Hydrogen Jokes

128 hydrogen jokes and hilarious hydrogen puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hydrogen that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Are you looking to make your chemistry studies a bit more entertaining? Check out this fun article on hydrogen jokes, with topics such as hydrogen peroxide, hydrogen bonds, hydrogen energy, hydrides, manganese, and silicon! Get ready to laugh and learn about this important element!

Quick Jump To

Funniest Hydrogen Short Jokes

Short hydrogen jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hydrogen humour may include short oxygen jokes also.

  1. Oxygen, Hydrogen, Sulfur, Sodium, and Phosphorus walk into a bar. The bartender says: "OH SNaP"
  2. 39 digits of pi accurately calculates the circumference of the universe to the width of a hydrogen atom Scientists still can't determine how much is needed for your mother though
  3. Hydrogen walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Want a drink? Most of the good ones argon."
    Hydrogen doesn't react.
  4. Do you know how many hydrogen bonds I can disrupt? (Chemistry pick-up line) Enough to break the ice, how's it going?
  5. My friend asked me if I liked Chemistry jokes... So I said "Sodium Hydrogen Bromine Oxygen"
  6. So Hydrogen finally admitted to Sodium that she had been bonding with Oxygen Sodium reacted violently.
  7. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar One says, "I've lost an electron."
    The other says, "Are you sure?"
    The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
  8. Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar. OH SNaP! exclaims the bartender.
  9. A Hydrogen atom suddenly exclaimed: "I think I just lost my electron!" "Are you sure?" Asked its friend,
    "Yes" replied the first, "I'm positive."
  10. A Hydrogen atom walks into a bar... ...and asks for a shot.
    Bartender, "what's the occasion?"
    Atom, "I think I lost an electron."
    Bartender, "you sure?"
    Atom, "I'm positive."

Share These Hydrogen Jokes With Friends

Hydrogen One Liners

Which hydrogen one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hydrogen? I can suggest the ones about helium and hydroxide.

  1. H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4? Drinking.
  2. I was going to tell a Sodium and Hydrogen pun But NaH
  3. I was gonna tell a joke about Sodium and Hydrogen but... Nah.
  4. What did the oxygen atom in tuxedo say to the hydrogen atoms? Bond, Covalent Bond
  5. Fat women are like hydrogen single and abundant
  6. If H20 is water and H202 is Hydrogen Peroxide, what is H204? Drinking
  7. Why did Hydrogen hurt Iron? Because he wanted to see him Sulfur.
  8. How do hydrogen atoms find a new leader? They hold an *electron*.
  9. What did Helium do after Hydrogen and Oxygen became water? He didn't react at all.
  10. What's the matter? Hydrogen, mostly.
  11. I wanted to tell a joke involving Sodium and Hydrogen... But NaH.
  12. My chemistry teacher was talking about Hydrogen Bonding today. Sounds like a lot of FON.
  13. I'd tell a sodium and hydrogen pun But NaH
  14. Hydrogen is the smartest. The rest of the elements are denser.
  15. A goose's beak is composed of hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen and potassium. HONK

Hydrogen Atoms Jokes

Here is a list of funny hydrogen atoms jokes and even better hydrogen atoms puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Hydrogen atom walks into a bar and says to the barman: Have you seen an electron? I've lost mine"
    Barman:"You sure?"
    H.A.: "I'm positive"
    Yeah..sorry 'bout that.
  • Explaining what is hydroxyl acid to an atom... Hydrogen ion: OH^- I get it, it is water!
  • Two hydrogen atoms are at a party and bump into each other. The first one says, "Hey, grab that electron, it's mine!" "How do you know?" asks the second. "'Cause I'm positive!" the first replies.
  • Why is Helium more Catholic than Hydrogen? Because it has more atomic MASS
  • What happened when two hydrogen atoms collided? The doctor had to heal-ium.
  • Two hydrogen atoms are walking down a street... One of them trips and falls. His friend says, " are you okay? "
    " I dunno. I think I lost my electron! "
    "Are you sure? "
    "I'm positive!"
  • Two hydrogen atoms are at a party and bump into each other. The first one says, "Hey, grab that electron, it's mine!" "How do you know?" asks the second. "'Cause I'm positive!" the first replies.
  • What does a lawyer, a pine tree, and a hydrogen atom have in common? Absolutely nothing.
  • What is H20 Made out of? 20 hydrogen atoms.
  • Hey baby, are you a Hydrogen atom? 'Cause ever since I saw you we've been bonded.

