JokoJokes

Inspect Jokes

48 inspect jokes and hilarious inspect puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about inspect that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Inspect Short Jokes

Short inspect jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The inspect humour may include short peek jokes also.

  1. Last night I woke up, startled, to a female's voice coming from my desktop. Hello, it said, It's me. Upon further inspection,
    I realized it was just
    a Dell.
  2. Sherlock Holmes Sherlock Holmes is inspecting a bed. He says to Watson, "this bed is missing something." Watson replies "no sheet sherlock."
  3. A young woman walks into a dry cleaner She asks the elderly owner inspecting her blouse how long it would take to clean.
    Hard of hearing the man asks, "come again?"

    She responds, "No, it's yogurt"
  4. I was watching an episode of "How it's Made" that was all
    about how they make mirrors.
    I'd like to be the guy that has to inspect the mirrors. That's a job I could really see myself doing.
  5. I applied for work at a furniture factory and they said they had an opening for someone to inspect the mirrors. I told them, "That's a job I could really see myself doing"
  6. A Rich man sent a medicine shipment to Somalia Once it reached the Airport inspection, Customs rejected it and sent it back;
    the instructions on the medicines said : after meal
  7. What looks exactly like a camel from a distance, but on close inspection isn't a camel at all? a marlboro.
  8. I just crashed into the back of a dwarf driver.... He gets out of the car inspects the rear bumper and goes up my window. "I'm not happy" he said "well which one are you then?"
  9. A kind man gave me some gold for free But I am a fool, for upon closer inspection I discovered it was pyrite.
  10. Job offered: joined the exciting field of TSA Title: TSA inspections officer
    Location: Florida
    Starting date: Immediately
    Pay: Eventually

Share These Inspect Jokes With Friends




Inspect One Liners

Which inspect one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with inspect? I can suggest the ones about probe and observe.

  1. I'd love to get myself a job inspecting mirrors! I could really see myself doing that.
  2. How long did the underwear inspection take? A few minutes, it was only a brief evaluation
  3. Why did the guitar shop fail a fire safety inspection? No Stairway.
  4. What do interested chemists and 12 year-old hackers have in common? Inspect element
  5. What is the first thing they do at boot camp? Take the privates out and inspect them.
  6. A failure in a device will never appear until it has passed final inspection.
  7. What did the General see when he inspected his Army? His Handy of course.
  8. I put my USDA inspected chicken s**... in my wallet. Now my legal tender is safe.
  9. TIL - that Adolf h**... was inspecting his U-Boat fleet one day and got on the Wrong sub

Inspect joke, TIL - that Adolf h**... was inspecting his U-Boat fleet one day and got on the

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about inspect can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of inspect puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Playful Inspect Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group

What funny jokes about inspect you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean examine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make inspect prank.

A DEA agent and a rancher

A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas and talked with an old rancher. He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."
The rancher said, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there.....", as he pointed out the location.
The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me!"
Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.
"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land!! No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?!!"
The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull.
With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.
The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.....
"Your badge, show him your BADGE.........!!"

DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas...

DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas , and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay, but do not go in that field over there," as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish . . . . On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?"
The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull . . . . . .
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored
before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified.
The rancher runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs . . . . . "Your Badge, show him your Badge!"

The Wire Brush

An Army officer decides to inspect soldiers recovering in one of the field hospitals he commands. He marches into one of the tents, goes up to the first private he sees and barks, "What's your affliction, private?" 
Standing at attention, "Venereal warts, SIR!"
He then asks, "And what treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush every day, SIR!"
Finally he asks, "And what's your ambition, soldier?"
"To get back to the frontline, SIR!"
He goes up to the next private, "What's your affliction, private?" 
"Chronic piles, SIR!"
"And what treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush every day, SIR!"
"And what's your ambition, soldier?"
"To get back to the frontline, SIR!"
On it went until the officer had nearly made it through the whole ward.  He goes up to the last private, looking like he may die at any moment.
Taking it down a notch, "What's your affliction, son?" 
"Gingivitis, sir."
"And what treatment are you getting?"
"Five minutes with the wire brush every day, sir."
"And what's your ambition, soldier?"
"TO GET THE WIRE BRUSH BEFORE THOSE OTHER GUYS, SIR!!"

Deputy Investigation goes Wrong.

WASHINGTON COUNTY SHERIFF 'S DEPT. Investigation
A Deputy stops at a dairy farm and talks with the old farmer who's the owner.
He tells the farmer, 'I need to inspect your property for i**... grown m**....'
The old Farmer says, 'Okay, but don't go in that field over there.'
The officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me"!! Pointing to the badge on his chest he proudly says,
"See this badge"!? "This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish…on any land". "No questions asked or answers given". "Have I made myself clear!!??" "Do you understand!!??"
The old farmer nods politely and goes about his chores.
Later, the old guy hears loud screams and spies the deputy running for his life and close behind is the a huge breeder bull.
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer.
The officer is clearly terrified.
The old farmer immediately throws down his **** fork, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....
"Your badge! Show him your F**king badge!"

