hostile Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious hostile puns

A reporter goes to the Middle East for an interview.

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Man: "Yes!"

Reporter: "Name?"

Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."

Reporter: "Sex?"

Man: "Three to five times a week."

Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"

Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."

Reporter: "Holy cow!"

Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."

Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"

Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."

Reporter: "Oh dear!"

Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Do you speak english?

- Yes
- Name?
- Abdul bal-Rhasib
- Sex?
- Three to five times a week.
- No, no... I mean male or female?
- Yes, male, female, sometimes camel.
- Holy cow!
- Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.
- But isn't it hostile?
- Horse style, doggy style, any style!
- Oh dear!
- No, no! Deer runs too fast.

πŸ‘πŸΌ

Do you speak English ?

- Yes.
- Name?
- Abdul Al-Rhasib.
- Sex?
- Three to five times a week.
- No, no... I mean male or female?
- Yes, male, female, sometimes camel.
- Holy cow!
- Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.
- But isn't it hostile?
- Horse style, doggy style, any style!
- Oh dear!
- No, no! Deer runs too fast...

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How I picked my career.

I was driving down the street, when I was cut off by someone. I honked frantically, applied the brakes masterfully and dodged a sure accident. At the next set of lights, I pulled up beside the perpetrators and it was a car with 4 black men in it. I gave them the finger, and they became hostile towards me. They called me a "fucking cracker" and "a stupid white boy" I told them to "learn how to drive" and " pay some fucking attention". They scoffed at me, and began to drive ahead, only to be Tboned by an on coming fire truck. Amongst our argument, the driver must not have heard the siren. I reflected on my behaviour and thought "shit, that coulda been me". So the next day I went out and became a fire fighter.

πŸ‘πŸΌ

+Do you speak English?

-Yes!

+Name?

-Abdul Al-Rhazim.

+Sex?

-Three to five times a week.

+No, no... I mean male or female?

-Yes, male, female... Sometimes camel.

+Holy Cow!

-Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.

+But isn't that hostile?

-Horse style, dog style, any style!

+Oh dear!

-No, no deer! Deer runs too fast, hard to catch!

πŸ‘πŸΌ

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Man: "Yes!"

Reporter: "Name?"

Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."

Reporter: "Sex?"

Man: "Three to five times a week."

Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"

Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."

Reporter: "Holy cow!"

Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."

Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"

Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."

Reporter: "Oh dear!"

Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Abdul Al-Rhazim

An interviewer is interviewing a man.

Interviewer: Name?

Interviewee:Abdul Al-Rhazim.

Interviewer:Sex?

Abdul Al-Rhazim: 3-5 times a week.

Interviewer: No, no, I meant male or female!

Abdul Al-Rhazim: Yes, male, female, sometimes camel.

Interviewer: Holy cow!

Abdul Al-Rhazim: Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.

Interviewer: But isn't that hostile?

Abdul Al-Rhazim: Yes, horse-style, dog-style, any style.

Interviewer: Oh dear!

Abdul Al-Rhazim: No, no. Deer run too fast. Too hard to catch.

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Interview

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Reporter and Man,,,

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Excuse me, may I interview you?

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Interview with Abdul

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Captains Pants (one of my favorites)

One day, a scout on a small ship sees another equally sized ship on the horizon.

He tells the captain that the ship looks hostile, so the captain orders everyone on board to ready the cannons.

He then tells the scout to bring him his red shirt so that way his blood will not show and the men on board will continue to fight and not be afraid if he was injured.

After a long and weary battle, the day is won.

The very next day, 10 ships appear on the horizon, and the scout tells the captain.

The entire crew waits to here what he has to say.

Staring at the approaching ships the captain says, "Bring me my brown pants."

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What does the soil have in common with a mailman?

They both become hostile when you rearrange their letters.

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Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Man: "Yes!"

Reporter: "Name?"

Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."

Reporter: "Sex?"

Man: "Three to five times a week."

Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"

Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."

Reporter: "Holy cow!"

Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."

Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"

Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."

Reporter: "Oh dear!"

Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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The reporter and the arab

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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Interviewing Arab for US visa


Interviewing an arab for a visa

Consul : What is your name?
Arab: Abdul Aziz

Consul: Sex?
Arab : Six to ten times a week

Consul: I mean, male or female?
Arab : Both male and female and sometimes even camels.

Consul: Holy cow!
Arab : Yes, cows and dogs too!!!!
Consul: Man,........isn't it hostile?
Arab : Horse style, dog style, any style

Consul: Oh..........dear!
Arab : Deer? No deer, they run too fast

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A close friend told me his wife had a hostile womb...

For some reason, he was upset when I asked if I could take up residency.

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In a surprise move, Taco Bell is acquiring Taco Bueno...

It's a hostile tacover.

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Do you speak English?

- Yes!
- Name?
- Abdul al-Rhazib.
- Sex?
- Three to five times a week.
- No, no...I mean male or female?
- Yes, male, female, sometimes camel.
- Holy cow!
- Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.
- But isn't that hostile?
- Horse style, doggy style, any style!
- Oh dear!
- No, no! Deer run too fast...

πŸ‘πŸΌ

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Mohammed Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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"May I interview you?"

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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An Arab national is interviewed at the Embassy for a visa:

Consul: Your name please?







Arab: Abu Zina.







Consul: Sex?







Arab: Every day.







Consul: Er, I mean, male or female?







Arab: Don't matter, sometimes even Camel.







Consul: Holy cow!







Arab: Yes, cows and donkey too.







Consul: Isn't that hostile?







Arab: Hosstyle, Dogstyle, any style!.







Consul: Oh dear!







Arab: No deer! run too fast.

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Better formatted version Reporter and Man...

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"

πŸ‘πŸΌ

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

πŸ‘πŸΌ

Do you speak English?

Do you speak English?
-Yes!

Name?

- Abdul al-Rhazib.

Sex?

- Three to five times a week.

No, no... I mean male or female?

- Yes, male, female, sometimes camel.

Holy cow!

- Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.

But isn't that hostile?

- Horse style, doggy style, any style!

Oh dear!

- No, no! Deer runs too fast...

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An Arabian guy at the airport

- name?
- ahmed al-rhazib.
- sex?
- three to five times a week.
- no, no… i mean male or female?
- male, female, sometimes camel.
- holy cow!
- yes, cow, sheep, animals in general.
- but isn't that hostile?
- horse style, doggy style, any style!
- oh dear!
- no, no! deer run too fast

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This Cracked Me Up.

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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May I interview you?

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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top jokes

Reporter: Excuse me, may I interview you?
Man: Yes!
Reporter: Name?
Man: Ahmed Al-Bakir.
Reporter: Sex?
Man: Three to five times a week.
Reporter: No no! I mean male or female?
Man: Yes, male, female… sometimes camel.
Reporter: Holy cow!
Man: Yes, cow, sheep… animals in general.
Reporter: But isn't that hostile?
Man: Yes, horse style, dog style, any style.
Reporter: Oh dear!
Man: No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch.

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I wanted to be friends with...

Hoping to become friends, I started talking to a sea anemone. After a couple minutes of talking, I asked him about his family, and he became hostile.

It was a touchy topic.

*

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Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Man: "Yes!"


Reporter: "Name?"


Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."


Reporter: "Sex?"


Man: "Three to five times a week."


Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"


Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."


Reporter: "Holy cow!"


Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."


Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"


Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."


Reporter: "Oh dear!"


Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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What do you call a cougar that's hostile to you?

An enemilf.

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Two men were hiking in the Australian Outback.

Two men were hiking in the Australian Outback when an emu walked up to them.

One of the men was thrilled to see an emu so close up. The other man was more hesitant, for he read that emus can be very aggressive and hostile.

The man started to yell at the emu, "Go away, you big, fat, stupid, flightless bird! We don't want you here!"

The other man responded, "Dude, stop ostracizing it."

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Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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"No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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What are the most funny Hostile jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Hostile? Well, here are the best Hostile dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Hostile pick up lines to share with friends.

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