Hydrogen Oxygen Jokes

Here is a list of funny hydrogen oxygen jokes and even better hydrogen oxygen puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Two Hydrogens walk into a bar and spot an Oxygen Feeling adventurous, they approach her and ask "Hey baby, can we interest you in a waterway?"
  • What did Oxygen say when he realized he is losing an argument with Hydrogen? OH
  • My hotel room has a partial water view! I would have preferred oxygen but hydrogen is nice, too.
  • Some elements walk into a bar... Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfer, sodium, and phosphorus all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "OH SNaP!"
  • If we are made of oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, and nitrogen. And the universe is made up of primarily oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, and nitrogen.Is this why I'm so spaced out?
  • Oxygen hydrogen sodium sodium Whats my name
  • What did the scientist say when he put oxygen and hydrogen together? OH.
    Disclaimer - I'm sure this has been used before, but I thought of it this morning and wanted to share it.
  • What did the oxygen atom say to the two hydrogen atoms? Man! This t**... is getting me wet!
  • Two hydrogen atoms and an oxygen atom had a t**...... Made me so wet.
  • What did the s**... deviant hydrogen say to the oxygen? Do you like b**...?
Hydrogen joke, What did the s**... deviant hydrogen say to the oxygen?

Hydrogen Peroxide Jokes

Here is a list of funny hydrogen peroxide jokes and even better hydrogen peroxide puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Two chemists are at a bar. One says, "I'd like some water." The other says "I'd like some Hydrogen Peroxide." The second one died. Of cancer, many years later.
  • My ex-girlfriend and I still have a lot of chemistry between us. Admittedly, it's the kind you get between acetone and hydrogen peroxide...
  • Why should you hire hydrogen peroxide as a divorce lawyer? It's a debriding agent.
  • What is the legendary chemical? h**...-OH (Hydrogen Peroxide)

Hydrogen Bond Jokes

Here is a list of funny hydrogen bond jokes and even better hydrogen bond puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Girls are like hydrogen bonds They just want to have FON!
  • Hydrogen Bonding? So much FON
Hydrogen joke, Hydrogen Bonding?

Laughter Hydrogen Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What funny jokes about hydrogen you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean nitrogen jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hydrogen pranks.

"Hydrogen Monoxide! Hydrogen Monoxide! Hydrogen Monoxide!" shouted Santa.

*Asking the Chemistry teacher to play Santa this year seemed to have backfired*

Two chemists walk into a bar.

The first chemist says "I'd like a glass of H2O." So the bartender gives him water. The second chemist says "I'd like a glass of H2O too." So the bartender also gives him water, because he knows what he meant and had no conceivable reason to be carrying hydrogen peroxide, much less to be giving it as a drink.

Some (eye-rolling) Chemistry Pick-up Lines for the Valentine's season

* Are you made of Carbon? Because it feels like my world revolves around you.
* You're my Lithium.
* Are you an anion? Because I'm positive we're meant to be together.
* My heart is made of Gallium. It melts when you're close to me.
* Are you Fluorine? Because i can't seem to get myself away from you.
* My heart burns like a mole of suns for you.
* If I could rearrange the periodic table, I'd put U and I together.
* Who needs Hydrogen if you're my #1?.
* I can feel a bond forming between us.
Any others would be appreciated

Hydrogen asks his parents, Sodium and Potassium if he can go to a party.

