Ice Cube Jokes

101 ice cube jokes and hilarious ice cube puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ice cube that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Ice Cube Short Jokes

Short ice cube jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ice cube humour may include short ice pick jokes also.

  1. My father is cuban and my mother is from Iceland. So i am...... .....
    an Ice Cube
    Cred: Russell Peters
  2. I just melted an ice cube by staring at it. Took a bit longer than I thought it would, though.
  3. earlier today I dropped an ice cube It slipped under the refrigerator and I couldn't reach it. I was really upset about it at first but now I'm over it. water under the fridge.
  4. Parents in 1998: Don't believe everything you read on the internet Parents in 2018: Did you know that dogs will die if you feed them ice cubes?
  5. A man sees a blonde girl staring intently at a ice cube in her hand The man asks the girl why she's staring at the ice cube and she responds, "I'm trying to figure out where it's leaking from."
  6. An ice cube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. Bunsen... My flame...I melt whenever I see you," confessed the ice cube.
    * Chill, it's just a phase you're going through. *
  7. Cool Customers Two drunks are sitting at the bar staring into their drinks. 'hey cobber, you ever seen an ice cube with a hole in it before?'
    'Yes, I've been married to one for 15 years'.
  8. Today I learned that I can make an ice cube melt just by concentrating on it and thinking ''Melt.'' I have to admit that it takes a lot longer than I expected.
  9. I dropped an ice cube next to the freezer. It melted and got my sock wet the next time I went to the kitchen. I was mad at first, but now it's mostly water under the fridge.
  10. I can't decide between Star Trek popsicles or a Star Trek ice cube mold.. both choices have their frozen Khans.

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Ice Cube One Liners

Which ice cube one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ice cube? I can suggest the ones about icicle and iceberg.

  1. I don't understand why Ice Cube hates the police so much... They are a really good band
  2. If Ice Cube and snoop dogg adopted a child... they could call it Slush Puppy :)
  3. If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed
  4. How does Ice-Cube drink his milk? Straight Outta Carton.
  5. If a woman from Cuba marries a man from iceland Are their children called ice cubes?
  6. I Tried Snorting Coke once... ... but the ice cubes got caught in my nose.
  7. What's cool cool cool Ice cubed
  8. Ice Cube is 48 years old, but still hasn't melted. Do you know why? Man's not hot.
  9. What do you call the kid of an Iceland and Cuban parents? Ice cubes.
  10. Why did the ice cube drop out of highschool? It was too cool for school.
  11. Ice cubes are very badass I mean they float around their own blood
  12. I tried sniffing Coke once... But the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
  13. How to make an ice cube melt faster? Talk to it and get into a heated argument
  14. What did an ice cube say to the fire. Tsssssssssssssssssssss
  15. What does problems and ice cubes have in common? Both go well with Alcohol.

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Ice Cube Jokes

What funny jokes about ice cube you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ice cold jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ice cube pranks.

Q: What do you call the child of parents from Iceland and Cuba?
A: An ice cube.

Why are there no ice cubes in Poland? Because they lost the recipe.

Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.

Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.

Chuck Norris is so cool, ice cubes are jealous...

Chuck Norris puts ice cube trays in the cupboard, and he gets ice.

Three vampires walk into a bar...

The bartender asks the first vampire what he wants to drink. He replies, through a thick Transylvanian accent, "Warm blood." The bartender pulls a live rat out from under the bar, cleaves its head off, and drains the blood into a glass.
He asks the second vampire what he wants to drink, and he replies "Cold blood." The bartender pulls out another rat, chops off its head, and throws several ice cubes into the glass with the blood.
The bartender asks the third vampire what he wants to drink, and the vampire says "Water." The bartender is puzzled. "Don't you want blood?" he asks. The vampire says, "Oh, no, I'm making tea," and pulled a used t**... out of his jacket.

Blonde Inventions

The water-proof towel
Glow in the dark sunglasses
Solar powered flashlight
Submarine screen door
A book on how to read
Inflatable dart board
A dictionary index
Powdered water
Pedal powered wheel chair
Water proof tea bags
Zero proof alcohol
Reusable ice cubes
Skinless bananas
Do it yourself roadmap

What's the difference between an ice cube and England?

An ice cube can stay in the cup for longer!

What kind of house does Ice Cube live in?

A Nigloo!

What's the difference between the Enola Gay and Ice Cube?

The Enola Gay only dropped one F-Bomb

I had the best ice cube

It's like it could melt in my mouth

Ice Cube Should Open a Vietnamese Restaurant

called "pho the police!"

What happened to the ice cube?

It came straight outta Compton's glass.

Ice Cube visits Edgar Allen Poe

Wakes him up by rapping at his chamber door.

you know what would be cool ?

" an ice cube ..
you know what would NOT be cool ? molesting children .. cause that would be really hot "
-an ice cream van driver .

What's Curley from *Of Mice and Men's* least favorite rap song?

*No Vaseline* - Ice Cube

When's the best time to rob Ice Cube?

