Inches Long Jokes
125 inches long jokes and hilarious inches long puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about inches long that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Inches Long Short Jokes
Short inches long jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The inches long humour may include short inches tall jokes also.
- What did kate middleton find out on her wedding night? That not all rulers are twelve inches long
- What's four inches long, two inches wide, and drives women crazy? An empty toilet paper roll.
- In New York City, a fisherman reeled in a 250 pound catfish 6 feet 6 inches long. I don't get what the big deal is. I do that on Tinder every day.
- Why are women so bad at backing up their vehicles? Because we're constantly lied to about how long 6 inches is.
- What's six inches long, two inches wide, and women love to get it? A hundred dollar bill.
- How is a man like a snowstorm? You never know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it will last.
- My dad told me that the future was in my hands Didn't know that the future was 9 inches long
- What's 9 inches long,pink, and makes my girlfriend scream when I put it in her mouth Her miscarriage
- My friend gave me a new "magic" golf ball. As long as you put to within 3 inches of the pin, the ball will always find its way to the hole.
He did not recommend I keep it in my back pocket. - What is six inches long, has a bald head, and drives blondes crazy? A hundred dollar bill.
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Inches Long One Liners
Which inches long one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with inches long? I can suggest the ones about inches and long length.
- What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives your girlfriend wild? A $100 bill.
- Why can't your nose be 12 inches long? Then it'll be a foot.
I'm so sorry. - Why can't a nose be twelve inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
- Whats 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy? A $100 dollar bill.
- Why can't your hand be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot..
- Why can't your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it'd be a foot.
~*Badum tss*~ - What's 18 inches long and never gets used? Leonardo DiCaprio's acceptance speech.
- Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Cause then it would be a foot silly
- When is a hand a foot? When it is 12 inches long
- Why can't your nose be more than 12 inches long? Because it would be a foot.
- What is 6 inches long and every man wishes he had more of it? Dollar bills
- What is 4 inches long and expands when there's a women in a running shower? A sponge
- Hand joke Why can your hand never be 12 inches long?
- Why do legs have to be at least 25 inches long? They're over two feet
- What's 3 inches long and pleases all women? A credit card.
Hilarious Fun Inches Long Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What funny jokes about inches long you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean long and hard jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make inches long pranks.
Q: Why is a swordfish's nose 11 inches long?
A: Because if it were 12 inches long, it would be a foot!
''Doctor, my nose is 11 inches long!"
''Come back when it grows into a foot!"
Q: Why is a swordfish's nose 11 inches long?
A: Because if it were 12 inches long, it would be a foot!
What's six inches long and has nuts?
Almond Joy
s**... is like snow: you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last.
Q: Why is a swordfish's nose 11 inches long?
A: Because if it were 12 inches long, it would be a foot!
What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end.
A toothbrush with toothpaste
Whats six inches long, has a head on it and drives women wild ?
A fifty pound note !
What's six inches long that women love? Folding money.
What am I?
I am a common object enjoyed by both sexes, normally about 8 inches long, with little hairs on one end, and a hole in the other. For most of the day I am laying down, but I am ready for instant action. When in use, I move back and forth and in and out of a warm, moist hole. When the work is finally done, a white, slushy, sticky mush is left behind and I return to my original position. Cleaning is normally done after I have finished. What am I? Why, I am your very own toothbrush!
Things not to say in Subway
1. I would like a 6-inch Hearty Italian.
2. 6-inch doesn't fill me up.
3. Yes, give me more meat.
4. squirt more of that mayo.
5. I can't take a foot-long.
Disappointment
a woman, after a long search on the internet, found out that "PHILLIPS 14 INCH" was actually a T.V
Why do women make such horrible capenters?
Because for years men have telling them that |----------------| is 8 inches long.
What's black, 10-inches long, rock-hard and filled with s**...?
The sock under my bed.
Why Are Firetrucks Red?
Firetrucks have 4 wheels and carry 8 men.
4 + 8 = 12
There are 12 inches in a ruler.
Queen Elizabeth was a ruler.
There was once a ship named Elizabeth that sailed the seas.
Fish live in the seas.
Fish have fins.
People from Finland are called Fins.
Finland and Russia had a war a long time ago.
Russia has red on its flag.
And that's why they're red.
Cause they're always *russian* around.
You know it's cold outside when...
You buy a foot long at Subway and by the time you get it to you car it's a six inch
How long is your hair?
I'm not sure, I've never measured it.
But off the top of my head, I'd say four inches.
A Sexist Joke: Why are women bad at parking?
Because they've been lied to all their lives about how long "8" inches *really* is.
What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when i feed it to her?
her miscarriage
im so sorry
Better Boyfriend （18+Dirty jokes）
Two girls were comparing boyfriends.
"Mine's the best," said the first. "I call him Seven-Up because he's 7 inches long and he's always up!"
"Oh yeah," exclaimed the other, "I call my boyfriend Jack Daniel's because he's the best hard l**... there is!"
What's 6 inches long hard, bent, and in my pants?
