Inauguration Jokes
34 inauguration jokes and hilarious inauguration puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about inauguration that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
If you haven't heard the jokes about Joe Biden's enormous Inauguration Bible, Harris or Lady Gaga, come to us. You can read also jokes about presidents Barack Obama, Donald Trump and Bill Clinton's ceremonies.
Funniest Inauguration Short Jokes
Short inauguration jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The inauguration humour may include short presidency jokes also.
- Everyone is talking about how the inaugural attendance was 1/40 of what it was in 2009... They don't understand how killer the commute from Moscow is.
- The CDC warns tomorrow could be one of the worst days ever for Covid. Because after the inauguration people everywhere will simultaneously exhale.
- Trump actually attended Biden's inauguration He was the crying baby you heard right before Biden took his oath
- What's the difference between a Clinton inauguration and a Wu-Tang reunion? There's a chance of another Wu-Tang Reunion happening.
- It's official Trump's inauguration date is now a National Holiday. At least I assume so because the government shutdown for it.
- Are you disappointed you didn't have a white Christmas? Don't worry. I heard Inauguration Day will be plenty white.
- The date is 20 January 2017. The date is 20 January 2017. Donald Trump has just been sworn in as President. He walks to the mic for his inauguration speech. He looks at Obama and says "You're Fired"
- Why was William Henry Harrison's inaugural address so memorable? He had a killer final draft.
- Donald Trump had a record amount of religious leaders participate in his inaugural ceremony including: a priest, a deacon, and.... one hundred million people saying "god help us"
- Police are pepper spraying protesters at the Inauguration today. I don't know if that is to hurt them, or just give them all Orange Face?
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Inauguration One Liners
Which inauguration one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with inauguration? I can suggest the ones about ceremony and celebration.
- Well, it's Inauguration Day in America.... It's gonna be a great mourning.
- I wanted to watch the inauguration today But Eisenhower late.
- Barack Obama 1,000,000 people showed up to his inauguration, only 14 missed work.
- The most surprising moment in the inauguration Jimmy Carter is still alive
- What shirt did Jeff Sessions wear to the inauguration? White T.
Uplifting Inauguration Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about inauguration you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean president day jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make inauguration pranks.
The Inauguration of the First Jewish President.
The first Jewish President has just been elected, and is being sworn in. One man in the audience is watching him take the oath, when he realizes he is sitting next to the President's mother.
She turns to him and says,
"You see that man up there, the one with his hand on the book repeating the sentences?"
"Yeah?" He responds
"His brother's a doctor"
The first Jewish President of the United States is elected.
The night before the inauguration he calls his mother.
"Mom, I'd love for you to come visit and stay with me during the inauguration and for a few days."
"Oh I don't know, airfare is so expensive these days."
"Mom, I'll fly you out on Air Force One!"
"Oh, but you know, cab fare is ridiculous."
"Mom, the Presidential motorcade will drive you here."
"But accommodations, especially during the inau---"
"MOM!! I'll put you in the Lincoln bedroom itself!!"
She reluctantly agrees, hangs up and starts talking to her friend.
"Who was that?"
"My son."
*gasp* "The doctor??"
"No, the other one."
When Obama made his inaugural speech, they put him behind bulletproof glass.
And that's proof of the racism that still exists in America today. I mean, just because he's black, doesn't mean he was going to go and shoot everybody.
Inauguration Limerick by Stephen Colbert
There once was a man named Barack
Whose re-election came as a shock
He raised taxes I pay
And turned marriage gay
And now he's coming after your Glock
I'm going to the inaugural meeting of the Dodgem Car Appreciation Society later.
They're expecting a bumper crowd.
I just came up with Trump's inauguration drink
I call it, "Make America Smashed Again"
It's a White Russian with pumpkin spice.
Sean Spicer said the inauguration had the "largest audience ever."
Then he took it back because your mother left.
Well if there's one thing we can all agree on regarding tomorrow's inauguration ...
Orange is the new Black
It just occurred to me Trump's inauguration was cloudy.
I guess the sun was another big star that refused to show.
As soon as the inauguration is over, I'm getting a position on Trump's ethics committee.
I'm not political, I just need some quite time alone.
I really hope Donald Trump wins this election
Best way to prevent COVID-19 spreading at the inauguration
Business has been booming in the north since Trump's inauguration. . .
They're all stopping in on their way to Canada
The inauguration ceremony should be like the olympics.
They can play the US national anthem, then the Russian one.
Guys, I know we're 3 days from Inauguration Day...
But here's how Bernie Sanders can still win!
I can't wait until Trump's inauguration
when ashton kutcher finally pops out and tells us we've been punk'd
