Hopeful Jokes
27 hopeful jokes and hilarious hopeful puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hopeful that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Hopeful Short Jokes
Short hopeful jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hopeful humour may include short optimistic jokes also.
- I invited my girlfriend to go to the gym with me and then I didn't show. I hope she gets the message that we're not working out.
- My friends say there is a gay guy in our circle of friends I really hope it's Todd, he's cute.
- My mum suffers with short term memory loss Hope it doesn't run in the family because my mums got it too
- If I were a farmer, how would I measure my height? From my head, tomatoes.
Hope no one has heard this before, thought of it while driving. - There is still hope for for Hillary Clinton Nelson Mandela became President after 27 years in prison.
- Jussie smollet had to pay 10,000 to chicago and do community service to get his charge dropped... I hope he isnt beating himself up over this
- Someone told me there's a gay guy in my circle of friends... I hope it's Michael. Hes cute.
- I hope they serve cookies at the Royal Wedding this weekend Just to show how a touch of brown sugar makes a ginger snap.
- McDonald's tried to create a beef version of the McRib, but failed. Hopefully, they learned from their McSteaks.
- A verdict has been reached in the Jussie Smollett trial. I hope he doesn't beat himself up over this, again.
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Hopeful One Liners
Which hopeful one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hopeful? I can suggest the ones about hoping and hope and change.
- I hope elon musk never gets involved in a scandal Elongate would be really drawn out.
- Dads are like boomerangs. I hope.
- Translated from German, I hope this works: What's 3x3? No
- What do you get when you cross Father's Day and Cake day? Extra Karma... I hope.
- Wife asked me to get "bath stuff" for xmas. Hope she likes her toaster.
- I can't remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 and 500 in roman numeral I M LIVID
- I married a beautiful woman - a smart one too. Hopefully they'll never meet.
- Some say 1 out of 4 of your friends are gay or bisexual.. I hope it's Ted, he's cute!
- i hope people on September 2nd 1885 were flipping out on Back to the Future Part III day
- Happy thanksgiving Guys! I hope Internet Explorer sends this in time.
- Hoping to get a 4k tv after Christmas. Making my new years resolution 3840 x 2160.
- To whoever stole my antidepressants at work last night... I hope you're happy now.
- I cheated on a girl that was a bartender. I hope she gives me another shot.
- Almost done watching that Netflix special on Epstein. I hope it doesn't leave me hanging.
- I hope Jessica Biel names her first child Batmo.
Howlingly Hilarious Hopeful Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What funny jokes about hopeful you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fingers crossed jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hopeful pranks.
In the 18th century, a hopeful Asian laborer landed in America and went straight to the employment office.
He didn't speak a word of English, and the men at the employment office couldn't figure out where he was from. They took a vote to see if he was Chinese or Japanese.
It was a Thai.
A man has been sleeping around and was worried he may have contracted AIDS. He goes to the doctor to get a check up. The doctor returns and says I have two good news for you
The man perplexed but hopeful asks: what's the first good news?
Doctor replies, you don't have AIDS!
The man relieved but now even more curious asks the doctor, then what's the other good news?
Doctor responds, we found a new strain of STD and they're going to name it after you!
Nobody wants to be alone. A recently divorced friend of mine is hopeful of once again finding romance. Beer belly, completely bald.....
I don't like her chances.
Police are reporting that they have just located a truck of stollen goods
Though they are not hopeful that anyone will come forward to claim the German fruitcake.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two m**... dispensaries created a merger deal, becoming one.
To be blunt, the stakes were high, but they were hopeful as it was a joint venture.
There's a boy-band fan club whose members are all gay called the Hopeful Rooks.
Eventually they want to be able to move back and forth in One Direction as much as they want.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
p**... Training
p**... training my toddler can be likened to the maiden voyage of the Titanic...
At the beginning we are hopeful and excited but by the end everyone's crying and wet.
People seem very hopeful about the news of water in Mars.
But I take it with a grain of salt.
£10,000 worth of devices were stolen from an apple store last night.
Police are hopeful that the 3 phones will be found.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Olympics synchronized-diving hopeful from a country so poor he had to practice in a pool with one diving board . . .
And a mirror.
What was the hopeful knife's favorite Ramones song?
I wanna be serrated
A man walks into a bar,
And sees a bunch of meat hanging from the ceiling. Thinking this is rather odd, he goes over to the bartender and asks about the meat on the ceiling.
The bartender tells him, "if you can jump and touch any piece of meat up there, you get free drinks for the night. If, however, you miss, you have to buy rounds for everyone in the bar."
The man looks up at the meat, then back at the bartender, then around the room at all the hopeful faces, and finally says to the bartender,
"I think I'll pass, the steaks are too high"
