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Ice Cream Van Jokes

23 ice cream van jokes and hilarious ice cream van puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ice cream van that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Ice Cream Van Short Jokes

Short ice cream van jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ice cream van humour may include short vanilla ice cream jokes also.

  1. I bought a CD of ice cream van music. Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces..
  2. Ice cream van man found dead on the floor of his ice cream van, covered in sprinkles and raspberry sauce Police are not treating the death as suspicious.
    They believe he topped himself.
  3. Did you hear about the ice-cream vendor found dead in his van covered in strawberry sauce and chocolate sprinkles? Police say he topped himself.
  4. In Scotland, they are so mean with money that every home has double glazing installed. So their kids can't hear the ice cream van
  5. Whenever I asked for an ice cream from the van, my Mum would tell me that when they played music it meant that they'd run out This isn't a joke, I'm 30 yrs old now finding out otherwise.
  6. Man found dead... in an ice cream van covered in sprinkles.
    Police think he topped himself.
  7. The ice cream man was found dead inside his van. Covered in Hundreds & Thousands, Sprinkles, Chocolate drops and a Flake. Police believe he may of topped himself.
  8. I worked in one of those creepy ice cream vans over memorial day weekend, and I must say, they really do work. I raked in the Benjamins. Also got a couple Jacobs and Timothys as well.
  9. Ice cream van drivers are very territorial. I came across a couple arguing once, one threatened the other with a hammer. Soon backed off when the other guy pulled out a Magnum!
  10. you know what would be cool ? " an ice cube ..
    you know what would NOT be cool ? molesting children .. cause that would be really hot "
    -an ice cream van driver .

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Ice Cream Van One Liners

Which ice cream van one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ice cream van? I can suggest the ones about ice cream and ice cream cone.

  1. Unsettling sounds #23 Ice-cream van after dark
  2. What does the ice-cream van man do to save his parking spot? Puts cones out.
  3. What's a black mans' least favourite ice cream van? Mr Whippy.

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Ice Cream Van Jokes

What funny jokes about ice cream van you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ice cream cones jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ice cream van pranks.

A lady walks into an ice cream shop.

"Can I get a chocolate scoop on a cone?" she asks.
"Sorry, ma'am, but we're out of chocolate ice cream," says the man behind the counter.
"Oh, well then can I get a chocolate sundae?" she asks.
"We're out of chocolate," he repeats.
"Well, how about a chocolate milkshake?"
The man is frustrated at this point and decides to teach her a lesson.
"Ma'am, do you see the 'van' in vanilla?"
"Yes," she says.
"Do you also see the 'straw' in strawberry?"
"I do."
"Ma'am, do you see the 'frick' in chocolate?"
"There's no 'frick' in chocolate..."
"THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!"

Two men with Alzheimer's are sat in a park...

... when they hear an ice-cream van pull up nearby. Bob turns to Bill and asks 'do you want an ice-cream Bill?'
Bob says 'yes please, but don't forget the chocolate sauce.'
Bob says 'I won't forget, don't worry. Anything else?'
Bill says 'in that case, I'll have some chopped nuts on it too. Don't forget now.'
Bob says 'I won't, don't worry. Chocolate sauce and chopped nuts, coming right up' and
Bob wanders off in the direction of the ice-cream van.
After 40 minutes, Bob finally turns up with two hot-dogs. Bill says 'you fool Bob! I knew you'd forget! I wanted mustard on mine!'

My next door neighbour is a ice cream man, he went missing and we eventually found him in the back of his van covered in sprinkles, caramel, crushed oreos and chocolate flakes

Apparently he topped himself!

A man went to the ice cream shop and ordered a chocolate cone...

I'm sorry, Sir, we're out of chocolate.
Oh, that's too bad. I'll have a chocolate cone with sprinkles then.
I'm sorry, Sir, but like I told you, we're out of chocolate.
How about a chocolate/vanilla twist, then?
Let me ask you something. How do you spell the 'van' in 'vanilla'?
V-a-n.
OK! We're on the same page! And how do you spell the 'straw' in 'strawberry'?
S-t-r-a-w.
Right, and lastly, how do you spell the f**...' in 'chocolate'?
There is no f**...' in 'chocolate'.
THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!

Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands...

Police say that he topped himself.

The little boy just wants chocolate ice cream...

A little boy walks into an ice cream shop...
"I want chocolate ice cream!" the boy exclaimed.
"I'm sorry we don't have chocolate", the clerk sighs "but I have this delicious strawberry and vanilla!"
"No! I want chocolate!" the boy cried.
"Tell you what" ,the clerk adds "can you spell 'VAN' as in vanilla?"
"Yeah! V-A-N", the boy proudly says.
"What about 'STRAW' as in strawberry?"
"Yeah! S-T-R-A-W", the boys says as he is getting annoyed.
"Now, what about f**...' is an chocolate???"
The boys screams, "There is no f**...' in chocolate!!"
"That's what I'm trying to tell you, boy!!!!!"

A penguin takes his car to a mechanic because there is a funny noise coming from under the hood.

Leave it with me, says the mechanic. Come back in 20 minutes.
So, off goes the penguin. It's a pretty hot day and he's a cool weather kind of guy so on spotting an
ice cream van he goes and buys himself a 99. Now, penguins aren't very good at eating ice creams—
the lack of opposable thumbs makes it tricky. So by the time the penguin has finished his 99, he is
completely covered in ice cream. It is all over his beak and all over his flippers. Feeling a little
sticky, he goes back to the garage.
Oh, hello, says the mechanic, wiping his hands on a cloth.
Hello, replies the penguin. Was it anything serious?
Not really, but it looks like you've blown a seal.
Oh no, no, no! says the penguin, wiping his mouth. It's just ice cream.