My iPhone 6
Why can't your wiener be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot!
What's 10 inches long and white?
Absolutely nothing.
What's 7 inches long and hasn't been s**... in over 2 years?
Whitney Houston's crack pipe.
Just before my girlfriend and I had s**... for the first time...
I told her I was gonna give her 9 inches. Just as long as she was willing to take 3 inch payments
Life Before The Computer
Memory was something you lost with age
An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
A keyboard was a piano
A web was a spider's home
A virus was the flu
A CD was a bank account
A hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And if you had a 3 inch floppy ..
... you just hoped nobody ever found out!!
What is 6" Inch Long
What's 12 inches long and stiff in the morning?
Cot death.
What's six inches long, goes back and forth in your mouth, and has white stuff at the very end?
Your toothbrush, of course!
Why was Ygritte happy she didn't marry Jon snow?
Because she didn't want six inches of snow all year long.
What's 3 inches long and hasn't been s**... in nearly 3 years?
Amy Winehouse's crack pipe.
Canadian joke
What's red, 6 inches long, has a head, but can also be brown, blue, or green? [Answer](/s "Money")
What's six inches long and isn't getting s**... this Friday night?
Whitney Houston's crack pipe.
Why did ygritte break up with Jon Snow?
She didn't want six inches of snow all year long.
A giraffes' tongue is 18 inches long. Good thing it's not 12 inches long. Otherwise, it would be a foot.
What's twelve inches long and white?
Nothing.
Jared from Subway can now try what he supported.
He can now get a 6 inch, or a foot long in prison.
Jared may not get free subway for life anymore...
But he will have no shortage of 6 inch or foot longs.
What is six inches long has a bald head and drives every woman crazy?
100$ bill
What's 18 inches long and hangs in front of an a**...
[insert name of political opponent here]'s tie
What's 14 inches long and makes women scream at night?
Crib death.
At least Jared Fogle will be able to keep up with his weight loss in jail...
He'll be force-fed six inches to foot longs for the next 15 years.
A priest and a rabbi buy a car...
A priest and a rabbi buy a car. The priest walks out and sees the rabbi sprinkling water over the hood.
"What are you doing?" Asked the priest.
"I'm blessing the car," said the rabbi.
"Oh, as long as we're doing THAT..." The priest walked into the garage. He later came back out with a hacksaw and cut 2 inches off of the tailpipe.
Why is s**... like snow?
Because you never know how many inches you'll get or how long it will last..
What is 18 inches long, Stiff, and makes a woman scream at night?...
Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
Men are like snowstorms
You don't know how many inches you'll get, how long it will last and how hard it will be.
What's six inches long, has two nuts, and gives women big bellies?
I'm hung like a baby boy.
About 20 inches long, 14 inches around, weighs about 9 pounds.
What's 18 inches long, and makes a woman scream the entire night?
Her dead baby.
Do you know why the Statue of Liberty's nose is 11 inches long?
Because one more and it would be a foot!
What is nine inches long and keeps a woman up screaming all night?
Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
What is 13 inches long, has a purple head and makes a woman scream all night long?
Crib death.
Why is my hand 11 inches long?
Because if it were any longer it would be a foot!
What is 18 inches long, pink, squishy, and makes women cry?
SIDS
What's 9 inches long, purple, and I love to shove it down my girlfriend's t**...?
Her miscarriage.
What's six inches long starts with a p?
A p**....
My girlfriend has a f**......
...which is a shame for me, because my c**...'s only eleven and a half inches long.
Why is a honeymoon like a snow storm?
You don't know how many inches you're gonna get and how long it's gonna last.
What's 6 inches long, hard, begins with P and has a red nub?
A pencil, you pervert.
What is inside your pants that is 6 inches long?
A dollar bill.
No such thing as a free yatch [Long]
A salesman talked my uncle into buying 10,000 personalized pens for his business with the promise that
he would be eligible to win a 32-foot yacht. A born gambler, my uncle agreed.
Well, he won, and a few weeks after the pens arrived, his prize showed up: a 12-inch plastic yacht with
32 plastic feet glued to the bottom.
10-inch BIC
Two guys are out fishing on a boat when one of them wants to have a smoke.
1: You got a lighter?
2: Yes. *pulls out a 10 inch long BIC lighter*
1: Woah, where'd you get that!?
2: I have a personal genie.
1: Cool! Can I make a wish?
2: Sure, just be very clear, he's a bit hard of hearing. *Summons genie*
1: I wish for a million bucks!
*The genie snaps his fingers and a million ducks fly overhead.*
1: Wow, your genie really s**... at hearing.
2: I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC?
What's brown, three inches long, and sits on a piano bench?
Beethoven's first movement.
What's black and ten inches long?
My lungs.
What's 10 inches long and makes women laugh?
My bank statement.
Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
...Because then it would be a foot!
(Yes, I stole this joke from a kid who told it to me)
What is 5 inches long , goes in and out your mouth but only the top goes in ??
A toothbrush you freak !!