The Best 17 I Wasn T That Drunk Jokes

Following is our collection of funny I Wasn T That Drunk jokes. There are some i wasn t that drunk forsythe jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these i wasn t that drunk drunken puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest I Wasn T That Drunk Jokes and Puns

I told my friend that "Last night there was a rear-end collision in my parking lot. After that, the drunk guy that hit the car gave me $800 and drove away". My friend asked me "Is that enough to fix it?"

I said "I don't care, it wasn't my car."

Why did President Kennedy never get drunk?

He wasn't very good at taking shots.

The first mate on a ship rarely drinks

The first mate on a ship rarely drinks, but the crew threw him a party on his birthday and went out of their way to get him drunk. The next morning he woke up with a hangover, and went to the bridge. He opened the ship's log and found that the captain had written, "The first mate got drunk last night". He complained to the captain saying that it was very rare. The captain defended his entry saying that it was the truth, wasn't it? The next day the captain opened the ship's log, and the first mate had written, "The captain was able to stay sober last night."

So my son came home drunk at 2am.

I said, "excuse me, but you are out past curfew and I distinctly smell beer on your breath." "No dad, I'm sorry I'm home late but I wasn't drinking. My buddies and I were eating froglegs." So I looked at him and said, "I have been around for a while I know what beer smells like." He started to panic and said,"dad you're just smelling the hops."

EDIT : Apostrophe

Got home and into bed steaming drunk last night, and the wife was furious. She said I wasn't the man she married.

I knew exactly what she meant. I live next door.


Mr. Peanut was arrested for drunk and disorderly at a local Strip Club

The arresting officer said it wasn't the first time he'd busted a nut in front of a stripper and it wouldn't be the last.

Drunk driver

A woman gets into an accident while driving. She tries to explain to the officer that it wasn't her fault. She says the other guy was drinking and on his phone! The officer looks at the lady and says, "mam, he could do that in his own backyard.

I met a drunk ventriloquist at the bar last night.

She said I was the most handsome man she had ever seen. I wasn't sure if it was her or the beer talking.

The other night I got really drunk at a bar. I started telling some very racist jokes and when I looked up a good friend of mine who is black happened to be there. I felt awful about it and called him up to apologize first thing the next morning.

He said he wasn't even at the bar.

I went to bed with a 9 and woke up with a 6....

I wasn't drunk. She just changed positions.

For a first date date, my girlfriend wasn't impressed when I tried to drive over the frozen lake drunk.

But, it was an icebreaker.

You can explore i wasn t that drunk drunkard reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean i wasn t that drunk uninvited dad jokes. There are also i wasn t that drunk puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A drunk man stumbled up to me and asked what he should do if he finds a abandoned baby

"Beat it" wasn't a good answer.

My friend got drunk and thinks he had sex with a prostitute...

At first he wasn't sure, but then he was *positive*.

Apparently I need to listen more in church.

Turns out the preacher wasn't talking about Jim Beam when he asked if anyone had been drunk on the Holy Spirit.

My friend: "I wasn't that drunk last night"

Nah mate, you only took the shower head in your arms ant told it to stop crying

I wasn't that drunk last night...

I wasn't that drunk

"you were standing in my fireplace screaming 'diagon alley' "

I got drunk last night and my house wasn't where I left it.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the i wasn t that drunk pissed jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working i wasn t that drunk yoko piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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