First, he asks his mom, Sodium. He knows that she is very strict and she will probably say no.
"Na," she says, exactly what he expects
He decides to ask his dad. He is much less strict, and was in a good mood. Maybe he can let Hydrogen go to the party.
"k," he says

Hydrogen walks into a bar

and yells "Oh no! I've lost my electron!"
The bartender says, "Are you sure?"
"I'm positive!"


Teacher: Describe hydrogen Student: It is a p**... element
Teacher: Who taught you that?
Student: You said it does not belong to a particular group and it reacts with almost all the elements in the periodic table.

A helium atom and a hydrogen atom were talking.

A helium atom and a hydrogen atom were talking.
Hydrogen says to helium, 'Hey, I think I've lost my electron.'
Helium replies 'Oh, are you sure?'
Hydrogen responds 'I'm positive'.

Two scientists walk into a bar The first one says I'll have some H2O. The second one says, I'll have some H2O too.

The bartender pours them both hydrogen peroxide because he's tired of their b**... every day

Hydrogen punched helium...

Helium didn't react.

Some chemistry students accidentally made hydrogen cyanide.

They were actually trying to create The Final Solution.

Hydrogen is a light, odorless gas, which, given enough time, turns into people.

\- Edward Robert Harrison, *Smithsonian Magazine*, December, 1995.

So s**... Doo mixes Ruthenium Hydrogen together with alcohol..


A chemist and his friend go to lunch. When asked what they want to drink,the chemist says, "I'll have some H2O." His friend says "I'll have some H2O too"

When they get their drinks, they both are fine because the waiter is a sensible person who is able to distinguish the difference between the chemical compound H2O2, hydrogen peroxide, and asking to have water, like his friend.

I would make a Sodium and Hydrogen joke but...

The fine bros own the rights to it :(

Sodium and Hydrogen should be friends.

NaH, sounds like a bad idea

The Hydrogen + ion got into a fight with the Hydrogen Oxide - ion online

The H + called the OH - too basic and the OH - called the H+ to acidic.

An intern is "spanking it" in the laboratory.

A scientist walks into the lab and catches the intern. He is in shock. "What on Earth are you doing?" he asks. The intern does not stop. He takes notes with his other hand and watches the hydrogen ionize. The scientist comes to the conclusion that the intern and the hydrogen are meant for each other; they are both in the excited state.

Chemistry Joke!

Hydrogen and Carbon are walking down the street when they run into each other.
The Carbon says to Hydrogen, "Are you all right? You don't look so good."
"I'm not feeling very well," says the Hydrogen. "I lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the Carbon.
"Yeah, I'm positive." says the Hydrogen.

Why didn't helium and hydrogen go on a date?

because He didn't want to.

Two chemists walk into a bar...

The first says the the bartender,
"I'll have some H2O,"
After which the second says
"I'll have some H2O too."
And they both enjoy their water, and get home safely to their families, because the bartender is a nice, reasonable man who would never serve Hydrogen Peroxide to a customer.

Oxygen and potassium went on a date... went ok.
Oxygen and magnesium went on a date.
The other chemicals were like 'omg'!
Two noble gases went on a date.
There was no reaction.
Two protons went on a date.
There was no attraction.
Hydrogen and chlorine went on a date.
They felt a little sour after it.
Hydrogen and nitrogen went on a date.
They had a basic night out.
Sodium and chlorine went on a date.
There was assault.
Potassium and water went on a date.
It was lit.

My ex-girlfriend is just like hydrogen monoxide

They are both unstable HOs.

Hydrogen and Carbon walk into a bar

Hydrogen: Hey I was thinking about starting a business about electrons and wanted to ask if you wanted to be a partner
Carbon: Sure! I've got nothing to lose!

Santa walks into a bar followed by 3 hydrogen monoxide molecules

h**... h**... h**...

