I Had A Dream Jokes
89 i had a dream jokes and hilarious i had a dream puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about i had a dream that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest I Had A Dream Short Jokes
Short i had a dream jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The i had a dream humour may include short dream not found jokes also.
- My girl keeps having disturbed dream, shouting things like "Hobbit!", "Gandalf!", and "Mordor!". Always Tolkien in her sleep...
- My wife woke up just now. She is dreaming and muttering about how she wrote the lord of the rings trilogy. She's Tolkien in her sleep.
- What do you call a belt made out of lobsters? A waist of good seafood
I know it's bad but I heard it in a dream and had to share - Sweet dreams are made of cheese Who am I to diss-a-Brie? I cheddar the world and the feta cheese, everybody's looking for Stilton.
- Four years ago, I asked the girl of my dreams out on a date. Today, I asked her to marry me. She said no both times.
- I actually heard this joke in a dream this morning What do you call a little square that hasn't developed its new dimension yet?
Precubescent - I asked my boss if I can come to work a little late today He said Dream on. I think that was really nice of him.
- Last night I dreamed I was the author of The Lord of the Rings. I've been Tolkien in my sleep.
- I dreamed I drowned in an ocean made of orange soda. When I woke I realized it was just a Fanta sea.
- Last night I had a dream that I was eating a giant marshmallow and when I woke up my giant marshmallow was gone.
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I Had A Dream One Liners
Which i had a dream one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with i had a dream? I can suggest the ones about dream come true and fell asleep.
- I had a dream where I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram. I was like 0mg
- I dreamed I saw a color I never saw before It was just a pigment of my imagination.
- Just woke up from a dream about Roman numerals 5, 4, 1, and 500. It was VIVID.
- What do you call a bunch of employees caught sleeping on the job? A Dream Team.
- I was rejected from my dream art school because I used the wrong pencil. It wasn't 2B.
- Never give up on your dreams... Stay in bed.
- Maybe the Titanic really was a ship of dreams... and its dream was to be a submarine.
- Noone actually dreams in color. It's just a pigment of your imagination.
- All last night I dreamed I was a muffler... I woke up exhausted
- If you see a toilet in your dream, do not use it. It's a trap.
- They said I should follow my dreams So I went back to sleep.
- Landed my dream job at a guillotine factory Will beheading there tomorrow
- I had a dream in which my favorite pornstar died. I woke up with mourning wood.
- I would love to be paid to sleep It would be my dream job.
- I got into lucid dreaming recently its everything I imagined it to be.
Witty I Had A Dream Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about i had a dream you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dreaming of making jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make i had a dream pranks.
I had a dream that my friend Martin became the ruler of all bath sponge.
We called him Martin Loofah King.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The big bed...
Three salesmen are travelling together when their car breaks down. They walk to the nearest town and go into the bar. Over a couple of rounds of drinks, they explain their situation to the bartender who tells them,
"I have a bed in the back room. It's just one bed, but it should be big enough for all three of you to stay for tonight."
The three salesmen agree and continue drinking. At closing time, the bartender kicks all the other customers out and shows the salesmen to the room where the bed is. The three of them immediately pass out for the night.
The next morning, the man who slept on the left side of the bed says,
"Man, I had this incredible dream that I was getting a h**... from a beautiful woman!"
The man who slept on the right side of the bed says,
"Hey, I had a dream that I was getting a h**... from a beautiful woman as well!"
The man who slept in the middle says,
"I had a dream that I was skiing!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Dreams.
3 guys are camping, and after a night of drinks & laughs around the fire, they climb into their tent and fall asleep side by side.
The next morning, the guy on the left wakes up smiling. "I had a dream I was getting j**... off all night by a supermodel!"
The guy on the right chimes in. "Me too, but it was my hot neighbour!"
The guy in the middle looks a bit dejected. "Lucky b**.... I just dreamed I was skiing."
I had a dream that I was fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting and Tom Ripley
Thanks to months of therapy, I'm finally battling my Damons.
I had a dream that I kept falling into a big round dark abyss.
That's it. Thats the hole dream.
I had a dream about a breath freshener left on my pillow.
