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Inn Jokes

80 inn jokes and hilarious inn puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about inn that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Need an escape from the mundane? Take a break and read this collection of inn jokes featuring premier inn, holiday inn, ramada, hyatt and madrid. A guaranteed guffaw awaits!

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Funniest Inn Short Jokes

Short inn jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The inn humour may include short resort jokes also.

  1. My uncle runs a clinic inside a hotel in Spain He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.

    Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician
  2. A year ago I left home and since, I've only been living at guesthouses and motels. Today I celebrated my inn dependence.
  3. A Chinese pan, an establishment for accommodation and drinks, a number, and Abraham Rockefeller... Wok inn two Abe R.
  4. So I rang the tourist office and asked:- 'What's the quickest way from the Holiday Inn to the museum?'
    'Are you walking or driving?'
    'Driving.'
    'Well, that would be the quickest way.'
  5. I recently got in trouble for bartering alcoholic beverages to quaint hotels. I was charged with Inn Cider trading.
  6. Arthur and Lancelot went to the inn and rented a room for 2 knights. Arthur slept in a king sized bed, Lancelot took the queen.
  7. If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard. I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
  8. What could we call an international chain of hotels catering to vampires? Hema Globe Inns
    (Thoughts on this OC?)
  9. Why couldn't Mary and Joseph get a room at the inn? Well it was Christmas....they should have booked ahead
  10. Who do ghosts call to investigate when they think humans might be haunting their hotel? The inn spectre.

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Inn One Liners

Which inn one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with inn? I can suggest the ones about insomniac and hotel.

  1. I rely on hotels so much I've actually become quite Inn-dependent
  2. Worst pub I've ever been to was called The Fiddle. It really was a vile inn.
  3. The dirtiest pub I've ever seen was called the fiddle It was a vile inn.
  4. The workers at the inn aren't very friendly... they create a hostel environment.
  5. They called it the Fiddle Motel..... ....but it was a vile inn.
  6. What is the highest tavern in Estonia? Tall Inn
  7. Welche vier Flüsse kennt jede Blondine? Rhein, Inn, Main, Po
  8. What do you call a noodle hotel? The Ram Inn
  9. What language do inn keepers speak Innglish
  10. Pub Landlord Required.... Must Have Own Pub...
    Apply with Inn.
  11. Why was there no room at the inn Because it was Christmas
  12. There's a hotel with no bathrooms Its called the Holdinit Inn
  13. I stayed the night at this place called The Shove't Inn, Not what I expected..
  14. Can i enter your tavern? Yes, please hey inn
  15. I found the perfect hotel between a Motel 6 and a Super 8. It's called the Meaty Inn.

Holiday Inn Jokes

Here is a list of funny holiday inn jokes and even better holiday inn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What's green and sings and dances fantastic? Fred Asparagus. (I'm sorry, Holiday Inn was on TCM tonight.)
  • Cross between a Holiday inn and Fidel Castro You get an infidel.
  • Why doesn't Dr. James White eat breakfast at the Holiday Inn? They have terrible *eggs*egesis.
  • Creed front-man Chris Stapp is broke and living in a Holiday Inn... Look on the bright side Chris, this is proof there is a god!
  • Why did the holiday inn change its ne to comfort in? Because the jehovah witness' dont do holidays and the doors are closer together.

No Room At The Inn Jokes

Here is a list of funny no room at the inn jokes and even better no room at the inn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • There was no room at the inn. Joseph and Mary were really furious. What they need is manger management.

Premier Inn Jokes

Here is a list of funny premier inn jokes and even better premier inn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Which hotel chain was Nikita Khrushchev's favourite? Premier Inn.

Amusing & Witty Inn Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about inn you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean holiday inn jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make inn pranks.

A couple of years ago, I was staying at a tiny Spanish Inn

A couple of years ago, I was staying at a tiny spanish Inn when I started to feel ill. Needing a doctor, I rang reception who said they'd get the hotel doctor to visit. I was rather surprised that such a small place would have a house doctor, and was just telling the manager this when my room door burst open and in leapt a man yelling "Nobody expects the Spanish Inn physician!"

I hear that Chad Kroeger from Nickelback, absolutely loves to take part in Nativity plays. He's played a shepherd, the inn keeper and one year, he even played the rear end of the donkey...

But he never made it as a wise man

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Did you hear about the hotel that's only for guys with big d**...?

It's called the Halfway Inn.

George and the Dragon

A poor vagabond, travelling a country road in England, tired and hungry, came to a roadside inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked.
The innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window. "Could ye spare some food?" he asked.
The woman glanced at his shabby clothes and obviously poor condition.
"No!" she said rather sternly.
"Could I have a pint of ale?"
"No!" she snapped again.
"Could I at least sleep in your stable?"
"No!"
By this time, she was fairly shouting.
The vagabond tried again: "Might I please...?"
"What now?" the woman interrupted impatiently.

"Do you suppose I might have a word with George instead?"

No one expects it!

