Impairment Jokes
45 impairment jokes and hilarious impairment puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about impairment that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Impairment Short Jokes
Short impairment jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The impairment humour may include short jokes also.
- What does Yoda say when he is drunk? Dear me it appears I have imbibed alcohol in sufficient quantitiy to impair my speech
- A man who passes away leaves $125 million to help the visually impaired. They never found it.
- The bad news is, one of the earliest signs of cognitive impairment is the inability to finish sentences. The good news Is
- Whenever somebody calls me ugly, I get super sad and want to hug them. I know life is tough for the visually impaired.
- I have an amazing gardener who's both vision impaired and dyslexic. His work is Mind BLowing
- The weather forecaster this morning said that vision might be impaired by fog. I agree with him, but that's a weird way to spell "Whiskey".
- I've been trying for years to divorce my hearing-impaired wife but she is so mad She refuses to sign anything
- I gave a speech at a school for those with hearing impairments Too bad it fell on deaf ears
- I'm visually impaired and the other day I decided to go to the shop I walked into the shop
and then I went inside. - My hearing impaired son has finally come up with a name for his own thrash metal band. Megadeaf.
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Impairment One Liners
Which impairment one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with impairment? I can suggest the ones about and .
- Did you know there was a cult for visually impaired? They follow their leader blindly
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fishually impaired.
- What's the #1 university for the hearing impaired? Yale.
- At the school for the hearing impaired... ...no one can hear you scream!
- Why does the speech impaired baker say he got fired? He took one too many whisks.
- No musician has vision impairments All of them should know how to C#
- League of Legends: I know how Cassiopeia feels... My asthma impairs movement as well. :/
- What do you call an Italian with a broken arm? Speech impaired.
- My hearing-impaired GF left me for a hearing-impaired man. I should have seen the signs.
- Why are hearing impaired people so o**...? Come again?
- What do you call a mentally impaired French Man that cant say no? A Oui-t**...
- What do you call an Italian in handcuffs? Speech Impaired
Impairment Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about impairment you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make impairment pranks.
Hidden Bible code
"Sister Agnes?"
"Yes, Martha; what is it?"
"Today's reading, from Malachi. I don't understand it."
The old nun approached the bench where Martha sat between two other visually-impaired students, and wedged herself in between the three. She looked down at the weighty braille Bible Martha was reading. "What don't you understand, my dear?"
"Well," continued Martha. "It seems to be a story all about the birth of Satan, the one that was prophesied about."
Alarmed, the elderly sister snatched the Bible from Martha and ran her leathery fingers over the little dots. Then she burst out laughing, "Oh, you silly child. You are holding the book upside down."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I did a m**... exhibition for a group of hearing impaired people yesterday......
........when I climaxed, they all just looked at me & said "come again?"
A doctor, a philanthropist, and an engineer are playing a round of golf behind a group of blind golfers.
As they wait for the impaired golfers to painstakingly finish the next hole, the doctor says "What a motivating sight. I'm inspired to start a clinic for visually impaired people in order that they might better pursue their dreams."
The philanthropist nods in agreement and says "That's a worthy cause. I will donate a large sum of money toward this clinic of yours."
The engineer says "Couldn't these guys play at night?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Impaired s**...
I heard having s**... with a mentally impaired person has its ups.......
.....and Downs
My ex-girlfriend used to date a guy with a memory impairment...
My ex-girlfriend used to date a guy with a memory impairment
Two patients are sitting in a waiting room.
One of the patients, who has a speech impairment, asks the other patient,
"H-h-hi t-there. W-w-what are y-you here f-f-for?"
The other replies, "I have an issue with my prostate."
"W-w-what's the p-problem?"
The other answers, "Well, the way you talk is the way I pee."
What's it called when a woman's birth control impairs her driving and leads to her arrest?
An IUDUI.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know that m**... can impair your short-term memory?
And, did you know that m**... can impair your short-term memory?
If you're ever unsure, ask a visually impaired person with Tourette Syndrome for advice.
They will swear blind by it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Today's meeting for visually impaired psychics
has been cancelled...
due to unforeseen circumstances.
We assure you this issue will be **raised** in our next newsletter.
I used to sell drugs to kids at the school for the visually impaired until I was caught...
Luckily they turned a blind eye.