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Indulgence Jokes

22 indulgence jokes and hilarious indulgence puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about indulgence that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Indulgence Short Jokes

Short indulgence jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The indulgence humour may include short addiction jokes also.

  1. I was talking to the anorexic cannibal.. I told him self-indulgence isn't the answer and he needs to face his problems.
    He threw up his arms and walked away.
  2. Ancient Romans believed the 54th birthday was the time to indulge in all your crazy impulses. You only LIV once.
  3. Dark humor is like food... I indulged in an unhealthy amount of it today, and now i want to kill myself.
  4. My English teacher marked me down for using jerking off as a metaphor for self-indulgence but I really think the court order was uncalled for.
  5. Last night I let my boyfriend indulge his "s**..." fantasy...
    I'm glad I got that off my chest.
  6. Christmas time. v**... and wine. Children indulging in serious crime. With dad on the w**... and mum's high on crack. Christmas is special when your family is black!
  7. I haven't told anyone but last night I let my husband indulge his "s**..." f**.... I'm glad I got that off my chest.
  8. I can't believe I got arrested, just for indulging in a bit of horseplay. Although the prosecutor is calling it b**...'.
  9. I hired a p**... to indulge my food f**.... She said that for $500 we could spend the night l**... food off each other's bodies, although if I wanted guacamole it was $1.80 extra.
  10. My girlfriend asked me to help indulge her f**... of covering herself in cake flour, butter, and eggs. I had to say no. My mother taught me it's wrong to batter women.

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Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about indulgence can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of indulgence puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Humorous Indulgence Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life

What funny jokes about indulgence you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean luxury jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make indulgence prank.

Three desperately ill men go to their docter seeking help.


One is and alcoholic, One is a chain s**... and the other is gay.
The doctor tells the men if you indulge in any of your habits again you will die.
So the three men leave and then the alcoholic sees a bar and hears its loud music and can't resist.
He orders a shot of whisky drinks it and suddenly drops down dead the other two men walk out side realising how serious this is, but then the chain s**... sees a half a ciggarette on the ground still burning so the gay guy says to the chain s**... "if you bend over to pick that up were both dead"

A guy goes into this bar, sits down and orders a drink.


While waiting, he sees a guy sitting at the bar who has a very big muscular body but a little tiny head.
So, he asks the guy, "How is it that you have such a huge body and a small head?"
The guy replied, "I was walking along the beach one day and I came across this bottle buried halfway in the sand. So I picked it up, brushed away the sand, and out popped this fine female genie. She said she would grant me three wishes for releasing her."
"For my first wish, I asked for ten-million dollars, and p**... right there on the sand was $10,000,00."
"For my second wish, I asked for a luxury yacht, and p**... right there on the ocean was a 90-foot yacht."
"Finally for my third wish, I asked to have s**... with the genie, but she said that genies were not allowed to indulge in that kind of activities."
So, I said, "c'mon, how about a little head?"

Dork Ruined Joke Then Deleted It Because He Couldn't Stand The Downvotes: Reposted Right

An American gentleman arranged a liaison with a Japanese lady. As they were indulging in s**... i**..., she repeatedly shouted a Japanese word which he did not understand but took to mean "Wonderful" or something similar which increased his ardor, his efforts with the lady, and his enjoyment, as well as her apparent enjoyment because she kept shouting that word.
The next day, he played golf with some Japanese business associates and hit a hole in one. In elation, he shouted out the same word his poule de nuit had been shouting the night before. One of the Japanese gentlemen present, perplexed, asked, "What do you mean "'wrong hole'"?

Sunday in an Irish church

It was a sunday after St. Patrick's day in the church of a small village in the west of Ireland. Obviously all the people were more or less hungover, which infuriated the pastor of the village.
"It's a disgrace how we celebrate our most important saint by indulging in binge drinking and other improper activities. If I could have all the wine in the world, I would throw it in the river!"
There was a wave of murmur among the churchgoers.
"If I could have all the beer in the world, I would throw it in the river as well!"
The people put their heads down in guilt, thinking about what they had done.
"If I could have all the SPIRITS in the world, I would throw them in the river with the beer and the wine!"
Now the church was completely silent.
After a short while, the musical conductor of the church spoke up, "Now let us sing the hymn number 369, 'Shall We Gather at the River?'"
---
I heard this story from the ambassador of Ireland in Finland.