I ate it and it tasted like a fig. Then I woke up. Guess it was just a fig mint of my imagination.
I had a dream that I was a mechanic who fixed wrecked cars.
It was an auto body experience.
I had a dream last night that I was vacuuming with the Grim Reaper
I was Dyson with death
The President of Iran calls Trump & tells him "I had a dream last night...."
"New York was in ruins & aflame, with Iranian flags flying above."
Trump replies: "Funny, I had a dream last night too. Teheran beautiful and prosperous, happy people celebrating in the streets, with big banners hanging everywhere."
"What did the banners say?", asked the Iranian President.
"I don't know," Trump answers, "I can't read Hebrew."
I told my wife I had a dream that in a previous life she was Chinese...
... She told me that was impossible because she has never been Wong.
I had a dream that I was eating marshmallows...
...and when I woke up, I discovered I'd chewed my pillow to bits. I'm feeling okay, all things considered. Just a little down in the mouth.
I had a dream I was a wheel
I woke up tired
My dad told me joke today
A man and a woman are in bed, talking about their dreams.
the woman says, "I had a dream last night, I was at Walmart."
the man says, "I also had a dream. I was jn bed with three women."
The woman asks, "was I one of the three women?"
The man replies, "no, you were at Walmart."
I had a dream last night about dancing chickens...
It was like poultry in motion.
I had a dream where I was in a fight with Jason Bourne, Will Hunting, and Private Ryan.
I'm finally battling my Damons.
I had a dream I was in a part of the US that was filled with nothing but museums.
It was State of the Art.
I had a dream that I was sleeping.
You can imagine my disappointment when I woke up to find it wasn't real.
I had a dream that I ordered a package and it never came...
...It was a logistical nightmare.
Last night I had a dream I was eating noodles
But when I woke up I couldn't find my earphones
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I had a dream I ran an Indian restaurant staffed entirely by former s**... workers…
It was a naan profit whoreganization.
I had a dream I turned into a young chicken and had trouble changing back to being a human.
Luckily, I was able to pullet off...
A Russian meets his friend. He says, "Dima, my friend, you look so grim, what's the matter?"
"You see, Petya, every night my wife keeps having dreams where she's seeing Putin" says Dima.
"So?" says Petya.
Dima replies, "Yesterday I yelled at her and told her to stop seeing him."
"What happened next?" probes Petya.
And Dima replies, "Last night, I had a dream where an FSB colonel hinted at me that I should leave this matter alone."
I had a dream last night...
In my dream I was watching a band play. Buddha was playing guitar, Jesus was playing bass, Mohammed was singing, and Zeus was playing the drums. After the show, Zeus came down and gave me a large metal disc. I think it was a cymbal from god.
I had a dream the other night
I had a dream the other night. I was in the old West riding in a stagecoach. Suddenly, a man riding a horse pulls up to the left side of the stagecoach, and a riderless horse pulls up on the right.
The man leans down, pulls open the door, and jumps off his horse into the stagecoach. Then he opens the other door and jumps onto the other horse.
Just before he rode off, I yelled out, "What was all that about?"
He replied, "Nothing. It's just a stage I'm going through."
Hannah and Max are talking during recess...
Max finds Hannah really pretty. Thinking he's old enough for a girlfriend, he decides to try to flirt with Hannah.
"I just remembered, I had a dream about you last night!", Max did not, in fact, have a dream about Hannah last night.
"Oh, really? Was it a nice dream?", says Hannah, clearly flattered. Max starts to panic.
"Uh, I can't remember, I slept through it!"
I had a dream (true story) that I was watching YouTube videos on how to turn large animals into cars.
Taxidermy.
I have a dream
Well I had a dream, but I woke up and forgot it
The morning of his birthday, Timmy told his mom, I had a dream I got a BB Gun for my birthday. What do you think that dream means?
You'll know what it means tonight, Timmy's mom said with an encouraging smile. That night, after the birthday cake, Timmy's mom came in with a long narrow package and gave it to her son. Timmy tore the box open. Finally I get a BB gun, he thought. But he thought wrong. The box was empty except for a book called The Meaning of Dreams.
I had a dreamed I pooped the bed.
So it turns out dreams can come true!
