Im Not Drunk Jokes
9 im not drunk jokes and hilarious im not drunk puns to laugh out loud. Read bar jokes about im not drunk that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Fun-Filled Im Not Drunk Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What is a good im not drunk joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Two beers sitting in a bar
Full beer turns to the empty one and says, "come on, let's go home. You drivin'?"
"can't" the empty one replies, "Im drunk"
Ooh! Ooh! I have a current events joke!
Go easy on me im drunk.
When I heard that the A/C had gone out at the AT&T Center in San Antonio tonight for the NBA finals, I thought to myself... I guess this favors the Heat.
A drunk man runs into a Priest
A drunk man stumbles out a bar and walks straight into a Preist. The man sees his chance and says "Look Father! I'm Jesus Christ!"
The Preist tells him he isn't but the man is adament to show the Priest, so he takes the Preist im and walks upvto the bar.
The bartender says "Jesus Christ, what do you want now?"
Will get downvoted like mad but Im drunk so I dont care (higly racist)
Why do beyonce sing "to the left to the left"???
Cause black people have no rights...
Im sorry
a drunk joke
a drunk man was pulled over by a cop on the high way
cop:where are you going at this time
drunk man: im going to a lecture
cop:from where are you going to get a lecture at this time of the night
drunk man: from my wife
I was talking to my best friend last night.
Me: IM NOT DRUNK! YOUR DRUNK!
Best friend: dude... I'm your reflection.
Me: (cries) I know...
A husband comes home drunk..
His wife shouts: "So, you're drunk again, you castaway!"
The man responds: " Aww, shut your mouth, im punished enough to see you double!"
An interesting title
Officer: are you drunk
Me: I SWEAR to drunk im not God
Two Parents Want to Adopt a Child...
so they head down to adoption agency. They say to the matron,
"We'd like to adopt a child please."
She responds, "Well, we only have one child left. And he's a head."
"What?"
"He has no arms or legs. He's really just a head, poor thing."
But the new parents decide they want him anyway. So they take him home, and he has a great childhood. He does well in school, learns to overcome his disability, and his parents support him.
Eventually, he turns 21 and his dad takes him out for his first drink. They head up the hill to the local bar and take a seat.
The dad says, "Two beers please."
The bartender gives them the drinks and the son enjoys his first beer. Then, p**...! Two arms pop out. Two drunks sitting over at a nearby table yell, "Give 'im another one! Give 'im another one!"
So he has another beer and p**...! Two legs pop out. Everyone celebrates, the son is dancing around and having a good time, when the drunks say, "Give 'im another one!"
The son has another beer and p**...! He disappears!
The two drunks look at each other and say, "He should have quit while he was a head."
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