insurance agent say to Adam & Eve? "It looks like you're not covered."
  2. Why don't insurance agents like bakers? They are far too whisk-y.
  3. What do you calls a life insurance agent ripe with flesh eating bacteria? A lepper-con
  4. My life insurance agent is a great friend. He promised to never say you're dead to me.
  5. Honesty is the best policy... Not quite if you're an insurance agent.

Unearthly Funniest Insurance Agent Jokes to Tickle Your Sides

What funny jokes about insurance agent you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean real estate agent jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make insurance agent pranks.

An insurance agent approaches a cowboy, trying to sell him an accident policy.

The agent inquires, "Have you ever had an accident?"
"Never," the cowboy responds. "However, just recently a horse kicked in two of my ribs, and back a couple years ago a rattlesnake bit my ankle."
"Wouldn't you call these accidents?" says the puzzled agent.
"Nah," the cowboy replies. "They both did it on purpose!"

The other day my house caught fire.

The insurance agent said, "Shouldn't be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?" I said, "Fire and theft." Insurance agent frowned. "Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft." Apparently, the only way I can make a claim with this coverage is if the house is robbed WHILE it's burning down.

I phoned my insurance agent earlier and asked him for a quote.

He said " I have nothing to declare but my genius. Oscar Wilde, 1882 ".
I replied "Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. Oscar Wilde, 1882 ".

An insurance agent was talking to a prospective client at her home.

When she noticed a beautiful vase. She asked her client, "do you keep anything in it?"
"My husband's ashes", the client replied.
"I am so sorry", apologized the agent, "I did not know he was deceased."
"He isn't - he's just too lazy to hunt for an ashtray."

The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy.


The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions.
"Ever have an accident?"
"Nope, nary a one."
"None? You've never had any accidents."
"Nope. Ain't had one. Never."
"Well, you said in this form you were bitten by a snake once. Wouldn't you consider that an accident?"
"Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."