Hoover Jokes
52 hoover jokes and hilarious hoover puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hoover that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
What do you get when you mix Hoover Dam and a vacuum cleaner? A whole lot of Hoover jokes that can make your day. This article highlights some of the best Hoover jokes, from dirtbag puns to Roomba quips. Whether you're a fan of the classic Hoover vacuum or the modern-day Dyson Hoovers, this article has something for everyone.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Hoover Short Jokes
Short hoover jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hoover humour may include short hobo jokes also.
- What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a Hoover vaccuum? The position of the dirt bag.
- The cleaning lady was almost finished cleaning a suite when she noticed her Hoover wasn't working. Thinking quick, she threw it out the window, making the room a vacuum cleaner.
- what's the difference between a Harley-Davidson and a Hoover vacuum? On the Hoover the Dirtbag is on the inside.
- Whistleblower reveals that the government is concealing cracks in Hoover Dam. FBI is still looking for the leak.
- Want to know why Herbert Hoover was my favorite president? Because he actually gave a dam.
- My new girl friend. Just got a new Czech girlfriend, but its taken her nearly 5 days to hoover the house. Turns out she's a Slovak.
- My wife got mad at me just because I accidentally hoovered up her contact lenses. To be fair, she was wearing them at the time.
- Did you know that if you took all the men who died while constructing the Hoover Dam and stood them all on top of each other... ... you'd be arrested.
- 'Man run over by Dyson hoover' Son: "Dad look at this article"
Dad: "Oh dear, was he alright? or did he dyson" - My Eastern European cleaner took 3 hours to hoover my living room. Turns out she's a Slovak
Share These Hoover Jokes With Friends
Hoover One Liners
Which hoover one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hoover? I can suggest the ones about abraham lincoln and vacuum.
- My son asked me, "What happens to the spiders that gets hoovered up?" "They Dyson."
- Why couldn't the Buddhist hoover the corners of his house? He had no attachments.
- Free hoover It's just collecting dust
- I think I'm going to throw away my old Hoover. It's just collecting dust anyway.
- You know your doing bad with girls when... You know your favourite hoover setting
- I think I'm gonna sell my hoover It's just collecting dust
- Had to get rid of my Hoover due to lack of use It was just sitting around collecting dust
- I believe Hoover was the only president to ever give a dam
- I haven't use my hoover in years... ...It's gathering dust!
- What are round and can be found inside a hoover? Two Os.
- Yesterday I had to buy a new hoover. My old one was just gathering dust.
- What's the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? Where you place the dirtbag
- Who was the worst U.S. President of all time? Hoover, his administration really s**....
- What's the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? The location of the dirtbag.
- I bought a Hoover the other day... It s**....
Hoover Dam Jokes
Here is a list of funny hoover dam jokes and even better hoover dam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked the turbines of Hoover Dam.
Since then, the Colorado River is a tourist attraction. - Did you hear about Hoover and Nixon's hidden relationship? Dam, was THAT a watergate scandal!
Howlingly Hilarious Hoover Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
What funny jokes about hoover you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cooper jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hoover pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My mate just hired an Eastern european cleaner, took her 15 hours to Hoover the house.
Turns out she was a Slovak.
Russian Tanks
"What's the difference between a Russian tank and a Hoover vacuum cleaner? "
"The Russian tank has 4 dirt-bags in it."
Apparently this joke comes from an OLD soviet-era General who apparently liked to tell it almost any time he gave a speeches to his NATO counterparts.
"I've found your hamster," I told my daughter over the phone.
"You're a hero!" she screamed, "Thank you so much. Can you put him back in my cage for me?"
I said, "Of course. I just need to get him out of the hoover first though."
Two Russians..
..discussed who was the greater man, Comrade Stalin or President Hoover.
Hoover taught the Americans not to drink, says one.
Yes, replies the other, but Stalin taught the Russians not to eat.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a Hoover vacuum cleaner and a Harley-David motorcycle?
The position of the dirtbag.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was watching a documentary on Chinese engineering.
They were discussing the Three Gorges Dam on the Yangtze River, the worlds largest hydroelectric dam.
My wife walks in and asks, Is that the Hoover Dam?
Me: No, it's the Three Gorges Dam in China.
Her: Oh, I guess all dams just look alike.
Me: Honey, don't be a dam racist!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just got fired from my job at Dyson.
My design for a new hoover didn't work.
I don't know what their problem is, when they asked me to design it they told me, "just make sure it doesn't s**...!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Have y'all heard 'bout the Hoover Crips?
They still Dyson with death.
I spent £200 on a new Hoover for my wife for Christmas...
I bet it ends up collecting dust
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a disabled cleaning company in Compton?
**The Hoover Crips.**
Why was Herbert Hoover such a controversial president?
Because he never let the dust settle.
I am selling my Hoover that has been in the shed for a long time.
It's only collecting dust.
The Priest who couldn't swear!
Father Murphy was playing golf with a parishioner. On the 1st hole, he sliced into the rough. His opponent heard him mutter, Hoover! under his breath.
On the 2nd hole, Father Murphy's ball went straight into a water hazard. Hoover! again, a little louder this time.
On the 3rd hole, a miracle occurred, and Father Murphy's drive landed on the green only six inches from the hole! Praise be to God!
He carefully lined up the putt, but the ball curved around the hole instead of going in. Hoover!
By this time, his opponent couldn't withhold his curiosity any longer, and asked why the priest said, Hoover.
It's the biggest dam I know.
