Huntin Jokes
14 huntin jokes and hilarious huntin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about huntin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Hilarious Fun Huntin Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What is a good huntin joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I like hunting with my vampire friends.
It's nice to crack open a boy with the cold ones.
I went hunting with my preacher.
We went hunting in the same spot together. A deer walked out and we both shot at the same time. Upon inspecting the deer, we couldn't find any bullet holes. I said "It must be yours preacher. The bullet was like your sermons. It went in one ear and out the other!"
Hunting gone wrong
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
I think my friend is dead! he yells. What can I do?
The operator says, Calm down. First, let's make sure he's dead.
There's a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, OK, now what?
I went hunting today and caught a breast
I used a booby trap
Hunting Gone Horribly Wrong
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
I think my friend is dead! he yells. What can I do?
The operator says, Calm down. First, let's make sure he's dead.
There's a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, OK, now what?
Shazza walks into the kitchen and finds Bruce with a fly swatter.
"Waddaya doin?" She asked.
"Huntin Flies" He responded.
"Oh. Kill any?" She asked.
"Yep, 3 blokes, 2 sheilas," he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. "How'd ya know that?"
He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."
Hunting cats would bring a disaster. Why?
Because there would be at least a cat as trophy.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was hunting a deer making its mating sound
At least it got penetrated
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Went hunting with w**... Nelson and we each got a turkey.
Now that's what I call killing 2 birds with one s**....
An exhausted hunter out in the woods stumbled across another hunter.
Hunter 1: "Am I glad to see you, I've been lost for three days."
Hunter 2: "Don't get too excited, friend, I've been lost for three weeks."
I was out hunting and got lost with my dad...
We were wandering around the woods for hours with no sight of the road. The sun was starting to set so I say to my dad,
I hear when you get lost, you are supposed to fire three shots in the air, and someone will come rescue you.
He said that sounded like a great idea! So he set off three shots into the air and we start to wait.
About 45 minutes pass and no one comes for us. I tell my dad to fire three more shots into the air. He does and This time we wait about an hour and a half. Still no one comes.
I tell my dad to try one last time but he says to me,
I'm sorry son, I'm all out of arrows.
Tried hunting a cow yesterday and lost it
I fired but is was a missteak
While out hunting Pokemon a passer by asked if that's what I was doing...
I said "You caught me!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hunting Polar Bears
A hunter decides he wants to hunt a polar bear in the northern tundra. He hires a plane and a guide to take him out in to the ice fields. He asks the guide if he has any advice on how to catch a polar bear.
"It's quite simple," the guide responds. "First you take your shovel and dig a large hole in to the ice. Then take this can of peas and sprinkle them around the hole."
Confused, the hunter asks, "How on earth is that going to help me catch a polar bear?"
The guide smiles, "When the bear bends over to take a pea, kick him in the ice hole!"
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