I had a dream someone came in my apartment last night
When I got up, the door was still locked but I can't figure out what all this sticky stuff is.
I had a dream I was attacked in my kitchen by a giant head of cabbage. I grabbed a knife and stabbed, hacked, and slashed at it, but it still kept coming! I threw a jar of mayonnaise at it, to no avail -- then I hurled a bag of carrots, but nothing would stop it! In the end...
I fought the slaw and the slaw won.
So Donald Trump was golfing with his buddy the other day
His buddy said, "So I had a dream about you the other night."
"Really?" Said trump, "About what?"
"People in the hundreds of thousands were celebrating and cheering for you in the streets."
"Oh wow. How was my hair?"
"I don't know. It was a closed casket."
I had a dream about a billboard
I can't remember what it said but I'm sure it's a sign.
I had a dream I was dreaming...
Woke up to find I wasn't dreaming.
This may be bad but at least you're happy with your life.
I had a dream my family surprised me with an intervention.
It was a good wake-up call.
I had a dream
But she was underage.
I had a dream that I was watching Inception
And it really is a great idea, I should really watch it
Ricky Nelson would be proud
I had a dream the other night. I was at an Italian restaurant, as I was walking in unnoticed Lou Abbot and Mary Tyler Moore waiting to be seated and Corey Hart was leaving having already ate. I made a gesture and said Hello Mary, Lou, and goodbye Hart.
I had a dream last night that there was an ocean filled with soda
It was a fantasea
I had a dream I was in Dallas riding in the car with JFK...
It was mind-blowing.
I Had a Dream I was Leaving the Army....
I woke up with my discharge in my hand.
I had a dream about a woman who becomes a horse at night.
It was a nightmare.
I told my wife that last night I had a dream about a painter coming down from the Heavens to recreate her beauty on canvas
But after he saw her in person, he said that he had to return to heaven for more paint.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I had a dream about a f**... and felt really depressed.
Turns out im not a mourning person
I woke up this morning and told my wife that I had a dream I was trying to call her but she never answered...
She said "Sorry, I must have been awake."
So I had a dream last night about eating breakfast.
It was pretty *surreal.*
I had a dream last night that I was peeing...
Talk about a dream come true!
I had a dream that I was ridiculously light and was floating everywhere.
I was like 0mg.
I had a dream, Tim Cook was America's president.
But you just can't compare Apples to Oranges.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I had a dream my father was n**...
I had a dream last night that my father was chasing me around but n**... dressed as a cigar smoking pirate.
That's the last time a try lucid dream
I had a dream where a serial killer collected ears as trophies.
His room was very eary.
I had a dream I was stuck behind a giant bus all the way to work,
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Last night I had a dream that I was a gay man. There wasn't any s**... involved.
I just really, really liked Judy Garland and Abba alot.
I had a dream that the Netflix 'Skip Intro' button was removed...
Literally unwatchable.
I had a dream last night that felt like it was directed by M Night Shyamalan.
He kept telling me to stand places and shouting cut.
Last night I had a dream that I wrote the Lord of the Rings.
When I woke up my wife said I had been Tolkien in my sleep...
I fell asleep in the theater watching Selma and...
I HAD A DREAM!!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Bad dream. Kinda inappropriate
So after a long weekend of partying on a beach in Florida, these three men all have to book a hotel room. They had to book it last minute and got a hotel room with a single queen size bed. The middle man was a tall blonde male. He slept in the middle of the bed because he was the tallest. So when they wake up the next morning one of the guys go
I had a dream last night that a hot blonde babe j**... me off. The one on the other side said I did too she was tall and had huge hands, it was great.
The guy in the middle says that's so crazy, I had a dream that I was skiing.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three guys go on a skiing trip.
The lodge they check into only has one room available, so they decide to all sleep in the same bed. They go skiing and have a lot of fun, and come back to the lodge and go to bed.
The next day the guy who slept on the right side of the bed said, I had the most vivid dream that I was getting a h**... last night! The guy who slept on the left side said, That's incredible, I had the same exact dream!
The guy who slept in the middle said, That's funny, I had a dream I was skiing.
A presidential aide says to Trump; "Sir, I had a dream about your parade yesterday night."
