Hopeful Jokes
27 hopeful jokes and hilarious hopeful puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hopeful that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Hopeful Short Jokes
Short hopeful jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hopeful humour may include short optimistic jokes also.
- I invited my girlfriend to go to the gym with me and then I didn't show. I hope she gets the message that we're not working out.
- My friend just told me, 'I hope you die in a deep hole filled with water'. I know he means well.
- My friends say there is a gay guy in our circle of friends I really hope it's Todd, he's cute.
- I hope that when kim kardashian goes to the beach, she doesn't swim. The last thing we need is more plastic in the ocean.
- My mum suffers with short term memory loss Hope it doesn't run in the family because my mums got it too
- If I were a farmer, how would I measure my height? From my head, tomatoes.
Hope no one has heard this before, thought of it while driving. - There is still hope for for Hillary Clinton Nelson Mandela became President after 27 years in prison.
- My wife packed my bags and told me to leave . . . As I was headed out the door, she said "I hope you die a long, slow, painful death." I said, "so now you want me to stay?"
- I call my girlfriend Bambi. She thinks it's because she's cute. I just really hope her mom gets shot.
- Jussie smollet had to pay 10,000 to chicago and do community service to get his charge dropped... I hope he isnt beating himself up over this
Share These Hopeful Jokes With Friends
Hopeful One Liners
Which hopeful one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hopeful? I can suggest the ones about hoping and hopes.
- I hope elon musk never gets involved in a scandal Elongate would be really drawn out.
- Dads are like boomerangs. I hope.
- Translated from German, I hope this works: What's 3x3? No
- I hope Death is a woman That way it will never come for me
- What do you get when you cross Father's Day and Cake day? Extra Karma... I hope.
- Wife asked me to get "bath stuff" for xmas. Hope she likes her toaster.
- Painted my computer black hoping it would run faster... Now it just doesn't work.
- To the guy who stole my antidepresants, I hope you're happy now
- I can't remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 and 500 in roman numeral I M LIVID
- A Robber entered my home in hopes of finding money..... I joined the search with him.
- I married a beautiful woman - a smart one too. Hopefully they'll never meet.
- I hope death is a woman That way it wont come for me
- Some say 1 out of 4 of your friends are gay or bisexual.. I hope it's Ted, he's cute!
- My friends say one of us is gay. I really hope it's Todd... he's cute.
- I surely hope Death is a woman That way it never comes for me.
Howlingly Hilarious Hopeful Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What funny jokes about hopeful you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hope and change jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hopeful pranks.
In the 18th century, a hopeful Asian laborer landed in America and went straight to the employment office.
He didn't speak a word of English, and the men at the employment office couldn't figure out where he was from. They took a vote to see if he was Chinese or Japanese.
It was a Thai.
A man has been sleeping around and was worried he may have contracted AIDS. He goes to the doctor to get a check up. The doctor returns and says I have two good news for you
The man perplexed but hopeful asks: what's the first good news?
Doctor replies, you don't have AIDS!
The man relieved but now even more curious asks the doctor, then what's the other good news?
Doctor responds, we found a new strain of STD and they're going to name it after you!
Nobody wants to be alone. A recently divorced friend of mine is hopeful of once again finding romance. Beer belly, completely bald.....
I don't like her chances.
A man walks into the Sheriff's office...
A man walks into the sheriff's office... "I want to become a deputy!"
"Good, I want to you to catch this man" says the sheriff handling the man a wanted poster.
The poster reads : 'Last seen wearing a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper pants, and brown paper boots.'
"What's he wanted for?" asked the hopeful yound man.
"Rustling."
Police are reporting that they have just located a truck of stollen goods
Though they are not hopeful that anyone will come forward to claim the German fruitcake.
Two m**... dispensaries created a merger deal, becoming one.
To be blunt, the stakes were high, but they were hopeful as it was a joint venture.
There's a boy-band fan club whose members are all gay called the Hopeful Rooks.
Eventually they want to be able to move back and forth in One Direction as much as they want.
p**... Training
p**... training my toddler can be likened to the maiden voyage of the Titanic...
At the beginning we are hopeful and excited but by the end everyone's crying and wet.
People seem very hopeful about the news of water in Mars.
But I take it with a grain of salt.
£10,000 worth of devices were stolen from an apple store last night.
Police are hopeful that the 3 phones will be found.
Olympics synchronized-diving hopeful from a country so poor he had to practice in a pool with one diving board . . .
And a mirror.
Christmas Dinner with the inlaws
Me: Don't forget you're eating for two.
Mother\-in\-law (hopeful): You mean...
Wife: Yep, I've got a tapeworm!
