Hollers Jokes
22 hollers jokes and hilarious hollers puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hollers that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Hollers Short Jokes
Short hollers jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hollers humour may include short yells jokes also.
- *dinosaur at zoo roars at me* "ROAR"
whoa wat kimd of dinosaur is this
"GROWL"
hmm
"SHOUT"
hmmm
"YELL"
hmmmmm
"HOLLER"
oh its a thesaurus" - Help, we think our son has become a troll He hides in his room. We ask what he's doing. He hollers FIFA fo fun!
- Eeny meeny miny moe. Catch a tiger by the toe. If it hollers, say a prayer. Cause you're not going anywhere.
- A husband came home to find his wife in bed with another man. "What are you doing?!" he hollered.
"You see?" said the wife. "I told you he was s**...!" - A heavy set guy was showering at the gym when a gym rat hollered 'Hey man, how long since you seen your d**...'? hahaha. 'Why dont you diet'? Replying...'why, what color is it now'?
- My friend's grandparents are 75 and they still have a lot of o**... s**...... ... he yells 'Screw you', she hollers back 'Screw you too'
Share These Hollers Jokes With Friends
Hollers One Liners
Which hollers one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hollers? I can suggest the ones about shouts and hails.
- So I was peeing in the pool yesterday. The lifeguard hollered so loud, I almost fell in!
- What is expected of you between friends but unwelcome in parenting? Holler at your boy!
- Cop hollers "Stop," Frosty pauses only a moment. \#WhitePrivilege
- MEEEEEERRRRRRYYYYYY CHRIIIIIIIISTMAAAAAAAS errr sorry. Happy holler-days
Laughable Hollers Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What funny jokes about hollers you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean screams jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hollers pranks.
A guy storms into a bank, pulls out his gun, points it at a teller and hollers, Give me all your money or you're geography! Trembling, the teller stammers, D...d...don't y...y...you m...m...mean h...h...history?
The robber screams, Don't change the subject!
Bill Clinton, George W.Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington shouts, "Save the women!"
George W. Bush hollers, "Screw the women!"
Bill Clinton asks excitedly, "Do we have time?"
Taxidermist walks into a bar...
A man walks into a bar in Alabama and orders a cosmopolitan. The bartender looks at the man and says, "You're not from 'round here are ya?"
"No" replies the man, "I'm from New Hampshire." The bartender looks at him and says, "Well what do you do in New Hampshire?"
"I'm a taxidermist," says the man. The bartender looks bewildered, so the man explains, "I mount dead animals."
The bartender stands back and hollers to the whole bar, "It's OK, boys! He's one of us!"
A blonde and her friend...
Are recently hired putting up siding on a house. They're working on opposite sides so the first one goes to check on the second. She watches as she pulls a nail from her bag, lookas at it, and throws it away. She hollers up and asks what that was about. The second blonde says some of the nails are defective. The point is facing the wrong way so she throws those out. The first blonde says, " You idiot! They aren't defective, they're for the other side of the house "
A Sea Captain is complaining about how difficult his life is without a leg and an arm
He says to his crew mates, " When ye missin' two major parts of ye, thar ain't many things ye can do. "
The lookout hollers from the crow's nest " I 'ave it worse Captain! "
" Oh!? " The Sea Captain exclaims " 'n which two parts of ye be missin'? "
To which the lookout replies " Eye, eye Captain! "
Some cavalry soldiers are pinned down by a bunch of Indians.
The Major yells to the Sergeant, "Sergeant, I don't like the sound of those drums!" one of the Indians hollers, "He's not our regular drummer!"
Satchmo: "My trumpet is very handy. It tells me what time it is." Sanborn: "Seriously?" Satchmo launches into a jazzy riff.
Immediately, the occupant of the apartment next door bangs on the wall and hollers, "Hey, pipe down! Don't you know it's three o'clock in the morning?"
This will take awhile
Steve, a lonely bachelor, wants some company, so he buys a centipede and a small box for it to live in. That evening, he decides to go out.
"Want to grab a drink?" he asks the centipede, but there's no answer from the box.
A few minutes later, he asks again—still no reply. Finally, he hollers, "Hey! Do you want to get a drink?"
"I heard you the first time!" says a small, irritated voice. "I'm putting on my shoes!"
A little boy sees his father emerging from the shower...
... and wide-eyed, asks "What is that?" His flustered father answers "Well, son, that's my nerve." Later that day the boy is playing in his neighbor's yard and takes a leak in her bushes. She spots the boy in the act and hollers "You've got a lot of nerve!" The boy replies, "If you think that's a lot, you should see my dad..."
Man Raises a Toast at the Bar
He toasts, "Here's to spending the rest of my life between my wife's legs!" The crowd hoops and hollers and declares that he won Toast of the Night.
Man goes home and says, "Honey! Honey! I won Toast of the Night!"
"That's great dear!" Says his wife. "What did you toast?"
"Here's to spending the rest of my life going to church with my wife!"
Next day, Wife is out in town and runs into one of her husband's bar buddies. The buddy snickers and asks if she heard what her husband toasted last night.
"Yes, and I think it's a bit odd he'd toast that. It's only ever happened twice. The first time he fell asleep, and the second time I had to y**... his ear to make him come."
A Drunk is Walking Down the Street
he walks up to a cop and says, "Man, somebody stole my car."
The cop asks, "well where was it?"
The drunk goes, "it was on the end of this key here."
The cop replies, "I dunno man. Why don't you go down to the station and file a report down there. You fill out all the proper forms and they'll help you."
The drunk says, "OK." And he starts to walk off.
The cop hollers at him, "Hey! Before you go downtown you might want to zip up your fly."
The Drunk looks down and says, "aww man, they got my girl too!"
The teacher was quizzing the bible students...
and she asked "Who parted the Red Sea?"
Just then, rotten little Johnny poked Suzy with a pin, causing her to exclaim "Holy Moses!"
The teacher said "Very good, Suzy!"
Then the teacher asked "Who turned water into wine?"
Johnny pokes Suzy with the pin again, who hollers "Jesus Christ!"
The teacher can't contain herself, and asks Suzy "What did King Davids wife say to him as they retired for the night?"
Johnny pokes Suzy yet again, bringing forth the exclaimation "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'm gonna break it off!"
a beautiful lady in her mid 30's is on a plane that starts to go down...
Everyone starts freaking out as the plane is plummeting towards the earth. But, the young lady really starts freaking out. She screams out to everyone on the plane "I CAN'T DIE LIKE THIS, I NEED TO FEEL LIKE A REAL WOMAN BEFORE I GO DOWN LIKE THIS!" She rips off her dress and reveals her n**... body to everyone on the plane. "IS THERE ANYONE IN HERE MAN ENOUGH TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE A WOMAN!" She hollers to everyone in desperation to make love one last time. One man heeds her call, stands up, looks her dead in the eyes, rips off his shirt and throws it at her. "HERE! IRON THAT SHIRT!"
4 men entered a plane...
...an Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and a Texan and were flying across the country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says " We're having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump, at least one of you can survive" The four open the door and look out below. The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers "God Save The Queen" and jumps. The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers "Viva La France" and he also jumps. This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers "Remember the Alamo" and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.