"Was it yuge?" Trump asked, visibly interested.
"Oh, yes," said the aide, "there were millions of cheering people turning out to celebrate all along the streets."
"Was it tremendous? Trump asked, visibly excited.
"Oh, yes," the aid replied; "You were in a huge carriage, flanked by all the members of your family and cabinet."
Trembling with excitement and rubbing his hands together, Trump questions the aide: "And tell me, was I looking hot?"
The aide replies: "I didn't know, sir. The casket was closed."
Spent the entire day sleeping
I had a dream.
I had a dream about a demonic chair
It was chairifying!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three men going skiing
Three men go on a skiing trip, but when they get to the HOTEL they find out that the hotel have mucked up their rooms and they have to share one big bed. When they wake up the guy on the left says I had the most fabulous dream last night that I was getting a h**... from a smoking hot snow bunny, and then the guy on the right goes thats strange O had the same dream I was getting a h**... from my s**... ski instructor . Then the guy in the middle goes well thats strange because I had a dream I was skiing!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three friends are on a road trip and stop at a motel for the night.
Three friends are on a road trip and stop at a motel for the night. The receptionist tells them there is only 1 room available with 1 bed in it.
The guys are exhausted and just decide to share the bed. In the morning, the one who slept on the left side of the bed says "I just had the best dream last night, a hot girl was giving me a h**... and it felt so real". The one who slept on the right side says "That's weird, I had a similar dream."
They both turn to the friend who slept in the middle and ask him "What about you? Same dream?"
"Nah, I had a dream that I was skiing in the Alps"
Husband said to wife
I had a dream about us yesterday
Wife: what was it?
Husband: I saw we were in heaven. Now don't get angry, I was accompanied by a beautiful angel.
Wife: where am I in this?
Husband: When I looked back, you were there too. But you were accompanied by the Devil.
Wife suddenly gets up and goes to the kitchen.
Husband follows her and says: I told you not to get angry.
Wife: I am not angry, just sad.
Husband: And why is that?
Wife: You have beauty here and in heaven. As for me, I have the Devil here and in heaven.
I had a dream last night...
That a hamburger was eating me!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three friends go snowboarding
Three friends go skiing at a ski resort and have a great time.
However, when night descends upon them, they seek shelter at the resort.
They stay up for a little bit telling jokes and talking, then decide to hit the sack.
But once they enter the room that they will be sharing, they realize something was very wrong.
There was only one bed!
So they went and complained to the staff and they told them that was the only room left. Begrudgingly, they decide to just share the bed.
They awaken the next morning all refreshed and happy.
The friend on the left said to the others,"hey guys, I had a dream about getting a h**..., it was the best dream I ever had!" "That's weird, I had the same dream," the friend on the far right said. The friend in the middle said to the others, "Well that surly is strange, for I dreamt I was skiing."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three guys walk into a hotel...
They walk up to the front desk and ask what they have available. The man at the desk tells them they only have one room available, but there is only one bed. The three men aren't bothered by this and they decide to share the bed. In the morning the man who was sleeping on the far right of the bed says "it was so weird, last night I had a dream someone was giving me a h**...."
The man on the far left of the bed said he too had a dream that he received a h**....
The man who was in the center said "That is weird, I just had a dream that I was skiing."
I had a dream about Captain Crunch
It was really cereal
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three homeless guys at a shelter..
Due to a shortage of beds to lay in at a homeless shelter, three men were set to be laying together in a California King sized mattress. That night, the three go to bed.
They wake up the next morning to the alarm clock going off, waking the three up.
The man on the left says "Hmm, I had the oddest dream. I had a dream that I was being given a h**...."
The man on the right says "Yeah. Me, too."
The man in the center says "Hmm, that's weird. I dreamed I was skiing."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
so there are these three guys going on a skiing trip
and one day they are skiing when a massive blizzard arrives from the middle of nowhere. so they dig a snow cave because it's either that or death. they huddle up together for warmth during the night and fall asleep. in the morning the one on the right says 'i had a dream that someone touched my p**...!' the one on the left looks surprised and says 'i also had a dream that someone touched my p**...!'
the one in the middle says 'i had a dream that i was skiing'