I heared Sodium and Hydrogen were getting together

And I was like "NaH!"

What do you call a nitrogen atom having a 5-way o**... with 4 other hydrogen atoms?


What do you get when you put hydrogen into the air?


Two scientists walk into a bar. The bartender asks what they would like to drink. The first scientist says "I'll have a glass of H2O please." The second scientist says "I'll have H2O too."

The bartender gives them both water because he isn't a m**... and no bar serves hydrogen peroxide anyway.

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too".

The bartender then gives them two glasses of water because he doesn't keep freaking Hydrogen Peroxide on the bar counter.

When people tell me that the U.S. made the first hydrogen bomb, I always have to correct them...

It was obviously the n**... with their *Hindenburg*.

Which element on the periodic table is best at concealing itself?


Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20." The other says "I'll have H2O too."

The bartender then says "Sorry, sir. We do not serve hydrogen peroxide here."
Full credit to u/SubstantialEarthworm

Two guys walk into a bar

One of them says to the bartender ,"I'll have H2O" . The other guy says, "I'll have H20 too"
They both drink water because the bartender has enough common sense to not serve shots of hydrogen peroxide at a bar

How many periodic elements does it take to turn on a light?

Sulfur, Tungsten, Iodine, Technetium, and Hydrogen.

This is a little science joke my friend told me.

A 99kg man asks his friend if I eat 1kg of nachos, does that make me 1%nacho.? The friend replied to that
Well the human body is made up of sodium, oxygen, carbon and hydrogen. So that practically makes us 100% NaCHO

I heard that boron, ruthenium and hydrogen got into a fight recently

and I was like 'BRuH'

2 people walk into a bar

Bartender:What would you like sir
Man: I'll have some H2O
Bartender: What would you like other guy
Other Guy: I'll have some H2O too
Bartender: Coming Right Up!
Bartender:\*Brings First Guy Water\*
Bartender:\*Hands Second Guy Hydrogen Peroxide\*
Other Guy: Why did you give me Hydrogen Peroxide!?
Bartender:You asked for H2O2.

My mother pushed me to become a chemist, she said i would be rich

now im full of calcium, sulphur and hydrogen, but got no money

Nuclei and Electrons are the original hipsters of the universe.

They were hydrogen before it was cool.

Two hydrogen atoms are walking down a street

All of a sudden, one stops and says oh my goodness I've lost my electron! The other turns to him and says are you sure to which the first replies yeah! I'm positive!

I don't know why everyone is so upset about untraditional family structures, it's been happening in the animal world for years. For example, all water buffalos have three parents

One oxygen buffalo and two hydrogen buffalos.

Two scientists walk into a bar.

"I'll have your finest aged H2O2.", says the first.
"I'll have the same H2O2, too.", says the second.

The bartender served them both water because he paid attention in chemistry class and understood the decomposition process of hydrogen peroxide.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says I'll take a glass of H2O. The second says I'll take a glass of H2O too.

*Since the bartender is not a chemist, he has no idea that H2O2 is the chemical formula for hydrogen peroxide, and gives both chemists a glass of water.* 

A Hydrogen atom sits crying in the corner...

I approached and asked if he was okay. He said "No, I lost my electron"
I said "Are you sure?"
He said "Yes, I'm positive"
(This joke once scored me a week's extension on some chemistry coursework I hadn't been doing)

A chemist walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a glass of h2o and gets a cup of water

A second chemist walked in and said I'll have a glass of h2o too
The second chemist died after injesting hydrogen peroxide

Two hydrogen atoms decide that they want to ride on the Large Hadron Collider.

They jump on a plane to Switzerland and sneak in while no one is looking. As they start to speed up one of them realises that they have both lost their electrons. It mentions it to his friend who asks "Are you sure?"
It replys "I'm positive."

Hydrogen joke, Two hydrogen atoms decide that they want to ride on the Large Hadron Collider.

jokes about hydrogen