Hugging Jokes
37 hugging jokes and hilarious hugging puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hugging that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Is it possible to be both funny and affectionate at the same time? This article explores the humor of hugging jokes, diving into topics such as tree-hugging, embracing, and cuddling. Whether you're looking for a joke to tell your friends or new ways to be more attentive and loving, this article has it all.
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Funniest Hugging Short Jokes
Short hugging jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hugging humour may include short hugged jokes also.
- A thief pointed a knife at me and said "your money or your life" I smiled and told him I was married, so I have no money or a life. He dropped the knife and we hugged and cried for a moment.
- I told my dad to embrace his mistakes... I told my dad to embrace his mistakes.
He cried.
Then he hugged me and my brother. - My wife told me to kiss her like if we were in a soap opera I hugged her tight, kissed her with passion and then slapped her because how dare she?!
- I OBJECT! the defendant screams in court. The judge gives her a very emotional hug and says, No…you human.
- What's the difference between Mcgregor and Mayweather? Mcgregor hugs his wife and beats his opponents while
Mayweather beats his wife and hugs his opponents - Sometimes, I will squat to the floor, hug my legs, and lean forward. That's just how I roll.
- i told my girlfriend yesterday, she should learn to embrace her mistakes she seemed very content, because she instantly hugged me.
- My wife asked me how she looked I told her that she was a 10/10 and she hugged me, i had to inform her that 10/10 is still equal to 1
- A son asks his dad if he regrets anything about having a son at 16. Nuttin the dad responds with a straight face.
Thanks Dad the son says as he gives the dad a hug. - A son is coming out to his father "I'm gay" the son says.
"You aren't thinking straight" says the dad.
And then they laugh and hug, for it was a dad joke.
Share These Hugging Jokes With Friends
Hugging One Liners
Which hugging one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hugging? I can suggest the ones about hugs and kissing.
- I told my dad to embrace his mistakes He gave me a hug
- I told my wife she needed to start embracing her mistakes. So she gave me a hug.
- I can tell how uncomfortable a person is... ...just by hugging them for 18 minutes.
- I told my wife she should embrace her mstakes... She gave me a hug.
- My girlfriend told me to man up and embrace my mistakes I hugged her.
- I told my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
- You know you are fat when ... you hug a child and it gets lost.
- Always hug your enemies Then you'll know what size the hole needs to be in your garden
- You know you are fat when you hug a child and it gets lost.
- I told my husband he could embrace his mistakes So then he hugged our children.
- My dad told my mom to embrace her mistakes. She hugged him.
- What do you call a snuggly rabbit? Hugs Bunny
- I told my mother to embrace her mistakes She proceeded to hug me
- I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes She hugged me
- How do nudists greet each other? With a bare hug.
Tree Hugging Jokes
Here is a list of funny tree hugging jokes and even better tree hugging puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you call three hippies hugging a tree? A treesome.
- Paul Walker really loved nature... He even died hugging a tree.
- Jesus was a hippie He had sandals, long hair and he died hugging a tree
- Why didn't the hippie hug the tree? Because he didn't wanna get all sappy!
The Funniest Hugging Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What funny jokes about hugging you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hug day jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hugging pranks.
"I know where babies come from."
After coming home from school and sitting down on the couch, young Jenny proudly proclaimed "Mommy, I know where babies come from!"
Imagining storks and unicorns, her Mom said "OK, then why don't you tell me Honey."
Jenny says "The Mommy and Daddy take off their clothes and start hugging, then the Daddy's thingy stands up, and the Mommy kneels down and cleans her teeth with it."
Mom says "That's sweet Honey, but that's not where babies come from, that's where jewelry comes from!"
Little Johnny and his ball.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "mommy mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle joe last summer."
A man is kissing a tractor
A man is kissing and hugging a tractor
Another man goes up to him and says "what on earth are you doing to this tractor" the man replies explaining that him and his wife are having some marriage problems so a friend said that he should do some s**... thing to a tractor. (Attract her)
First time posting ever, sorry for any mistakes.
Trump comes to the fortune teller
Trump comes to the fortune teller and asks how she sees his future.
She looks into the crystal ball and says:
You are travelling down the Constitution Ave. On both sides are cheering and happy crowds with flags and flowers...Go on, tell me more! Jumps Trump.
Everyone is happy, people are hugging each other, continues the fortune teller.
And they shake my hands? Trump interrupts again.
No, the coffin is closed.
Chillin'
While you are reading jokes on reddit, I am sitting here in a chair that costs $2,000, hugging a stuffed animal that costs $150 and watching the Ant Man Quantumania movie on a 100" full HD 8k TV that costs $8,000 and nothing bothers me, not even the look of the furniture store employees who apparently want me to leave the store.
100K people are having s**... right now.
75,000 are kissing
50,000 are hugging
And you? Well, you're reading this.
^(Trust me, I'm not happy about this either)
A mother and her child were hugging ...
"Mommy," says the child, "am I adopted?"
"No, sweetie," replied the mother. "We haven't managed to find someone who will take you."
A deeply in love boy says to his girlfriend ...
"I might not be rich, nor have any money or expensive apartments, and even not be the owner of many companies like my friend Jack, but i love you, and i always will"
She, hugging him tight and already crying answered :
" If you really love me, will you introduce me to your friend Jack please ? "
I just learnt that boxing is about two guys fighting the urge to come out as gay...
I mean. Two shirtless men fighting over a belt and a purse.
And they have to have another guy near them at all times who's entire job is to stop them from hugging.
A boy was walking down the street when he saw a man further down slumped over his car...
As the boy came closer he realised the man wasn't slumped over the car, he was hugging and kissing it, all while bawling tears.
"What's wrong?" Asked the boy, "Is your wife making you sell the car?"
"No," answers the man. "She just got her license."
A man is kissing a tractor
A man is kissing and hugging a tractor Another man goes up to him and says "what on earth are you doing to this tractor" the man replies explaining that him and his wife are having some marriage problems so a friend said that he should do some s**... thing to a tractor.
My car ran out of gas, and then started hugging everyone...
It was on E
Just did some crunches while hugging my cat
Just trying to get purrfect abs
Why are tennis players always hugging?
Because they always start their matches at love all
(A joke from my Alexa)
What did the midget say hugging the blonde's leg?
Your hair smells nice
You have just fallen down from the Moon.
You dust yourself and start hugging everyone, in tears.
The journey has made you thirsty and you take a bottle of Coca-Cola.
The ambulance arrives and they bring you to the psychiatric clinic.
Were you really on the Moon?
