Hungover Jokes
28 hungover jokes and hilarious hungover puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hungover that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Hungover Short Jokes
Short hungover jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hungover humour may include short hangover jokes also.
- Guy: I'm hungover Girl: Stop flirting with me on the walkie talkies, someone's gonna hear us. Over.
- I woke up hung-over to the sound of my neighbour mowing his lawn. He'll have to mow around me. I'm not moving.
- Guy: I'm hungover Girl: Stop trying to flirt with me over the walkie-talkie, someone will hear. Over.
- If you're hungover, make sure to help out any alligators you see. I heard gator-aid will make you feel better.
- A limerick about my life right now I might soon be resting in clover,
At the end of my days as a rover.
But I'm still not appeased
Whether I've got disease,
Or just that I'm really hungover. - Is it just me or does everyone seem to get the same thing for their 21st birthday? Hungover
- An Anarchist hangover I'd say being hungover is confusing for Anarchists, they're in an absolute state, but can't accept it's legitimacy
- There's only four things you can be in life: sober, tipsy, drunk and hungover. Tipsy is the only one where you don't cry when you're doing it.
- The worst part about going to work hungover Is having to lie about having friends to drink with.
- Today i asked my friend how hungover he was... He replied. "Well on a scale of one to Amy Winehouse its not looking so good."
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Hungover One Liners
Which hungover one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hungover? I can suggest the ones about drunk and getting wasted.
- I'm currently a recovering alcoholic... But I prefer the term "hungover."
- My father is a recovering alcoholic. I've never seen him this hungover.
- I'm not hungover It's just the wine flu.
- I'd do anything to never be hungover again Except stop drinking
- What did one hungover dog say to the other? Woof, we had a ruff night, Max.
- What did the hungover middle eastern man say when he woke up? I falafel.
- Age is just the number of hours I'm hungover for.
- What do you get when you cross a tomato with a hungover pop singer? Keshup
Hungover Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about hungover you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hungry jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hungover pranks.
I was hungover this morning so I phoned work and said to the boss...
.. "I'm afraid I won't be in today, my father had a massive heart attack and died last night."
"That was your last chance Dave," he said, "I'm taking the 'and son' off the shop sign."
Bill Gates wakes up one morning, hungover, after a late night soirée at the foundation.
Melinda looks at him and says, "Wow, Bill, you don't look so good."
Bill replies, "Yeah I know, I feel like a million bucks..."
Sunday in church after St. Patrick's Day
It was a sunday after St. Patrick's day in the church of a small village in the west of Ireland. Obviously all the people were more or less hungover, which infuriated the pastor of the village.
"It's a disgrace how we celebrate our most important saint by indulging in binge drinking and other improper activities. If I could have all the wine in the world, I would throw it in the river!"
There was a wave of murmur among the churchgoers.
"If I could have all the beer in the world, I would throw it in the river as well!"
The people put their heads down in guilt, thinking about what they had done.
"If I could have all the SPIRITS in the world, I would throw them in the river with the beer and the wine!"
Now the church was completely silent.
After a short while, the musical conductor of the church spoke up, "Now let us sing hymn number 369, *'Shall We Gather at the River?'*"
---
I heard this story from the ambassador of Ireland in Finland.
So there is a mother and her daughter sitting on the plane.
They haven't taken off yet and are still on the runway. The daughter, who is pretty young, say four or five, looks out the window and gets to thinking....
"Mommy. If big dogs have puppies and big cats have kittens, then shouldn't big airplanes have little baby airplanes?"
And the mom, she's hungover and jet lagged.
"aw, baby, just go ask the stewardess"
So the daughter gets up to ask the flight attendant.
"Hey stewardess lady, if big dogs have puppies and big cats have kittens then shouldn't big airplanes have little baby airplanes?"
And the stewardss says "did your mother tell you to come ask me this?" The girl nods.
"well, you see, sweetheart, this is JetBlue. And we always pull out on time. That's why there's no baby airplanes. Go ask your mom about that."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three guys meet in class after a superbowl sunday, still super hungover from the night before.
The first guy pipes up and says 'Fuck. i got so drunk last night I blew chunks.' The second guy cuts him off nearly immediately screaming 'oh yeah? I was so drunk I emptied my bank account at the s**... club after. I have no money to pay rent now.' The third guy laughs at both of them and said 'that's nothing. I was so wasted last night, I sold my car to a homeless guy for 50 cents.' Finally the first guy cuts them both off. 'You guys don't understand.....Chunks is my girlfriends golden retriever.'
An anti-vaxxer is sitting at a bar.
He is a couple beers deep when the bartender shouts Free shots for the bar! On that man over there! And he points to a man the anti-vaxxer can't see.
The bartender then proceeds to walk down the bar pouring shots for each patron. When he gets to the anti-vaxxer, the man stops him from pouring the shot and says:
I have had quite a few beers tonight and I need to work tomorrow. I don't want to be hungover. How strong is the liquor?
Bartender: It's 100 proof.
Anti-vaxxer: That's too much proof for me. I'll skip the shot.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My mate lets his dog drink beer with us every time we stay over.
One time the dog had about 4 or 5 bottles of the stuff in one evening.
I woke up the next morning in his flat to go for a pee and saw the dog lying awkwardly in his basket looking a bit worse for wear. Hung-over, I'm sure.
I said How you feeling buddy?! mid-p**... and to my surprise he responded with just the word: Rough
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'd been out drinking, and knew I'd had way too much to drive my car safely.
I knew there was a breath testing checkpoint between the bar and my place, so I decided to take a bus. Sure enough, when the bus reached the checkpoint we were waved through. This morning though when I woke up, hungover as b**..., there was a d**... bus on my lawn and I don't know what the h**... is going on
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I hate when I wake up in the morning hungover with p**... drawn on my face,
Especially since I was drinking alone last night
