homesick Jokes

funny jokes and hilarious homesick stories

What are the best Homesick puns and pranks?

Did you ever wanted to prank someone about Homesick? Well here is a complete list of Homesick dad jokes:

A man goes into a brothel

He says to the madam, "Hi, I'm a traveling salesman, I've been on the road for eight weeks. I'll pay $100 for the worst blow-job in the house."

She says, "The worst...? For $100 you can have the *best* blow-job in the house!"

He says, "No, it's all right, I'm not horny, I'm homesick."


A married trucker walks into a whorehouse.

He puts $500 dollars on the front desk and says "Give me the worst blowjob ever."

The madam told him "For $500, you can have the best we offer!"

He said "I'm not horny, I'm homesick."


Man walks into a bar and orders 4 beers.

Drinks them, and leaves.

Next week same time does the same thing: orders 4 beers, drinks them, and leaves.

The third week; same thing. The bartender is curious so he asks. "well, I moved here few weeks ago. Back home my 3 brothers and I met every Thursday after work for a beer. Since I was feeling homesick I figured I would keep up the tradition even if I had to do it alone."

This goes on for several weeks until one week the man comes in and orders three beers and a coke. Bartender says, "I hate to pry but what happened? Did one of your brothers pass away?"

The man chuckles and says, "No nothing like that. I decided to quit drinking."


What do you call a homesick Asian?




Husband talking to his wife: Honey im Homesick
Wife: What do you mean you are home
Husband: I know, Im sick of it.


What is brown and crawls up your leg?

A homesick poop.


What's red and crawls up your leg?

A homesick abortion


What's red and crawls up your leg?

A homesick abortion.


The beautiful field

I haven't been home in over a year; I currently live in NYC, but am from a small town in Ohio so it's nice to go back to the country. Around six months ago, I was getting pretty homesick and just imagined going on a run on a quiet road and running out into a wide field. Well I'm home now and set out for a run today using my Dad's old running shoes. I then saw an open field, smiled, crossed the road and ran to it. Immediately, I realized the grass was really wet from the snow and my shoes got really muddy. I ran home in soggy shoes then showed my Dad the dirty shoes and he told me I'm an idiot city boy. Shit.