Hunting Life Jokes
17 hunting life jokes and hilarious hunting life puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hunting life that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Hunting Life Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good hunting life joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A guy goes with his girlfriend to stay at her parents' house for the holidays
The couple live in the city and the parents live on a farm. The boyfriend is unused to the quiet country life and after a couple of days he's pretty bored. His girlfriend's father comes in and says Hey young fella if you're looking for something to do, why not take the dogs out for a bit of hunting? There's a shotgun behind the laundry door. Guy comes back a couple of hours later, the father says How was it?
That was amazing! Have you got any more dogs?
teach a man to hunt and he will eat for life
hunt a man and he will never starve again
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two men are hunting in the woods...
One of them tries to shoot a bear, but misses and ends up being mauled by the bear. After the incident, as he is "bear"ly holding on to life the othe runs over and calls 911. "Help my friend and i were hunting and he got mauled by a bear, I think he's dead! " The woman on the phone responds "well we would love to help, but first can you make sure he's dead"....*BANG!!!!* .... " ok he's dead, what do I do next"
Why did the eagle spare the mouse's life?
He couldn't be buzzard to hunt it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Life must be really fun for a vulture.
Every day is a scavenger hunt.
What is the meaning of life for a debt collector who hunts grape farmers?
Raisin debt
A marriage license is like a hunting license
both allow you to take away a life.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An 82 year old man marries an 18 year old woman..
An 82 year old man marries an 18 year old woman, she becomes pregnant. The 82 year old man goes to the Dr. to see what the Dr had to say about the wife being pregnant.
The Dr. said let me tell you a story about this 82 year old man I know, This man went hunting every hunting season his whole life, never missed an event. One year he got ready to go hunting and grabbed an umbrella instead of his gun. He got to the b**... pond and saw a b**... pulled up the umbrella and said pow pow and the b**... fell over dead.
The Dr. asked the 82 year old patient what he thought happened to the b**... and the patient said I think someone else shot the b**....
So Prince Charles is hunting in the woods
When he notices a rustling in the bushes. After shooting at it he hears a yelp and goes to see what he's shot. To his horror, he's accidentally killed one of the Queen's corgis. "Oh Mother will be so angry" he thinks to himself. It is at that moment that he stumbles and knocks over a lamp on the ground and a genie appears and says "You freed me from the lamp, so I shall grant you a wish!" Delighted by this amazing coincidence, Charles says "Yes could you bring this dog back to life?" Sadly the genie replies, "I'm sorry but I cannot raise a living thing from the dead, it is too great a task even for me."
Crestfallen, Charles decides he may as well go for a selfish wish then and says "If that's the case, could you make Camilla beautiful?"
Awkwardly, the genie responds "So you shot your dog, huh?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A hunter visited a doctor who was about to give him a spinal tap...
Doctor says "Well this might hurt, I just want you do know." The hunter goes "don't worry doc, I've only been in pain twice in my life, this will be nothing."
So the doctor performs the spinal tap and sure enough, the hunter didn't flinch a muscle. Curious about the hunters statement, he asks "So, what are the two times you've been in pain"
Hunter says "I was hunting once and had to take a dump. I dropped my trousers and squated, and my n**... triggered a bear trap I didn't see"
Wincing, the doctor asks "And the second?"
Hunter says "When I ran of of chain"
A 98 year old man...
A 98 year old man goes to the doctor. He tells the doctor that he is in the best shape of his life. He can run around, his memory is great, and he just got his 18 year old girlfriend pregnant.
The doctor pauses, looks at him, and replies, "My neighbor went out hunting one day and instead of grabbing his shotgun on the way out, he grabbed his umbrella. While he was out he saw a rabbit. He pointed the umbrella at him and yelled 'BANG BANG!' The rabbit dropped over dead. What do you think of that?"
The old man answers, "I think someone else shot that rabbit."
The doctor points at him and replies, "Exactly!"
Two hunters from Moscow charter a small plane to fly them to Siberia to go bear hunting.
On landing, the pilot says, "Remember, this plane can only fly with two hunters, one pilot, and ONE bear."
The hunters go out and return with two bears.
So the pilot says, "I told you ONE bear!"
But the hunters point out that the previous year, on payment of an extra 100 rubles, the pilot had let them put two bears on board.
After long discussion centering on the impossibility of the thing and the disgraceful degree of inflation, the pilot takes 200 rubles and with much pushing and shoving the hunters get aboard with the two bears.
After struggling into the air and fitfully flying for about two hours, the plane gives up and plummets to the earth in a snowbank.
Climbing out from under the snow and the bears, the hunters ask the pilot where he thinks they are.
The pilot says, "About the same place where we crashed last year."
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Hunting Life One Liners
Which hunting life one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hunting life? I can suggest the ones about deer hunting and hunting trip.
- teach a man to hunt and he will eat for life hunt a man and he will never starve again
- Why did the eagle spare the mouse's life? He couldn't be buzzard to hunt it.
- What is the meaning of life for a debt collector who hunts grape farmers? Raisin debt
- A marriage license is like a hunting license both allow you to take away a life.
- Life must be really fun for a vulture. Every day is a scavenger hunt.