Hotdogs Jokes

Following is our collection of Hotdogs funnies and chistes working better than reddit. They include dirty puns, clean gags suitable for kids, that are actually fun like the best witze.

The Best Hotdogs jokes

Men think about sex every 7 seconds...

Which is why I eat hotdogs in under 6 seconds... So it doesn't get weird.

Why do all hotdogs look the same?

Because they are in bread.

Why do Germans fear hotdogs with cheese?

Because for them, it is a Wurst-Kรคse scenario.

Did you hear about the incestuous hotdogs?

They say they're in bread.

They say the average man thinks about sex every 6 seconds

That's why I try to eat hotdogs in 5

Apparently, men think about sex every seven seconds...

I make sure I eat my hotdogs within 6 seconds so it doesn't get weird.

Two men with Alzheimer's are sat in a park...

... when they hear an ice-cream van pull up nearby. Bob turns to Bill and asks 'do you want an ice-cream Bill?'
Bob says 'yes please, but don't forget the chocolate sauce.'

Bob says 'I won't forget, don't worry. Anything else?'

Bill says 'in that case, I'll have some chopped nuts on it too. Don't forget now.'

Bob says 'I won't, don't worry. Chocolate sauce and chopped nuts, coming right up' and

Bob wanders off in the direction of the ice-cream van.

After 40 minutes, Bob finally turns up with two hot-dogs. Bill says 'you fool Bob! I knew you'd forget! I wanted mustard on mine!'

Welcome to Dick's hotdogs,

if you like hotdogs, you'll love dicks.

Grilled some hotdogs and offered my friend one

He said, "No thanks, I'm Jewish."

I said, "Don't worry, they're free."

Border collies are not very inbred...

You know what dogs *are* inbred?


When I was a kid I could go to the store with only $5 and come home with bread, milk, hotdogs and my favorite candy. You can't do that these days...

Too many damned security cameras.

I'm so homophobic,

I eat my hotdogs sideways.

A man walks into a bar...

A guy walked into a bar and saw a sign that said:

cheeseburgers 3$

hotdogs 5$

handjobs 10$

He goes to the bar and asks the lady "are you the one that gives handjobs" and she said yes, then he replied "well wash your hands I want a cheeseburger

I go to the store and buy ten hotdogs, nine burgers, three bags of chips, and six sodas. If I eat nine hot dogs, seven burgers, three bags of chips, and drink five sodas, what do I have?

No self control

My girlfriend asked me if hotdogs were good for her diet

I replied, "They're not the wurst"

What do neckbeards like on their hotdogs?


Why do Chinese people love NY?

Because they heard we sell hotdogs for $0.75 each.

Some people hate hotdogs.

I relish them

Two hotdogs

Two hotdogs were frying in a frying pan. 1st hotdog : "Help help, I'm burning! I will die! Get me out of here!" 2nd hotdog (to himself) : "Jesus Christ, a talking hotdog."

What's the pinnacle of confusion?

Two blind gay men, in a bathtub full of hotdogs.

I like hotdogs more than brats

Brats are just the wurst!

I take my time while putting toppings on my hotdogs.

I choose to relish the moment.

What happens when you turn flying mammals into hotdogs?

Things go from bat to wurst

What do dung beatles like on their hotdogs?


What did Alex say to his college roommate to get him to stop working on his college essay and come out for hotdogs

Relish today...

And Ketchup tomorrow

What are Polish hotdogs made out of?

Retarded pigs

What did the Buddhist order from a hotdogs vendor? (and two other Buddhist jokes)

One with everything

What kind of vacuum cleaner did the Buddhist buy?

One with no attachments

What did the Buddhist eat for breakfast?


[credit to my friend Geoff for first two]

Why are German hotdogs the most controversial?

It's because they make the best and the wurst ones

Whats fine one way but illegal when reversed?

Putting cow anuses into hotdogs.

People who tell you it's disgusting to eat hotdogs because they're made of the discarded parts of the pig are the same people who admire the Native Americans for using the whole animal.

How many people would still eat hotdogs if they were actually made out of dogs?

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