There's a car accident in a neighborhood

A guy in an old, beat up station wagon rear ends another guy in a brand new Porsche. Both drivers get out of their cars to inspect the damage and they see that the back of the Porsche is totaled but station wagon's front fender doesn't have a scratch on it.
The owner of the Porsche is livid with rage that this dolt hit him and wrecked his new car. So he goes into his car and comes back with a piece of chalk and a baseball bat. He draws a circle on the ground around the driver of the station wagon and tells him if he leaves that circle he'll beat him to death with the baseball bat.
Then the Porsche driver goes to town on the station wagon, getting all his fury out destroying the car. He bashes in the windows, dents up the hood, roof and sides and destroys all the lights. When he comes back to the driver of the station wagon he finds the guy rolling on the ground laughing his head off. Astonished, he asks the guy how he could be laughing so hard after his station wagon was just destroyed.
The guy stops laughing for a second and says, "While you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle *two times*!"

Inspection

While conducting a routine inspection, the colonel arrived at the mess hall door where he met 2 KPs with a large soup kettle.
"Let me taste that," the colonel snapped. One of the men fetched a big spoon and handed it respectfully to the CO, who plunged the ladle into the p**... and took a large mouth-full of the steaming liquid, smacking his lips critically.
Then he let out a roar that could be heard back at headquarters. "Do you call that soup?" He bellowed.
"No, sir," explained one of the KPs. "Its dishwater we were just throwing out"

Jobs of our fathers

The principal of a school was to inspect one of the classes in her school. Before the inspection the head teacher goes to the class and tells the students that to every question from the principal, they need to give an illustrious answer even if it's not true.
The principal arrives. She goes over to little Jimmy and asks him:
"What does your dad do little boy?"
Now Jimmy's father was a poor shoemaker but Jimmy said:
"Oh, he's the owner of this large shoe factory."
She then goes to Timmy and asks him about his father's occupation.
Timmy was also relatively poor, his dad worked as a bricklayer.
"My pops owns a large construction company!" Timmy says smiling.
Finally she asks Ben. Now Ben was so poor, his father didn't have a job, but the local church out of charity let him ring the church's bells.
"Well my dad works as a DJ in the church."

A penguin is driving his car through Arizona...

His engine begins to shudder and overheat, so he pulls off at the nearest exit. As luck would have it, there is a small auto repair shop close to the exit. He drops his car off for the mechanic to inspect and notices an ice cream shop just across the street.
Mr. Penguin chooses a vanilla cone and due to his lack of suitable appendages, gets ice cream all over his face. Upon finishing his cone, he returns to the mechanic to pick up his car. As he approaches the shop the mechanic approaches him and exclaims, "Looks like you blew a seal!" to which Mr. Penguin replies, "Oh no! It's just ice cream, I swear!"

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head just robbed a bank.

They run into a barn to hide from the cops chasing them. Each of them jumps into an empty burlap sack when the cops come in.
The cops see the bags so they inspect them. The cops shakes the red head's bag. "Woof woof !" Says the red head. So the cops move on, thinking that it's just the farmer's dog.
The cops shake the brunette's bag. "Meow!" Says the brunette. So the cops move on.
The cops approach the third sack and shake the bag. The blonde yells "potatoes!"

People from the food stamp office came by today to inspect our store

I hope they didn't make any SNAP judgments

Inspector Gadget walks into a Bar...

He orders a Drink and sits down on his couch.

Black t**...

An older man is in the hospital. A nurse walks in and he asks, "Are my t**... black?" The nurse, taken by surprise replies, "I'm sorry?" So he asks again "Are my t**... black?" Nurse shakes her head but decides to check for him, after all she is a nurse. She lifts his robe, takes his t**... in hand, lifts and inspect them. She lowers his robe, raises back up to him and says " Mr. Johnson, you'll be happy to hear your t**... aren't black." He looks at her, removing his oxygen mask and says, "That's great and all but are my test results back?"

An inspector arrives at m**... scene of an obese man by a cannibal

It was a lot to digest

A guy isn't paying attention and rear ends someone at the traffic lights...

...He gets out of his car to inspect the damage and a dwarf gets out of the other car. He says "I'm not happy, you know"!
The guy says "No? Well which one are you then"?

An inspector, making his rounds, inspects an elementary school.

One teacher says to her class, "Treat him like you would the President of the United States." Sure enough, later that day, the inspector walks in to see how the lesson is doing. Just then, one of the students gets up, stomps over to the inspector, punches him in the gut, nicks his phone, and hides behind a curtain.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" shouts the teacher.
The kid says, "Deleting Twitter."

