Illinois Jokes
25 illinois jokes and hilarious illinois puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about illinois that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Illinois Short Jokes
Short illinois jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The illinois humour may include short towns jokes also.
- When I was ten, my family moved to Downers Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them.
- It's so cold in Illinois this morning on my way to work I walked past the capitol and the politicians had their hands in their own pockets.
- The State of Illinois has just unveiled its new welcome sign... Welcome to Illinois; not ALL of our elected officials have been indicted!
- A friend told me that the biggest furry convention was in Chicago, Illinois I had an epiphany and said maybe THAT'S why they're called the Chicago Bears
- So my son wants to be a businessman in the state of Illinois... Too bad Senator Durbin is in office!
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Illinois One Liners
Which illinois one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with illinois? I can suggest the ones about backwoods and southern.
- What's the most popular website in Illinois? Cornhub.com
- I hear people from Illinois get mad when you pronounce the S, It really ill-annoys them
- Why are there so many Latina's in Illinois? Because that's where the Chica go.
- Why don't you want to hang out with a dude from Chicago? Because 'Illinois you!
- Heard about the honest politician from Illinois? Neither have I
- Why is the S in Illinois silent? Because everyone there is ill of noise!
- What is Illinois known for? The three C's. Chicago, Corn, and Corruption.
- My State of the Union I am from Illinois, but I also lived in Arizona for a while.
- Why did the U.S. Navy name their newest submarine the Illinois? They are both underwater.
- I have a cousin from Illinois He's illannoying.
- Why does corn in Illinois lean east? Because Indiana s**... and Iowa blows.
- One from Wisconsin Why does the Mississippi River flow south?
Because Illinois s**....
Delightful Fun Illinois Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about illinois you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean areas jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make illinois pranks.
I'm playing Monopoly with Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton...
Trump grabbed Community Chest as fast as he could, is building hotels on properties he doesn't really own and is refusing to pay income tax
Clinton started out with a house on Illinois Ave, somehow always has a "Get out of jail free" card and keeps saying she respects any opponent holding Vermont Ave
However, in the end, I have a feeling neither will be satisfied until they get a house on Pennsylvania Ave
Topical Jokes for 6/1
A video has surfaced of Justin Bieber saying the n-word. People are calling it the least offensive Justin Bieber video ever.
In Illinois, a 115-pound-woman won a hot dog eating contest, after she ate 28 hot dogs. The judges then congratulated the 138-pound-woman.
The NSA is reportedly collecting millions of images per day to build a f**...-recognition database. The NSA is cataloguing the photos in a massive online database -- it's called Instagram.