A guy was traveling in the Spanish countryside, and after driving all day he stopped for the night at a tiny inn. The innkeeper, upon giving him his key, asked him if he would like to participate in a battle of wits with his special chicken. "If you stump him, you get a wish, any wish you like!" he explains. The man agrees to it, and he's led into the bar, whereupon sits a healthy sized hen. He proceeds to have a battle of wits, and is roundly defeated by the hen. "I didn't expect the chicken to be so smart!" says the man. "No," says the innkeeper, "no one expects the Spanish inn quiz wish hen!"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

There's a new hotel in town that features glory holes but you'd never know from the name.

The walnut Inn

I was staying the night in a haunted pub

Just as the clock struck midnight a ghostly police officer walked in through the wall and across my room and out through the other wall.
Next morning I told the landlord what I'd seen.
"Oh yes," he said, "that's the inn spectre".

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Couple went to New York and hired a Cab.

He had a broad Southern accent
Cabbies
: "whhhherre are Yaaah
Frumm?"
Wife: "what is he sayin?"
Husband: "asking where we from"
Husband to cabbie: "London"
Cabbie:" whereeee inn Londonn?"
Wife:"what is he sayin?"
Husband to wife: "asking where from in London"
Husband to cabbie: "Stamford"
Cabbie:" Stammfordd , I know the place, was there during the war and had an English girlfriend.
Had the worst s**... of my Life"
Wife:"what is he sayin now?"
Husband: " He says he knows you!!"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What do you call a hotel full of w**...?

A Stuffit Inn.

The Holy Family were unable to participate....

...in the conference call.
There was no Zoom at the inn.

Mama, how did I get my name?

(USA-centric)
"Mama, how did I get my name?"
"Why do you need to know, Loquinda?"
"It's for my homework."
"Well, I was staying at a LaQuinta Inn the night you were conceived. So I just rearranged the letters a bit to make a pretty name."
"Oh. That's cool. How did my brother get his name?"
"Which one, Arvey or Suppurate?"

A corrupt politician manages to sneak a number of loopholes in to a new law that gave him ownership of several hotels in Seville and Valencia

Nobody inspects the Spanish inn decision

A quiet cottage applied to be a part of the Boisterous Domicile Club

They refused him entry.
They said he wouldn't be a loud inn.

Imagine yourself in the 1800s...

You're in a large city with a great port. You're in a nicer part of town, away from the water, in a nice inn. You're having a meal of potatoes. You look down - there's a toe! The toe smells like tar and fish. It stinks. Your neighbor leans over and says, "P.U.! That's not just any toe!! That's a portmanteau!"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Why was Jesus born in a barn?

Because there was no w**... at the inn

Jesus walks into a hotel

He hands the inn keeper 3 nails and asks, "Could you put me up for the night?"

What do you call a Chinese bed-and-breakfast that doesn't take reservations?

Wok Inn

The inn that turned away Joseph and Mary got a horrible Yelp review.

Only one star.

I got a surprisingly big bonus from selling a hotel in Madrid

Nobody expects the Spanish Inn Commission

What do you call hip people that go to bed and breakfasts?

The Inn Crowd

My wife is a doctor at a hotel in Madrid.

Nobody expects the Spanish Inn Physician!

A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old.

One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband that says, "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don't bother waiting up for me."
He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you're not giving me. So I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I'm sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don't you wait up for me."

Had dinner at The Snail Inn last night...

...the service was rather sluggish!

Why was Jesus an only child?

There were no more wombs at the Inn.

After summer vacation classic

All the children inn school were asked to write on the chalkboard something significant that happened over the summer.
Anne gets up and writes the word puppies on the board, and says our dog had puppies this summer. Very nice says the teacher. George gets up and writes promotion on the board, acc says my dad got a promotion. Excellent! Very significant goes the teacher. Little Johnny gets up and puts a dot on the board. The treachery looks at out and says Johnny what's that dot why is it significant? He good it's not a dot, it's a period, I'm not sure why it's significant but my sister missed hers and my dad shot our neighbor and went to jail!

So this Arab guy is crawling through the desert

stranded and dehydrated, he comes upon a Jewish guy selling ties."water water! I need water!" He says.
"I don't have any water but I have some ties; you want to buy some ties?"
"No no I need water! where can I get water?!"
The salesman replies : "40 miles east there's an inn; you can find some there."
3 days later the Arab comes crawling back; his face is on fire; and comes back to the salesman who exclames, "did you find the water?".
"No, they wouldn't let me in without a tie!"

Maths Teacher told us this spicy one today

A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old.
One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband.
It says: "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don't bother waiting up for me."
He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you're not giving me. So, I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I'm sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don't YOU wait up for ME."

This just inn:

A news-worthy hotel.

I work at a hotel and accidentally smashed a crate.

RIP inn box

Simple mathematics

A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old.
One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband that says, "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me.
I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don't bother waiting up for me."
He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you're not giving me. So I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students.
Being a math professor, I'm sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don't you wait up for me."

jokes about inn