Inspector in a hospital is interviewing a room full of patients

He asks the first one
- What are you in here with?
- Gonorrhea
- How are they treating you?
- Swab it with iodine
- Any questions or complaints?
- No
So he moves to the next one
- What are you in here with?
- Hemorhoids
- How are they treating you?
- Swab it with iodine
- Any questions or complaints?
- No
He moves to the next one
- What are you in here with?
- Sore t**...
- How are they treating you?
- Swab it with iodine
- Any questions or complaints?
- Yes. Tell them to either change the swab or to swab me first.

What do Inspector Clouseau and a g**... have in common?

They're both Peter Sellers.

What do inspectors in America eat

Inspector meals

So tell me Inspector Gadget,

What's the first thing you do when you buy a s**... robot?

A technician is called to inspect q gas leak at an anesthesiologist's office

Upon arrival, he said: "Huh, this smells like chlorofor".

What did Inspector Newcomen say when Dr. Jekyll ran out of serum?

You can run, but you can't Mr. Hyde.

Anytime I bring something new in the house my dog always has to sniff and inspect what it is..

And I realized that dogs can be pretty nosy.

1937 in Moscow

Moscow. The year is 1937. At around 3 am, a man wakes up to the sound of the door being broken down and he goes to inspect it. He returns to the bedroom where his wife is trembling and crying. "Don't worry my dear, it's just burglars!"

Little kids are always trying to get free Robux.

But they aren't true gamers.
True gamers know about the Inspect Element hack that gets you 99999999 Robux.

Do you know what really grinds my gears?

When my maintenance guys fail to inspect them for the proper mesh and clearance.

How do you confuse an Archaeologist?

Give him a used sanitary towel to inspect and ask him which period it came from...

If Inspector Gadget were a Lady

Would She have Utili-t**...?

Source: Me (Although I'm probably not the first person to ever think of this,)

Inspector Javert gives up on catching Jean Valjean and opens a bakery.

But old habits die hard. The bread is on special, two for $6.01

A local Game Stop burnt to the ground. An insurance adjuster came out to inspect the damage

After looking at the rubble, he asked the manager if the building was a new structure. The manager said, "I don't think so, it was built in the 1970s."
The adjuster said, "I that case, the best payout I can give you is $50,000. If it was a new building I could have given you 95,000.

My dad tried to translate a joke from Spanish to English once.

His English translation:
There was a man driving his Mercedes on a deserted road at night. He reached an old rickety bridge that didn't look strong enough to hold his car. He got out and went to inspect the bridge, and stomped all the way to the other side to make sure it was safe. He decided it was, and turned back to his car and said Mercedes, come.
That's is that's the joke.
Fun fact, in Spanish, the word for -come- is ven and in Spanish, the v sound is pronounced more like the b sound. Mercedes Benz... get it.
Not all jokes translate well.

An inspector goes to a mental institution to check if any of the patients had been cured

When he gets there he places an empty pool on the ground. All the patients start squealing with joy, and jumping in the pool, hurting themselves. Only one patient stands to the side and doesn't jump. The inspector goes to ask him why he isn't jumping. The patient says: do you think I'm crazy? I can't swim

The carpet

An attractive, well-dressed woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian carpets. She looks around, spots a beautiful carpet, and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the texture of the carpet she farts loudly. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed. Standing behind her is a salesman.
"Good day, ma'am, how may I help you today?"
Flustered, she asks, "Yes, uh, how much does this carpet cost?"
"Madam," he answers, "If you f**... just touching it, you're gonna s**... when you hear the price."

Inspector: What do you see ?

Sub-inspector: Idk why but, the suspect is dancing n**... in the middle of the street
Inspector: copy that

Sub-inspector: I'm not much of a dancer, but I'll try my best.

A inspector visits a sanatoriun to check its conditions.

During the tour the director takes him to one of their newly designed test rooms, claiming its foolproof.
"We fill up this bathtub to the brim see? Then we hand to the inmate a spoon and a cup and ask him to empty the tub" Says the director
The inspector nods and replies with a smile "Ah, i see. And the inmate, if sane will choose the cup because it's the biggest."
The director then looks at the inspector and raises a brow "No, the sane one will just open the drain"

One day in artillery instruction, a colonel came to inspect our class.

First up was Private O'Hara. The colonel got in his face and asked him what reading he had on his 105-mm howitzer. "Two-nine-oh-seven, sir," was the reply.
"Soldier," said the colonel, "don't you know you never say 'oh' in the artillery? You say 'zero.' What's your name, soldier?"
"Zero Hara, sir," answered the private.

Inspect joke, One day in artillery instruction, a colonel came to inspect our class.

jokes about inspect

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these inspect jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.