Black Friday After Next

Gordon Ramsay walks into a bar...

... and asks for a glass of water with ice. Once his drink is served, he looks at the bartender and asks: "What did you use to make the ice cubes?"
Bartender: "Water."
Ramsay: "Fresh?"
Bartender: "No, frozen."
Ramsay: "Oh for f**...'s sake."

How did the ice cube react when it came into some hot water?

It had a meltdown

Official Inauguration Drink - The Orange Russian

Make a white Russian, but use gold leaf in the ice cubes and Trump v**....
Claim it's made wrong,
Tell the Bartender " You're Fired"
Refuse to pay.

Ice Cube wrote a book about racist perceptions of other cultures in the western world

West Said!

A man went ice fishing one day and reeled-in a giant ice cube

After months of only catching fish, he finally caught a cold.

An ice cube decided to wear a new hat

A nice man saw this, and said to the ice cube: "Looking solid, dude!"
The ice cube absolutely melted at this sweet compliment.
Now he's looking liquid, dude.

What do Eskimos call Ice Cube?


I asked, "hey Ice Cube, where's my copy of Harry Potter?"

"Check your shelf"

wanted three ice cubes

but two had to suffice

I once tried sniffing coke.

But the ice cubes kept getting stuck up my nose.

Why are ice cubes so smart?

They have 32 degrees.

My missus was furious at me for k**... dropped ice-cubes under the refrigerator.

But now it's just water under the fridge.

What's Ice Cubes least favorite sandwich?

A melt

My uncle always tells me I shouldn't snort coke

He says I'll get ice cubes stuck in my nose.

Ice Cube has sure come a long way from the rap world to family-friendly comedies...

All the way from "Keep it gangster" to "Keep it down in the back seat"

Last night, my wife got mad at me for k**... some ice cubes under the refrigerator...

...but now it's just water under the fridge.

Life saving home remedies: if you ever find yourself choking on an ice cube.......

Quick drink a cup of boiling water

The rapper Ice Cube has gotten diagnosed with stage 1 cancer..

He's terminally chill

Did you hear about the criminal who was convicted and thrown in jail?

He asked for a glass of water and was served only ice cubes.
Just ice was served

What did the ice cube ask to the other ice cube?

Can you do me a solid?

I swallowed an ice cube yesterday, and I still haven't pooped it out...

I'm really concerned!

What do you call a homosexual Ice Cube?

Ice Sphere

r**... at the doctor

r**... at the doctor: Doc, I think I'm in trouble, I swallowed an ice cube 3 days ago and it ain't come out yet.

LPT: If you accidentally drop ice cubes on the floor, quietly kick them under the refrigerator.

It'll soon be water under the fridge.

I went to a fancy dress party in a massive ice cube costume.

There were so many bodies there that I almost had a meltdown.

My girlfriend got mad at me when I dropped some ice cubes and kicked them under the refrigerator.

But now it's just water under the fridge.

What did the eye doctor say to Ice Cube?

O'Shea, can you see?

I went to see Funkmaster Flex perform last night but he was acting odd so Ice Cube stepped in for him.

Weird Flex but O'Shea.

I just realized I have a superpower

I can melt ice cubes just by staring at them.
It takes a while though.

What did the ice cube say to the glass of water?

I'm cooler than you

How can you tell that an ice cube didn't graduate from college in the US?

Because it has 0 degrees.
Also because it uses the Celsius scale.

Did you hear Ice Cube converted to Judeaism?

He changed his name to Ice Berg.

Did you ever hear the one about the ice cube's great escape from the freezer?

You could say it was a very well thawed out plan

Skull shaped ice cubes are pretty cool

Well, for a few minutes at least.

Life Pro Tip: If you accidentally drop ice cubes on the kitchen floor, quietly kick it under the refrigerator.

Soon it'll be water under the fridge.

A guy from iceland and a girl from cuba get married.What are their children called?

Ice cubes

Someone told me I could make ice cubes out of leftover wine

I'm confused... What is leftover wine??

Did you know that choking on a single cube of water is i**... in some places?

It's referred to as an obstruction of just ice.


A couple icebergs in Antarctica are best friends. They grew up together and have known each other since they were ice cubes.
One iceberg decides he's tired of all the cold weather, he tells his best friend he's going on a warm vacation for a couple weeks. A couple weeks pass by and he returns to Antarctica. His best friend immediately takes notice of the amount of weight his friend lost while on vacation.
He says "you look amazing my friend, you really slimmed down! Was vacation everything you thawed it would be?"

I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee.

I asked the clerk to put some ice cubes into the cup so that I could drink the cool coffee quickly.
At the window, there was a delay.
Finally, a teen-aged girl came to the window looking frustrated.
"I'm having a problem," she announced. "The ice keeps melting."

My mother woke me up with the sentence „Hey, we're getting new phones!

I was happy, but not sure why I woke up in a bathtub full of ice cubes.

Oftentimes i find myself putting ice cubes on my eyeballs.

I think its because i wanna look cool.

jokes about ice cube