Sunday in church after St. Patrick's Day

It was a sunday after St. Patrick's day in the church of a small village in the west of Ireland. Obviously all the people were more or less hungover, which infuriated the pastor of the village.
"It's a disgrace how we celebrate our most important saint by indulging in binge drinking and other improper activities. If I could have all the wine in the world, I would throw it in the river!"
There was a wave of murmur among the churchgoers.
"If I could have all the beer in the world, I would throw it in the river as well!"
The people put their heads down in guilt, thinking about what they had done.
"If I could have all the SPIRITS in the world, I would throw them in the river with the beer and the wine!"
Now the church was completely silent.
After a short while, the musical conductor of the church spoke up, "Now let us sing hymn number 369, *'Shall We Gather at the River?'*"
---
I heard this story from the ambassador of Ireland in Finland.

An alcoholic, a s**... and a gay guy go to a psychiatrist

An alcoholic, a s**... and a gay guy go to a psychiatrist.
The psychiatrist evaluates their addictions and warns them, "If you indulge in your bad habit ONE MORE TIME, you will drop dead."
So the three men acknowledge his warning and leave the clinic.
As they walked down the sidewalk, discussing their fate, the Alcoholic proclaims, "I don't care what happens to me! I need a drink!" He runs into a bar, takes a shot of whiskey, and drops dead.
The s**... and gay guy--shocked that the psychiatrist was telling the truth--continue walking.
A few minutes later they see a full cigarette burning on the sidewalk. The s**... starts to sweat. And looks over at the gay guy. "I just need ONE MORE drag!"
The gay guy says, "Honey, if you bend down to pick that up, we're BOTH gonna drop dead!"

My friend is a prison warden currently doing sensitivity training. His homework entails "What would you do if you saw two curious inmates indulging in i**...? "

I said "Why can't we just let bi-cons be bi-cons?!"

A man dies in an accident

He never drank, nor smoked. He never had s**... and never indulged in anything unhealthy.
The Life Insurance Company refused the claim on the note that 'How can someone have died if he had never lived in the first place?'

A Catholic Priest and an Orthodox Rabbi are talking with one another...

The Priest says to the Rabbi, "Rabbi, you keep Kosher, correct?" To which the Rabbi replies, "Of course, father." The Priest then asks, "But have you ever broken kosher?" The Rabbi then says, "I admit that I have. When I was a young man I once indulged myself in ham, and in doing so broke Kosher." "That's very interesting," remarks the priest, "for I am free to eat as much ham as I please."
"What about you, father," begins the Rabbi, "you keep celibate, do you not?" The preist replies, "Of course, Rabbi." "But," continues the Rabbi, "have you always kept so?" The Preist then says, "I admit, I have not. When I was a young man I once shared the night with a woman."
The Rabbi then leans in and asks, "It's better than ham, isn't it?"

Two fishermen are sitting in a boat indulging in some wordplay.

The first one says, "If I tell you a joke that relies on *casting* the word "rod" in a p**... sense, would you find it *fishy*?"
"Oh," says the second one, "I think I can *tackle* it."
"So... *net-net*, you'd take the *bait*?"
"Oh-h**...! *Hook, line, and sinker*!"
"I don't mean to *lure* you..."
"Ha-ha! Brilliant, old chap! So, let's... *sea*: we've covered fishing tackle, bait, rods... what did we forget?"
"Well, I think we've covered it. After all, the *reel* jokes are in the comments."

Two couples decide to spend the weekend away together at a posh hotel......

When they get there, one girl suggests they indulge in partner-swapping as a trial. After 2 hours of solid s**... by the fireside, a girl turned to her new partner and said, "Wow! This is the very best s**... I've had in years! I wonder how the guys are doing?"

The inmates of an asylum are playing a game called "ripe mango"

It consists of the inmates climbing a tree in the facility and yelling "ripe mango", before letting go and falling to the ground. The director of the asylum passes by and chuckes and one of the inmates calls him to play.
The director, just to indulge them, climbs the tree but yells "unripe mango!". He didn't want, as expected, to hit the ground. Seeing this one of the inmates says "bring me a stone!!! I'm taking that son of a b**... down! "

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these indulgence jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.