Horn Jokes

Funniest Horn Short Jokes

Short horn jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The horn humour may include short hone jokes also.

1. What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a guy who fixes bicycle horns? One's motto is 'Be Prepared', the other's is 'Beep Repaired'
2. I wish life was more like hockey... Who doesn't want a horn to sound when their period ends?
3. Why do farmers put bell on their cows? Because their horns don't work.
   (From my 6yo who loves her new joke book.)
4. What's the smallest unit of time in the known universe? The interval between the traffic light changing to green and the taxi driver behind you honking his horn.
5. What do you call a horse with the horn? A unicorn. What do you call a horse without the horn? A eunuchorn.
6. Why do cows wear bells around their necks? Because their horns don't work
   8 year old brother just told me this joke, thought it belonged here
7. A Boy Scout decided to start a business fixing horns on cars and trucks… He called it "Beep Repaired."
8. If I were a trumpet player I would constantly borrow other people's trumpets. I'd hate to toot my own horn
9. Gabriel's horn is a geometric figure which has infinite surface area but finite volume This is in contrast to a vuvuzela which has a finite surface area but infinite volume
10. What do you call a group of medical professionals who navigate around the Horn of Africa without being accosted by pirates? Doctors without boarders.

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Horn One Liners

Which horn one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with horn? I can suggest the ones about throat and hoot.

1. {air horn sound} {second air horn sound}
   Me: this isn't deodorant
2. What do you call a unicorn that's had its horn removed. Eunuchorn
3. Why do cows wear bells? because their horns don't work.
4. My daughter just made this one up… What do you call a unicorn with two horns? A goat.
5. I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.
6. I can put both of my legs behind my head. Y'know, not to toot my own horn or anything.
7. What do you call an animal that got its horn cut off ? A Eunuchorn
8. What is special about unicorns? Their unique horns.
9. What do you call a cheap trumpet? A frugal horn
10. What do you call a battle where the only weapons are truck horns? A fight to the deaf!!
11. What has one horn and gives milk? A milk truck,
12. What happened to the jazz player whose wife left him? He had to toot his own horn.
13. Which mythical creature has the hardest time reproducing? A Unic- horn.
14. What happens when you cross a rhinoceros with a dolphin? You get horn-ee-ee-ee-ee
15. What do you call a unicorn that had its horn cut off? A eunuchorn!

Car Horn Jokes

Here is a list of funny car horn jokes and even better car horn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Daddy, what are all those cars' horns honking for? It's for a wedding son.
  I thought the horn was supposed to be only used as a warning.
  Exactly son.
• What does the mechanic say after he's fixed your car's horn? Beep repaired.
• What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn? Beep repaired...
• When was the first car horn used? Exactly 0.001 seconds after the first traffic light turned green.
• What is a NYC nanosecond? If you are stuck at a red light, its the time that it takes for the occupant of the car behind you to honk his horn when the light turns green.
• What does the horn sound like on a marshmallow car? Peep. Peep.
• Horn and wedding Mommy, why are all the cars beeping their horns?
  
  Because there's a wedding going on.
  
  But isn't the horn a warning signal, Mommy?
  
  Exactly, son.
• A Jamaican is sightseeing in Egypt. A vehicle drives by, beeping its horn. "Coo yah!" he says. "It's tootin' car, mon!"
• I changed my car horn to gunshots People get out of the way much faster now
• Someone just honked their horn to get me out of my parking space quicker so now we will both be here until we're dead.

Cow Horn Jokes

Here is a list of funny cow horn jokes and even better cow horn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Why do cows wear bells? Why do cows wear bells?
  ​
  ​
  Their horns don't work.
• How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? The bull has horns, and the cow is the udder one.
• Q: Why is the barn so noisy?
  A: Because the cows have horns.
• Why do cows have bells? Because their horns don't make any noise
• Which cow needs to wear a bell? The one whose horns don't work.
• Q: Why does a cow wear a bell around its neck?
  A: Because its horns don't work.
• And is why cows wear bells Do you know why cows wear bells?. Its cause their horns arent working.
• Why do cows wear bells around their necks?
  Because their horns don't work.
• Q: Why is the barn so noisy?
  A: Because the cows have horns.
• Why are barns so noisy? All the cows have horns

Unicorn Horn Jokes

Here is a list of funny unicorn horn jokes and even better unicorn horn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What has one horn and isn't magic? A dead unicorn.
• Where do unicorns like to drink? The horn pub!
• Why are giraffes real but unicorns aren't? What's more believable a horse with a horn or a leopard moose camel with a 40 foot neck?
• what do you call a unicorn with 2 horns and 2 tails? bizarre.
• Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
• What do you call a Unicorn with his horn cut off? a e**...-horn! :D
• What do you get if you remove the horn from a unicorn? A e**...
• What happens when a unicorn loses its horn? He becomes a e**....

Rhino Horn Jokes

Here is a list of funny rhino horn jokes and even better rhino horn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Two big, strong, grey animals are talking to each other... Animal 1: Hey, you realize we have horns on the top of our heads right?
  Animal 2: Rhino
• What's the diagnosis for an animal with a horn and a major drinking problem? Rhino's Cirrhosis
• "Okay Fred, Shaggy and Daphne, can you name an animal that lives in africa and has a large horn on its face?" "Rhino!"
  "We know you know the answer, s**..., but it's not your turn."
• What do you call a rhino with no t**...? A e**... horn.

French Horn Jokes

Here is a list of funny french horn jokes and even better french horn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• How many French horn players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 100, 1 to screw it in and 99 to say how they could do it better.
• What do you call someone who teaches people how to play the French horn? A tooter.
• How do you make a t**... sound like a French Horn? Stick your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Horn Jokes and Friends

What funny jokes about horn you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean chin jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make horn pranks.