Improper Jokes
35 improper jokes and hilarious improper puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about improper that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you find yourself getting a little too creative with your sense of humor? Improper jokes may be hilarious in the moment, but can contain language and content that is excessively unfit for certain audiences. This article examines the types of situations where an infinitely improper joke should not be used.
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Funniest Improper Short Jokes
Short improper jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The improper humour may include short inappropriate jokes also.
- I dated an English teacher for a few months, but it didn't work out. She didn't approve of my improper use of the colon.
- I failed medical school for the same reason I failed English class Improper: Colon placement
- For those who struggle with fractions: 6/5=Improper fraction,
5/5=Whole number,
4/5=Proper fraction,
3/5=Racist. - I now weigh a fraction of what I did in high school. An improper fraction, but still, a fraction.
- Homonym Study When it comes to an improperly placed hominem, is it the right word spelled wrong or the wrong word spelled right?
- Dogged I used to go out with an English Teacher but we eventually broke up because she disliked my improper use of the colon.
- A driver gets pulled over for improper use of a carpool lane.. Cop: "Carpool lane is 2 or more passengers and I don't see your second passenger."
Driver: "well I'm just beside myself." - I'm starting a new diet where I improperly use my jaw muscles to eat whatever I want It's called CrossFat
- I was thrown out of the hospital for improper conduct with children Apparently dressing up like the grim reaper and pointing at anti-vaxxer's kids isn't okay.
- I need a fraction of your time for this I asked my mathematics teacher to give me 11 eighths but she said that would be improper...
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Improper One Liners
Which improper one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with improper? I can suggest the ones about making inappropriate and incorrect.
- what does a basic white girl and an improper fraction have in common? They can't even
- When's the improper fraction helpline open? 24/7
- It's ironic... How most people use the word "ironic" improperly.
- I hate it when people use the word "subdermal" improperly... Really gets under my skin.
- Teachers be like... That is improper grammar!
- I try making jokes about fractions... But end up doing it the improper way 5/4 times.
- Why'd the Literature Student Break Up With Her Boyfriend? Improper use of the colon.
- Fractions are like s**...... It's improper when the bigger one's on top.
- Why can't an 8 get on top of a 7 during s**...? Because that would be improper.
Hilarious Improper Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What funny jokes about improper you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean unprofessional jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make improper pranks.
Chuck Norris's password is the last 9 digits of pi.
Chuck Norris can divide by 0.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice
Chuck Norris can cross a vector with a scalar
Chuck Norris is so tough he can draw a circle with exactly 100 degrees.
Chuck Norris is so badass he can find value of a variable in an expansion without factoring the coefficient within the expansion.
Chuck Norris is so tough he can draw an isosceles triangle with four perfectly identical vertices
Chuck Norris is so tough he can simplify an improper fraction without first dividing the denominator and using it to multiple the numerator.
Sunday in church after St. Patrick's Day
It was a sunday after St. Patrick's day in the church of a small village in the west of Ireland. Obviously all the people were more or less hungover, which infuriated the pastor of the village.
"It's a disgrace how we celebrate our most important saint by indulging in binge drinking and other improper activities. If I could have all the wine in the world, I would throw it in the river!"
There was a wave of murmur among the churchgoers.
"If I could have all the beer in the world, I would throw it in the river as well!"
The people put their heads down in guilt, thinking about what they had done.
"If I could have all the SPIRITS in the world, I would throw them in the river with the beer and the wine!"
Now the church was completely silent.
After a short while, the musical conductor of the church spoke up, "Now let us sing hymn number 369, *'Shall We Gather at the River?'*"
---
I heard this story from the ambassador of Ireland in Finland.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife is an English teacher
She always corrects my grammar while having s**.... I'll go "s**... it good" and she'll reply "it's s**... it well!". I'll say "Who's your daddy" and she'll correct "who's your dad".
She gets particularly annoyed about my improper use of colon.
A wife says to her husband, "Have a gained to much weight since we met?"
The husband honestly answers, "Oh, maybe just a fraction more than I'd like." The wife asks, "I thought so too. How *much* of a fraction?" The husband again answers honestly, "I'd rather not say. It would be improper."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My mother has the biggest b**... in the world
My mom always get r**... mad whenever I mention that she has the world biggest b**.... She tells me that is improper to be introducing my two brothers to strangers like that and I should instead introduce them by their proper names.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Women are like numbers ...
* Some are Rational, but infinitely more are Irrational.
* The Real ones might be Proper or Improper, but only the Imaginary ones are ever Pure.
* Some are Natural, the rest are Negative, or just not there.
* Some are Prime, but those are hard to find.
* Every other one is just plain Odd.
Two guys were chatting in the bar
"So how's it go with that chick last night? She was an English teacher , right?"
"Yeah, she got dressed and left a few minutes after we got in bed"
"Shame. Why'd she do so?"
"I guess she didn't like my improper use of the colon."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
what gets longer when pulled, fits between brests, slides neatly into a hole, has choked people when used improperly, and works best when j**...?
A seatbelt.
I was buying a map of an expensive brand.
When I was looking at the Middle East, I noticed that the countries were improperly named. I thought, maybe its a cheap copy of the brand and not actually from that brand?
So I went up to the shopkeeper, pointed at the improperly named countries in the middle east, and said "Is this fake?"
The shopkeeper replied by saying "No, no, Israel."
A man was consulting his psychiatrist.
Among other questions, the doctor asked.
"Are you troubled by improper thoughts?"
"Why no!" answered the patient.
"To tell the truth doctor, I rather enjoy them!"
