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Incontinent Jokes

29 incontinent jokes and hilarious incontinent puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about incontinent that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Incontinent Short Jokes

Short incontinent jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The incontinent humour may include short incontinence jokes also.

  1. An elderly man has urinary incontinence. Why does he drink holy water before going to bed on Christmas Eve? He wanted to sleep in heavenly pees.
  2. I asked my incontinent father-in-law if he wanted anything from the store,he replied ... "Depends"
  3. We are sorry to announce that we are out of diapers, Poise, and Attends. We apologize for any incontinence.
  4. Inconvenience is waiting in line to use the bathroom Incontinence is not waiting in line to use the bathroom.
  5. My friend wanted me to support to his faecal incontinence charity I said I'm sorry but I can't get behind it
  6. Did you hear about the incontinent tomato grower? He soiled his plants! They've never been happier.
  7. I phoned the incontinence clinic emergency helpline today ... They asked "where are you ringing from?"
    I replied "the waist down".
  8. What do you call an incontinent defensive player in American football? A piddle linebacker
  9. One old man was talking to another "Hows your incontinence?"
    "Depends."
  10. What do you call someone that can't stop urinating all over the world? Traveling incontinence.

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Incontinent One Liners

Which incontinent one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with incontinent? I can suggest the ones about incapable and uncontrollable.

  1. Did you hear about the incontinent woodworker? He specialised in staining chairs
  2. What do you call someone who wears a diaper fashioned from a map? Incontinent
  3. "Incontinence hotline... ...can you hold?"
  4. Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent? Ctrl-P
  5. Printer jam Why couldn't the incontinent person print?
    They couldn't Ctrl-P
  6. What medical condition are elderly bats most afraid of? Incontinence.
  7. Well you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm incontinent
    No time to talk.
  8. Finding out my spouse was disabled and incontinent... Was a wife-changing experience.
  9. Hi, you've reached the Urinary Incontinence Department. Please hold.
  10. I gave my incontinent friend some adult diapers... He's a changed man now.
  11. Why did the incontinent museum director get fired? He kept gushing over the gallery.
  12. Laughter is the best medicine Except for incontinence.
  13. Why did the incontinent man fall down at the bar? He had a loose stool.
  14. What do you call someone with urinary incontinence? The Leaky Cauldron
  15. Why can't the earth hold its liquids? incontinents
Incontinent joke, Why can't the earth hold its liquids?

Charming Humor Incontinent Jokes with Loads of Fun

What funny jokes about incontinent you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean irresponsible jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make incontinent pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

You hear the one about the incontinent boy scout?

s**... intense.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

What do Australians and wetting yourself in the basement have in common?

They're both incontinence down under.

I've recently had severe bowel incontinence, so I decided to consult my doctor before starting up a daily powerwalking routine...

When I asked how my condition will affect my walks, my doctor responded, "Nothing severe, but you never know when the walks will turn into the runs."

Incontinent joke, Well you can tell by the way I use my walk