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Income Jokes

85 income jokes and hilarious income puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about income that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh away your tax troubles with these hilarious income jokes! From funny tax deductions to the IRS, get ready to giggle away and enjoy a moment of light-heartedness. Discover quirky income tax return jokes, tax jokes, fixed income jokes, and more! Put a smile on your face while helping you understand and embrace income inequality.

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Funniest Income Short Jokes

Short income jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The income humour may include short earning jokes also.

  1. If I had a dollar for everytime someone called me a boring nerd.. I'd have a mean daily income of $5.64 with a standard deviation of $1.25
  2. Horse walks into a bar, bartender asks why the long face? Horse replies, The bank denied my home loan because I don't have stable income.
  3. Deep. Pessimist sees nothing but dark in the tunnel.
    Optimist sees light in the end of the tunnel.
    Realist sees light from incoming train.
    Engine-driver sees three idiots standing on the track.
  4. Why doesn't Sherlock Holmes pay any income tax? Because he makes so many brilliant deductions.
  5. Sure passive income is great, but do you know how much you can make with passive aggressive income? You know what, never mind. Forget I even mentioned it…
  6. What do you call the an ant in a colony who is responsible for establishing incoming trade deals with other ant colonies? Import-ant
  7. After having his title stripped and funds cut off by the royal family, Harry has taken up painting to supplement his income. He's the Artist formerly known as Prince.
  8. I've invented a rocket that intercepts incoming warheads by consuming them. It's a cannibalistic missile.
  9. Bad joke incoming 4 Norse gods, 1 roman god, and 2 astrological bodies walk into a bar. The bartender says "This is gonna be a week joke"
  10. If you tell a really incredible story about making money... It's an incomparable income parable.

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Income One Liners

Which income one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with income? I can suggest the ones about wealth and profit.

  1. What are pornstars paid? Income.
  2. How do prostitutes get paid? Income
  3. How do you know if a fisherman is rich? Check his net income.
  4. Everyone should pay their income tax with a smile I tried - but they wanted cash.
  5. I invented a relish made out of my own cash. It's my main sauce of income.
  6. What's another term for a "dead end job"? "Income without outcome".
  7. I got a job cleaning horse manure. Well, the ad promise a stable income.
  8. I think income based tuition is a terrible idea... Because art degrees would be free
  9. The light at the end of the tunnel... might just be an incoming train.
  10. Dog named Tax There once was a dog named Tax. I opened the door and income Tax.
  11. I need to find a better job I can't even pay my income tax
  12. Cringe Incoming What do you call a smart cylinder?
    A graduated cylinder 😜
  13. If a guy loses his source of income he usually loses also his main source of expenses.
  14. Why did the horse apply to work at a farm? He wanted a stable income.
  15. How would you describe an anti-vaxxer family with three children? Double income, no kids.

Income Tax Jokes

Here is a list of funny income tax jokes and even better income tax puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What's the difference between Donald Trump, and someone working at McDonald's ? The guy working at McDonald's has to pay income taxes.
  • Why do underground hackers report their income to the IRS? They know how the system will react to sin tax errors
  • A man admitted he lied on his income tax return: he listed himself as the head of the household!
  • Guess which Avenger paid the least taxes this year? Spiderman, because his entire income was net income
  • What happens to people who don't pay their income taxes? They run for president.
  • The difference between the short and long income tax forms is simple.
    If you use the short form, the government gets your money.
    If you use the long form, the tax advisor gets your money.
  • A man admitted he lied on his income tax return: he listed himself as the head of the household!
  • When it comes time to claiming kids on your income tax. Hood rich
  • Why do accountants hate pre-tax income? It's g**....

Low Income Jokes

Here is a list of funny low income jokes and even better low income puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the white collar executive say to the low-income disenfranchised youth? Nothing. Social dichotomy prevents the establishment of dialogue.
  • The White House has become low income housing and it's main tenant is a broke, deadbeat There goes the neighborhood!
  • What do you call an urban area in France with a low average income and high rates of criminality? A baghuetto
  • Why couldn't the poor man donate at the s**... bank? He was too low income
Income joke, Why couldn't the poor man donate at the s**... bank?

Income joke, Why couldn't the poor man donate at the s**... bank?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about income can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of income puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Howlingly Hilarious Income Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy

What funny jokes about income you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean salary jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make income prank.

So the church is losing money...

...and the friars decide that they need a new income source. To do this, they set up a flower stand, and do a pretty good business selling flowers in the small village. Unfortunately, there is another floral store that is losing business because of the friars. So, they go talk to the friars, telling them to stop selling flowers, because they are losing money. The friars say "no way man, free country, free enterprise."
The owners of the other floral shop decide to get real about these religious flower sellers, so they hire a hitman to go take them out. The hitman, named Hugh, shows up to the friars' store. Hugh, now, he's about 7'1', and 240 pounds of pure muscle. "Hey," he says, "you guys ought to stop sellin flowers." The petrified friars agree that maybe the floral business isn't such a good idea after all, and promptly shut it down.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.

Ad in the local paper:

25 year old woman, very attractive, beautiful blonde hair, perfect measurements, intelligent, with good sense of humor and stable income - Selling dump truck.

What's the difference between a r**... and a p**...?

To a r**..., a hoedown is a dance. To a p**... it's lost income.

I was researching converting to Mormonism until I found out you have to give them 10% of your income

I guess I'm Jewish.

I just took a part time job at a vitamin store...

for some supplemental income.

If everyone contributes a small amount of their income...

Together we can pool the resources to defeat socialism.

Europe is in turmoil, but at least I've got some steady income despite the migrant crisis

I own a florist around the corner from the French embassy

What do you pay a h**... with?

Income.

Afterlife for IRS Cheaters

Tony and his friend John die in a car accident and go to judgment. God tells Tony that because he cheated on his income taxes, the only way he can enter Heaven is to sleep with a s**..., ugly woman for the next five years.
A few days later, as Tony's walking in the park with his s**..., hideous new girlfriend, he spots his friend John with an absolutely drop dead gorgeous woman. "John, what happened?" Tony asks.
"I have no idea," John replies. "I was told I have five years of amazing s**... to look forward to. The only thing I don't understand is why she always yells 'Damn income taxes!' whenever we have s**...."

I'm playing Monopoly with Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton...

Trump grabbed Community Chest as fast as he could, is building hotels on properties he doesn't really own and is refusing to pay income tax
Clinton started out with a house on Illinois Ave, somehow always has a "Get out of jail free" card and keeps saying she respects any opponent holding Vermont Ave
However, in the end, I have a feeling neither will be satisfied until they get a house on Pennsylvania Ave

HOW TO LIVE?

"Darling," said the young man to his new bride.
"Now that we are married, do you think you will be
able to live on my modest income?"
"Of course, dearest, no trouble," she answered. "But
what will you live on?"

My only form of income is donating blood

It's s**... the life out of me

How To Trigger A Feminist

Feminist: women get paid less than men for the same job
Me: `*shows pornstar income for men and women*`
Feminist: `*Triggered*`

Why was the chef was devestated to find a recipe torn out of his cookbook?

...it was his main sauce of income.

Why did the farmer have to supplement his income by DJing at night?

because his Beets were sick

What's the difference between an income that happen ordinarily and accidentally?

One have to be recognized only once as a revenue, the other you have to record again.

After looking over the BBC wage list on thing has become clear...

Women knowing nothing about cars or football is really hurting their income

Who makes more money? A lawn mower or a fisherman?

The lawnmower... he gets grass income while the fisherman gets net income

Protests on TV are demanding diversity, same s**... relationships, gender free norms, free healthcare, cultural enrichment, free education, drugs, income equality - I found the perfect place that has all this for them.

Prison.

Even though I've had a steady income and have been paying all my bills on time for a while, Visa still doesn't trust me enough to increase my limit.

They don't give me enough credit.

Profit & Loss Statement

Wife asks:
"Why is it that in all marriages the bride sits on the left side and the groom sits on the right?"
Husband's reply:
"Have you ever seen a Profit & Loss Statement? It follows the same logic. All income is posted on the Right and expenses are on the Left!"...

Cat overlords have taken over the world and installed a new economy...

...problem will be how to calculate the purr capita income.

It's interesting how different parts of the country have different ways of saying the same thing.

For instance, in most parts of the country, having an income of $100k or more is called "making six figures".
However, here in San Francisco, we call that same thing "living above the poverty line".

How do h**... get paid?

Income.

When a fisherman fishes out money, he does not have to report it to the government

because that's net income.

To me, woman's pants are a lot like an exclusive country club.

I'm not getting into either, unless I lie about my income or sneak in the b**....

A man wrote the IRS saying . . .

. . . "I have been unable to sleep knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I have understated my income and have enclosed a check for $1500. If I still can't sleep I will send the rest".

Old lady decides to be a p**... to complement her income

Arriving home, she counts the profit with her husband:
- Its U$100,50.
- Honey, who gave you 50 cents?
- What do you mean "who gave me 50 cents"?! Everyone!

I like my coffee like Hamilton liked the source of his income.

Black, and made by my wife.

School days...

Teacher: If income tax is 20% and your dad earns $50,000, how much tax does he pay?
Kid: $100
Teacher: Let's try again. If income tax is 30% and your dad earns $100000, how much does he pay?
Kid: $100
Teacher: Alright, last try. If income tax is %50 and your dad earns $1000000, how much does he pay?
Kid: $100
Teacher: you don't know your percentages.
Kid: you don't know my dad.

A man writes a letter to the IRS . . .

. . . saying "I am unable to sleep because of the guilt I feel for cheating on my taxes. I have underreported my income and am enclosing a check for $1500. If I still can't sleep I will send the rest".

I asked the executioner if he got paid by the job or by the hour...

He said it was a per decapita income.

According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income tax form contains only four lines:

1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.

A Taxing Situation

According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form contains only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.
*As published in "Reader's Digest" 78 years ago.*

Income joke, A Taxing Situation

jokes about income

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these income jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.